Thank you, Honshu Blast-Raddius, for signing up for The Daily Me. Our search engine has combed the Internet for up to the minute news items that fit the profile you have so painstakingly filled out for us. Then, we weighted the probability that you would be interested in these articles against forms which showed what people with tastes similar to yours have liked reading in the past. And, then, wen wanted to wish all of our readers a happy Martin Robert Luther E. KingLee Day! Because what could be more bi-partisan, than a day to celebrate the owning of slaves and the vision of a truly egalitarian society where everybody has the opportunity to succeed regardless of their colour? As KingLee truly said: “I think it however a greater evil to the white man than to the black race. I have a dream that blacks are immeasurably better off here than in Africa, morally, socially & physically. My four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the colour of their skin but how long their subjugation may be necessary is known and ordered by a wise Merciful Providence.”
We couldn’t have said it better ourselves. Thank goodness we live in an enlightened state like South Carolippi!
Enjoy,
The Daily Me Staff
House Speaker Learned All He Needed To Know About Leadership From Bonnie And Clyde
How did Kevin McCarthy convert the 20 Republicans who voted against his Speakership into votes for him (or, at least, for nobody, which was almost as good)? Did he make the argument that he was the best person for the position, the best leader to get things done in this Congressional session? Or perhaps he argued that the sooner a speaker was chosen, the sooner the Republicans could pass their legislative agenda.
We now know that at least two of the holdouts received a message from McCarthy surrogate Thomas Peterffy, which read:
Oh, yeah. Reasoned argument wins the day every time!
SOURCE: Disassociated Press
[http://www.bltdaily.com/]
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If It Weren’t For False Equivalency, I’d Have No Equivalency At All!
In just released transcripts in the E. Jean Carroll defamation suit against former President Donald Trump, the President called her a “nut job” and claimed she was “sick, mentally sick” in his defence against the allegation that he raped her. Conservative politicians and media claim that this is equivalent to recent revelations that, when he was five years old, President Joe Biden kissed a girl and called her “a poopyhead” when she started to cry.
“We’re going to look into what President Bide did,” said Jim Jordan, Chair of the House Select Committee on Revenge, Repayment and Sticking It To Our Political Enemies. “Personally, I think it was reprehensible. Like, disqualifyingly reprehensible!”
“Give me a break! He was five years old!” commented White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre. But the public’s attention had already moved on to another shiny object.
SOURCE: USA Whenever
[http://www.usawhenever.com/news/national/2022-12-25-for-trump-its-no-christmas-carroll_x.htm]
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Pretty, Pretty Vacate
I thought it was a good idea for an office pool: how soon will Speaker of the House Kevin McCarthy face his first Vacate the chair vote? And it was very popular: over three quarters of the office staff participated. Unfortunately, everybody chose 10 seconds or less, so nobody was even close. Love the enthusiasm. And I don’t mind taking people’s money. But if I were to open a new pool on the same subject, would people be more realistic about their bets? A couple of days, maybe? For the adventurous, perhaps a week?
SOURCE: The Wawaneesa Group Monthly Newsletter
[http://mnc.com/flexmere/ontologicon/wawaneesa/internal/newsletters/January2023.txt]
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I’m Just Asking…
And Answering…
And Accusing…
And Condemning…
But Mostly Just Asking…
This week, the lunacy of the Democrat Party became official when the Bide Administration announced that it would be coming after your gas stove. That’s right. If President Bide gets his way, no longer will Americans be able to savour the taste of propane with their burnt burgers! This is cancel culture run amok! Why would radical liberal/socialist/anarchist/pastafarian/communists want to undermine the sacred American value of grilling burgers on Superbowl Sunday? Because they hate the working class phrase, “Now, I’m cookin’ with gas!” That’s why. Oh, sure, they may say they’re just encouraging the use of alternatives because the gas might harm small children. Well, let me tell you: gas stoves never did Herschel Walker any harm, and his mother used to change his diapers on the family’s gas stove when she was cooking…whatever it is black people eat for dinner!
SOURCE: Turducken Carlson This Late Afternoon
[https://www.fixed.com/turducken-carlson-this-late-afternoon/]
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Fiction Is The Lie That Tells The Truth
Unless It’s The Lie That Hides Behind The First Lie
The Strange Case of Doctor Devolder and Mister Santos
Anthony George Stevenson
Andover-Pffist Thrift Edition
You know how they say, “If somebody wrote this as a novel, you wouldn’t believe it? They did. I don’t.
SOURCE: Unread Book News
[http://217.204.45.07/cgi/NGoto/2/64382861?3518]
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“Democrats Say We Only Care About Babies Until They’re Born,” Said Bill Sponsor Representative Ann Wagner. “Well, We Really Showed Them, Boy Howdy!”
To show their commitment to the anti-abortion cause, the Republican majority in the House of Representatives passed the Born Alive +25 bill. The law, which has about as much chance of passing the Senate as I have of winning a gold medal in a triathlon made up of ski jumping, shooting and interpretive dance at the summer Olympics, makes it illegal for a doctor to terminate a pregnancy once the fetus has left a woman’s body and for 25 years after that.
“We already have a law against that,” pointed out minority leader Hakeem Jeffries. “It’s called ‘murder.’ Republicans love them some Law and Order, so I know that they’re familiar with the concept!”
SOURCE: Deadline News Network
[http://www.dnn.com/2023/ALLPOLITICS/01/17/reps.main/index.html]
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He Obviously Never Learned The First Lesson On How To Get Out Of A Latrine Trench
As the number of lies told by Representative George Santos has grown, calls for Speaker of the House Kevin McCarthy, who needs Santos’ vote because of the slimness of his majority, to act have kept pace with them. “You know, I’d really love to do something,” he said, “but I think we should let the Office of Congressional Ethics do its job and investigate the allegations against Representative Santos.”
Would that be the Office of Congressional Ethics that the Republicans gutted as part of its rules package?
Speaker McCarthy chuckled. “What, that? We did that to protect Matt Gaetz and Marjorie Taylor Greene, and possibly all of the members of my conference who aided in the Capitol…tour on January 6, 2021. Still, you gotta love it. It’s the gift that keeps on giving, isn’t it?”
SOURCE: The Postington Wash
[http://www.postingtonwash.com/wp-dyn/articles/A49881-2023Jan14.html]
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