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Who Are You To Question Headlines’ Decision To – Oh, Hi, Chief…

Somewhere Over The Rainbow
Far, Far Over
Closer To The Moon, Really


“9/11 is where it all started. But where does it end?”

Toronto Star


Apply Zeno’s Paradox Before They Arrive


“How do I keep kids safe heading back to school?”

Toronto Star


Not Wearing Wet Clothes Has Many Benefits

What?


“Are there health benefits to #DryJanuary?”

Toronto Star


Sure, If Their Children Are Willing To Eat Peanut Butter And Concrete Sandwiches For The Next 20 Years


“Can they save for their kids and still get that pool?”

Toronto Star


Sure: It Gives You An Opportunity To Price Yourself Out Of The Market, Cutting Out The Middle Man


“Is fractional real estate a smart way to invest?”

Toronto Star


Sadly, Asking Sophie Was No Help


“Biden’s Choice: Stop Corruption, Or Migration?”

New York Times


Because Having Them Lie On Top Of Each Other, While A Good Way To Meet New People, Is The Antithesis Of Social Distancing


“Why force people to line up for limited supply of vaccine?”

Toronto Star


We Want To Be The Age Of Majority – Does That Count?


“Trudeau wants a majority. Do the rest of us?”

Toronto Star


It Depends: Are We Talking About My Waistline Or My Ego?


“Are we headed for inflation or deflation?”

Toronto Star


Lumps In The Bag Keep Squirming
That’s What You Get For Following The Chaz Addams School Of Parenting


“Warning signs: How do you know if your child is struggling?”

Toronto Star


You Mean The Raucous Mob Outside Of Police Headquarters?
You Couldn’t Silence Them With A Cone The Size Of A City Block!


“Why are the rights of the unvaccinated being silenced?”

Toronto Star


Time Waits For No Headline


“Is it time to expand housing in low rise neighbourhoods?”

Toronto Star

“Is it time for Canada to ditch the Queen?”


Toronto Star

“Is it time to forgive yourself for clinging to hurt so long?”


Toronto Star

“Is it time to look beyond Wall Street’s giants?”


Globe and Mail

“Is it time to liberate LTC home residents?”


Toronto Star

“Is it time to start weighing airline passengers?”


Toronto Star

“Is it time to mind the Gap once again?”


Toronto Star


Sure. In The Same Way That KKK Members Head Black Lives Matter And Cannibals Are The Most Prominent Advocates For Vegan Lifestyles


“Are Canadian oil producers environmental ‘leaders?'”

Toronto Star


We Wouldn’t Have, But Everybody Preferred To Watch Loki


“Will Canada face a pandemic baby bust?”

Toronto Star


No, I’m Pretty Sure People Still Need To Get Their Jabs In The Arm


“Can online course on vaccines really work?”

Toronto Star


The Devil Is Still Satisfied With Their Deal


“Why Is Microsoft Still Here?”

New York Times


Make Sure All Of Your Sensitive Communications Is Done Over Signal


“What can we do about invasive plants?”

Toronto Star


I Hope. That’s. Not The C.a – Dam.mit!


“Can the vaccine cause abnormal periods?”

Toronto Star


Sure, But, To Be Fair, The Province Took It From The American Republicans
Bad Politicians Borrow, Terrible Politicians Steal


“Is O’Toole plan for health car from Alberta’s playbook?”

Toronto Star


Stuck In Our 20th Century Imaginations


“It’s 2021. Where’s our 21st-century election?”

Toronto Star


No, But At Least The Human Race Will Go Extinct In Style


“Can luxury and sustainability co-exist?”

Globe and Mail


Have A Steady Supply Of Tissues And A Rocket Launcher Handy
(I Come From The Bruce Cockburn School Of Relationship Advice)


“How can I help my friend whose husband cheats?”

Toronto Star


To Make Residents Of The Other Provinces Feel Jealous…Or Superior


“Why is one-province party allowed in debate?”

Toronto Star


To The Anti-vaccine Movement


“Where have all the loons gone?”

Toronto Star


Why Don’t You Ask The Afghans?


“Did 9/11 make us better people?”

Toronto Star


Because Being Injected With Poison To Satisfy One’s Vanity Is Still Icky


“Why is there still a stigma around Botox?”

Toronto Star


Too Explosive


“Why aren’t handguns an election issue?”

Toronto Star


On Their Windows? Perhaps.
On Their Hospital Gowns? Eww!


“Could opening the curtains benefit dementia patients?”

Globe and Mail


Barry Allen Thinks So (Although Why Anybody Would Listen To The Opinion Of A Crime Scene Investigator On The Arts Is Beyond Me)


“Do flashy film festivals still matter?”

Toronto Star


As Soon As It Recovers From Its Domestic Policy Disasters
So…Maybe When Your Grandchildren Are Your Age


“When will America learn from its foreign policy disasters?”

Toronto Star


You’ve Been Watching Too Many Superhero Movies


“Is it OK to go running without a shirt?”

Toronto Star


Larry, Curly And Moe


“Who are the key players amid Afghan upheaval?”

Toronto Star


My Computer Insists


“COOKIES FOR BREAKFAST?”

Toronto Star


With The Tory Leader’s Power To Feed Off The Souls Of The Gullible, He Would Have Been Even Worse Two Years From Now


“If O’Toole is so dangerous, why did Trudeau call election?”

Toronto Star


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