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When He Heard The News, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis Did A Spit Take And Shouted, “Motherferking Presidential Wannabe Wants To Get Into The Holiday Spirit‽ I’ll Show The Motherferker What The Holiday Spirit Really Means!”
To celebrate Christmas, Texas Governor Gregg Abbott bused as many as 130 immigrants to Vice President Kamala Harris’ Washington home on Christmas Eve; some were wearing t-shirts despite the fact that it was the coldest Christmas Eve on record. “Christmas is a time of sharing with those you love,” Abbott stated, “and senior members of the Biden administration have made it clear that they love illegal immigrants! I have more than I want, so I figured I would share mine with the Vice President.”
Upon arrival in Washington, the immigrants were treated with respect as they were taken to a local church where they were given weather-appropriate clothes and fed dinners donated by a local restaurant.
“What‽” Governor Abbott exclaimed. Then, he muttered, “Some people just refuse to get into the holiday spirit!”
SOURCE: Cleveland Wheeler Dealer
[http://www.cleveland.ca/enter/index.ssf?/living/wheelerdealer/index.ssf%3fu/base/news/1102099805563837.xml]
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Book Explores The Shallows Of One Man’s Spiritual Journey
What the Fuck, God? It’s Moishe Again, And I’m Running Out of Patience
Moishe Mendelbaum
Stone Soup for the Soul Press
356 pages
It’s often hard to tell when an inspirational series of books goes off the rails, when the perennial perkiness edges over into something toxic. That’s not the case with the series that began with the book, Hello, God? It’s Me, Moishe, continued with God? It’s Moishe Again – Please Pick Up, started to wear out its welcome with Hello, God? Hello God? It’s Moishe – Is This Mic On? and concludes (hopefully) with What the Fuck, God? It’s Moishe Again, And I’m Running Out of Patience.
When the series started, Moishe was living with his parents and working as a shelf jockey at his local MultiMaxiMegaMart, wondering when his life is going to start. The most recent volume, written 23 years after the first, finds Moishe still living with his parents and working as a shelf jockey at his local MultiMaxiMegaMart, still wondering when his life is going to start.
At this point, the reader can be forgiven for identifying with the absent deity.
SOURCE: Unread Book News
[http://217.204.45.03/cgi/NGoto/2/64382861?3518]
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The Former President Gives The Term “Laser-like Focus” A Wholly New – And Wholly Disturbing – Meaning
How can you tell that former President Donald Trump’s popularity is slipping? It took him almost 12 hours to sell all 45,000 of the NFT cards portraying him as a superhero – and they were a bargain at only $99 a card. If this had been 2016, they would have sold out in 12 seconds.
SOURCE: Weekends!
[http://www.nobc.com/Weekends/video/play.shtml?mea=227749]
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Curiouser And Curiouser George
Making fun of the lies newly elected Republican Representative George Santos told during the campaign is like shooting fish in a frying pan. There was, for example, the claim that he received a degree from Baruch College. Baruch College responded, “George who?” Or the claim he had worked for Goldman Sachs. The Wall Street investment firm responded, “Santos, you say? George Santos? The name is familiar, but I couldn’t say from where…” Or the claim that he had graduated from New York University. “Did he once hit me up for money?” the educational institution responded. “No? Then, I’m sorry – I got nothing.” Or the claim that he had worked for Citibank. The financial institution responded with a sneer, “We don’t employ lying liars.” Okay, that last statement probably deserves an entry in the Basket of Deplorables itself, but my New Year’s resolution is to focus, so I will let it go for now.
No, what earned Santos a dacha on the shores of Lake Outrageous, complete with a year’s supply of Vodka-a-roni, the Basket of Deplorables treat, is the lie he told Jewish groups that he was a member of their faith. And his response when the lie was revealed. Oy vey, his response when the lie was revealed!
Santos’ defence against the accusation that he lied to get votes from the Jewish community rests on a hyphen. A hyphen! That unsung workhorse of punctuation! We so take the hyphen for granted that we don’t even pronounce it in everyday speech. If Santos had said, “I’m Jew-hyphen-ish,” there would have been no confusion as to his meaning.
Santos had alternatives. He could have called himself “Jew-ey,” but that would have sounded like he was boasting about being like Halloween candy. And if he had described himself as “Jew-esque,” he would have sounded like he belonged in Vaudeville. Either way, he probably wouldn’t have received a single vote in his heavily Jewish district.
When the lie was discovered, Santos said that he had made “a poor choice of words.” Of all the times for him to discover understatement!
SOURCE: Karl’s Big Red Web Page of Unreconstructed Marxism
[http://www.bigred.commie/articles/218^.htm]
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They Bitcoined Off More Than They Could Chew
FTX Crypto imploded on news that its owner, Sam Bankman-Fried, had embezzled from the company, which was revealed to be a massive Ponzi scheme. Clearly, cryptocurrencies need to be regulated by governments to protect the public from shenanigans.
No, they don’t. The whole point of cryptocurrencies is that they protect crypto owners from the intrusiveness of governments!
Oh. Right. Still, Bitcoin, the world’s largest cryptocurrency, lost $980 billion this year, the fifth time it has lost or gained more than half of its value in the last three years. Clearly, cryptocurrencies need to be regulated by governments in order to stop such volatility.
No, they don’t! No, they don’t. The whole point of cryptocurrencies is that they protect crypto owners from the intrusiveness of governments!
Oh. Right. And yet, cryptocurrencies are the payment of choice of ransomware professionals throughout the world. Clearly, cryptocurrencies need to be regulated by governments to protect corporations and other major institutions from criminal activity.
You really don’t understand the concept of freedom, do you?
SOURCE: Wall Street Infernal
[http://online.wsi.com/article/0,,SB123413397491718808,00.html?mod=home_whats_new_which_u]
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