Parlour Games of the Eighties
PREMISE: A high-ranking government official is sitting alone in a room with a big box. He has just found out that he has been shifted to an embassy post overseas.…
Power Accounting Practices 101
"Hello, and welcome again to Power Accounting Practices 101. Today's lesson will be given by Doctor William Atherton, whose latest success was the books for the Darlington nuclear generating station…
The Tin Can
2:49:18. Time. I used to think I had all the time in the world, that I didn't have to hurry or rush about like all the other people around me.…
Wired for Sound
"Excuse me, but, do you have the time?" Rudolph looked at the young man sitting next to him on the bus. Not only did the man not respond to Rudolph's…
Me and the Crue
Now, you must appreciate that I rate heavy metal music only slightly higher than the creation of Spam on my list of the greatest achievements of the human race. Thus,…
Random Thoughts on Public Transit
Sign posted in all Toronto Transit Commission buses: "The operator of this vehicle has been successfully selected and trained for his duties. He is required to comply with the law…
The Comet’s Tale
"Hey, Ira!" my sister shouted, "Somebody outside wants to see you!" "Tell whoever it is to come inside!" I shouted back. "I don't know if that's such a good idea..."…
Justice By the Book
(ITEM: a former student at the University of Toronto was convicted of theft by a Provincial Court of Ontario judge and sentenced to seven days in jail, a three year…
When Elves Rebel
"He wants what?" a tiny voice cried. "When? Well, we're just going to have to see about this!" I was sitting at a table in the kitchen, contemplating biting into…
The Operation Was a Success, But the Country Died
Prime Minister Merkin Muffler looked out the window at the water flowing through the Rideau Canal. Funny, he thought, but no matter how people and their institutions change, and they…
My Reversion at the Full Moon
I woke up in the hospital bed, which seemed peculiar to me at the time because I had no recollection of going to sleep in one. A big police officer…
Spring Cleaning
Have you ever written anything down, an important scrap of information, perhaps, pr an idea for something really creative, something you didn't want to forget, and not known what the…