The Ecstasy of Flight
"Hello, Deltoid Airlines Reservation Desk, Bob speaking. How may I help you?" "Hi. I have to be in New York on business for a week next month, and I was…
Orchestrated Chaos
"The history of humanity is a history of small pockets of pleasure squeezed out of a continuum of misery. But, in the latter half of the twentieth century, North America…
The Placebo Effect
Roger Overbudget, Deputy Minister of Miscellaneous Government Activity, was pleased. The assembled members of the Theoretical Action Consultative Taskforce could tell he was pleased by the way he thrummed "My…
Deadline News: Gallumphing Into History…
Good evening. Our top story tonight: President Ronald Reagan attended a grade six civics class in Columbia, Missouri this week. "This was not an attempt to get the President to…
The Boothought Principle
They say that we make fun of what we fear the most. (I refer, of course, to the Department of They, the 1200 person, quasi-official federal agency that was given…
Deadline News: A Clown Too Far…
Good evening. Our top story tonight: Prime Minister Brian Mulroney continued to defend his acceptance of $308,000 from the PC Canada Fund for renovations to the official residence at 24…
The American Cold War Foreign Policy Algorithm
1) Is the government of this country going to harm our economic interests? 1 NO 2) Continue trade and diplomatic relations. 1 YES 3) Is this government an American…
Deadline News: Rumours of Glory…
Good evening. Our top story tonight: is it just my imagination, or does Canadian Auto Workers President Bob White really look and sound like Pat Paulsen? Are there any pictures…
Brilliance on a Budget
Everybody wants to make brilliant conversation at parties, but who has the time to keep up with the myriad of subjects on which one may need an opinion? Here at…
POLlies Want a Cracker?
Longer than the Emmies! More exciting than the Oscars! Prettier than the Junos! That's right - in a mad rush to fill column inches in newspapers full of holiday advertising…
Politics – A Musical Comedy – Contents
Introduction: Of Ambush Interviews and Knobheads I. AARDVARK Scene 1: Aardvark The Canadian Establishment and I One More Striking Example Some Might Call It Art Five Hundred Million Is a…
Introduction: Of Ambush Interviews and Knobheads
The rumours about me had been circulating for weeks, and I figured I had to make myself scarce in order to avoid the inevitable journalistic feeding frenzy. Sure enough, I…