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Enjoy,On The Plus Side, They Do Show That He’s Healthy… Very Healthy… In Fact, We’re Jealous About How Healthy…
SOURCE: Billy-Bob’s International House O’ Headlines
[http://www.com/lol.pdqfc.wwygw.wyswyg/fid=1322833038]
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Just Another Sarkozy Political Arrangement
The office of French Prime Minister Nicolas Sarkozy has denied that his well publicized affair with former supermodel Carla Bruni has been choreographed to distract the public from his policies. The fact that the affair first became public around the time Libya’s Moammar Gadhafi visited Paris was “a mere existential coincidence,” the office stated. The office responded to allegations that the announcement that the couple was engaged were calculated to take the public’s mind off the fact that French economy was mired in a slump with the statement: “Ah, powerful, middle-aged, famous people in love – who could possibly find fault with that?”
As for rumours that if France supports the United States initiating a war with Iran, Sarkozy and Bruni will have sex on top of the Arc de Triomphe to consummate their marriage, the office shrugged its shoulders with all the Gallic charm it could muster, smiled impishly and said, “Passion, it has its own timetable.”
SOURCE: Disassociated Press
[http://www.bltdaily.com/]
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Friends Don’t Let Friends Conduct Satanic Rituals In Their Parents’ Basement
Marilyn Manson has countersued a former band mate for breach of contract. This disappointed the shock rocker’s fans, who were expecting a blood sacrifice, or at least the casting of a really nasty wart-creating spell.
SOURCE: Entertainment Right Now
[http://www.entertainmentrightnow.com/mini/smug2007/2007/12/23/shockaintwhatitusedtobe/]
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Don’t Be Too Hard On Him – They Are The Weaker Sex, After All
Here we go again – a man in business or politics whining about child care. Conservative MPP Loni MacLeod had a child when he ran for office. Did it not occur to him then that his child needed looking after? Surely, the obvious thing to do would be to have a live-in caregiver who could move with him to Ottawa when necessary.
If he is not able to organize his own life without calling on the government for help, what useful contribution can he make when he’s debating issues of the day or at weekend functions in his riding?
SOURCE: Toronto Startle
[http://www.thestartle.com/NASApp/cs/ContentServer?pagename=thestartle/Layout/Article_Type1&c=Article&cid=1088591331813&call_pageid=968885278492&col=965476972154]
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Hey, Right Hand! Do You Know Who The Left Hand Is Slapping?
SOURCE: No Comment Quotes
[http://thesepeopleareinsane.psy/update.toshtml]
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Oh, Sure, Like You Wouldn’t Impale Greg Daniels On His Own Strike Sign For The Opportunity!
I know that the only reason Jon Stewart’s people haven’t called me to guest on their show while the strike continues is that they know that, as a writer myself, I would be duty-bound to refuse to cross the picket line of striking writers. Any other explanation for not being asked to appear on the show while most of their usual guests will not appear would be too sad to contemplate.
SOURCE: Les Pages aux Folles
[http://www.lespagesauxfolles.ca]
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Consider It “Original Spin”
Pakistan President Pervez Musharraf conceded that Benazir Bhutto was more likely to have died from an assassin’s bullet than from a fall down the stairs in the middle of the street that broke her neck.
At the same time, he argued that the government did everything it could to provide security for her. “For being born, I think the blame is hers alone. If she had never been born, she would never have died. The responsibility is hers,” Musharraf said in an interview.
Islamic theologians are debating whether they can admit to scratching their heads over that one.
SOURCE: Daily Semaphore
[http://www.opinion.semaphore.co.uk/opinion/main.jhtml;sessionid=M5UF23LWOLFFPQFIQMFSM5WAVCBQ0JVC?nextPage=/DUereDE/wXeR.WZvwF?7wF~/DUereDE/s119/Os/14/JD141O.7wF!3qZiiv~/DTeReDR/s119/Os/14/e7DUeReDR.ZvwF!2iG3gimmygi2Z~vg3i&resize=null&_requestid=28678]
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So…We’re Fighting In Afghanistan To….Keep Milk And Honey Out Of The Islamic World?
SOURCE: No Comment Quotes
[http://thesepeopleareinsane.psy/update.toshtml]
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Marv Newland – What Have Ye Wrought?
Rambo Meets Anne
OPENING CREDITS
FADE IN:
EXT. PEI FIELD – DAY
Anne is standing in a field in Green Gables.
ANNE: I wonder what wonder the day will –
Rambo jumps into frame, snarling inarticulately, and sprays everything with automatic rifle fire. Anne drops to the ground in a slow motion spray of blood. Rambo pulls a grenade out of his belt, pulls the pin and throws it at her. Anne’s body is blown up. Rambo pulls a knife out of his belt and repeatedly stabs the body.
TITLE CARD: The End.
CLOSING CREDITS
RAMBO: She drew first blood! The redhead drew first blood!
FADE TO BLACK
SOURCE: Drew’s Transcript-o-rama
[http://www.transcript-o-rama.com/foolinwithnewland.shtml]
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Wars Have Been Started For Less – Oh, Wait…
According to American Vice-Admiral Kevin Cosgriff, Iranian boats aggressively approached three US navy ships in the Strait of Hormuz, an important shipping route for Persian Gulf oil, and their sailors “gave our boys the Stinkeye.”
Iranian Foreign Ministry spokesman Mohammad Ali Hosseini claims that the US navy was overreacting. “Our sailors did not give the Americans the Stinkeye,” he said. “That’s just the way they look. They can’t help the way they look. Can they?”
SOURCE: Cleveland Wheeler Dealer
[http://www.cleveland.ca/enter/index.ssf?/living/wheelerdealer/index.ssf%3fu/base/news/1106329800265770.xml]
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