Are you disappointed with the American government’s Wall Street bailout plan? Are you disappointed that you don’t really understand the American government’s Wall Street bailout plan? Are you disappointed that you didn’t get an MBA and work on Wall Street, making you ineligible to share in the American government’s bailout plan?
Perhaps you should remember: nobody gets what they want. Everybody settles.
You want: everybody in the government to deliberate calmly on the crisis so that they can find a solution that will protect the interests of taxpayers and homeowners as well as Wall Street firms. You’ll settle for: a rushed response to the crisis as long as there is something that at least makes a nod to the interests of taxpayers and homeowners. You’ll get: PANIC! PANIC! PANIC! WE NEED TO DO SOMETHING! NOW! SOONER THAN NOW! FEEL THAT? THAT’S NOT RAIN – IT’s THE SKY FALLING! PANIC! PANIC! PANIC!
On the upside, what is happening to the economy is much more exciting than the latest season of Heroes, and you don’t have to wait a week for new developments!
You want: to limit the cost to the taxpayer to the absolute minimum. You’ll settle for: limiting the cost to the taxpayer to a reasonable limit. You’ll get: over $100 billion in earmarks that have nothing to do with the financial bailout.
On the upside, Senator and presidential hopeful John “the first pork barrel-laden earmark, big-spending bill that comes across my desk, I will veto it. You will know their names. I will make them famous and we’ll stop this corruption” McCain, who voted for the bailout bill, has the first name for his list.
You want: reregulation of the banking and mortgage industries. You’ll settle for: some additional oversight of the banking and mortgage industries. You’ll get: a new accounting practice that would allow the financial industry to represent mortgages based on what they could be worth in the future rather than what they are currently worth, a slight of hand that further obscures the industry’s current problems.
On the upside, it’s so arcane that taxpayers won’t understand it, let alone knock on your Senate office door brandishing torches and pitchforks.
You want: the government to get the best price for the toxic debt that it will be buying. You’ll settle for: the government getting a reasonable price for the toxic debt that it will be buying. You’ll get: a new accounting practice that would allow the financial industry to represent mortgages based on what they could be worth in the future rather than what they are currently worth, a slight of hand that will guarantee that the government will be paying the maximum price for the toxic debt that it will be buying.
On the upside, it’s so arcane that taxpayers won’t understand it, let alone knock on the CEO’s office door brandishing torches and pitchforks.
You want: to stop the home foreclosures by empowering bankruptcy court judges to force a renegotiation of terms. You’ll settle for: stopping home foreclosures by giving some of the bailout funds to homeowners at favourable rates. You’ll get: accused of being a socialist for daring to suggest that a single penny of the bailout should go to [shudder] ordinary citizens!
On the upside, the people on Main Street are in no danger of succumbing to a moral hazard by being given government money. No, don’t thank us. Really.
You want: somebody you trust to administer the money. You’ll settle for: somebody with a good track record to administer the money. You’ll get: Rudy Giuliani, whose law firm was preparing to administer bailout funds even before the bill was passed.
On the upside, the American economy was going to be in bad shape no matter how profiteering vultures acted, so they probably aren’t going to make things worse. Much.
You want: the crooks on Wall Street to be stripped of their millions and thrown in jail. You’ll settle for: those responsible on Wall Street to have their salaries capped. You’ll get: a t-shirt that reads: “I spent $700 billion and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.”
On the upside…I, uhh, I’ll have to get back to you on that one.
You want: FDR. You’ll settle for: LBJ. You’ll get: GWB.
On the upside – you’re kidding me, right?
You want: government money with no strings attached. You’ll settle for: government money with strings attached as long as they don’t affect your executive compensation. You’ll get: government money with no strings attached. Hmm…the rich, they really aren’t like you or me – maybe they do get what they want. Otherwise, everybody (else) settles.