Elon Musk Owns The Flying Cab Company
“Why book a limo when you can hail a flying cab?”
– Toronto Star
Of Course
Maybe Not To The Questions You Actually Asked, But Maybe Next Time You Should Up Your Questions Game
“Will we get answers when convoy inquiry releases report?”
– Toronto Star
Beds Next To Each Other At Rekall, Inc.
“Tour de l’amour
France’s Loire Valley is famous for love stories and fairy-tale castles. What could be a dreamier trip for two?”
– Toronto Star
Sure – As Long As You Know Base 17
“Can AI help weigh opioid risk?”
– Toronto Star
What Are You Talking About? Most Billionaires Are Seniors, And They Get Tons Of Tax Breaks!
“Why no tax breaks for seniors?”
– Toronto Star
Yes, Although It Would Be More Accurate To Say That I Was Taking The Guidelines To Liver
“Are you taking the new alcohol guidelines to heart?”
– Toronto Star
The Poor House
“Where are the philanthropists with empathy?”
– Toronto Star
Hopefully After We Raise The Bar
“With city in limbo, when will we have a new mayor?”
– Toronto Star
He Plays To His Base
“How could Ford be that naive?”
– Toronto Star
Ha Ha Ha! Ho Ho – Hee Hee!
Oh, Wait – You Were Serious, Weren’t You?
“If my house is destroyed, will insurance cover full cost to replace it?”
– Toronto Star
Hearts On Sleeves Are All The Rage
“‘What should I wear for Valentine’s Day?'”
– Toronto Star
By Nipping, Tucking And Buffing?
I’m With The WOPR On This One
“Aging is a game that women can’t win
Who better than Madonna to blow up the system that pressures women to nip, tuck and buff?”
– Toronto Star
I Would Say “Keep Men Off It,” But I Already Have Too Many Reasons To Stay Off Twitter
“What would women do to keep TTC safe?”
– Toronto Star
Probably After OCP Crime Prevention Unit 001 But Before Cyberdyne Systems Model 101
“Can Tesla’s Cybertruck Soon Become Reality?”
– New York Times
You Don’t Want To Know
Let’s Just Say It Won’t Respect Your Cellphone In The Morning
“What is TikTok doing with my data?”
– Toronto Star
Fourteen Million Souls
It Was A (Devil’s) Bargain At Twice The Price!
“How much did we pay for Pope’s apology tour?”
– Toronto Star
Be Thankful You Held Out As Long As You Did
Most Of Us Realize It’s All Just Hopeless By The Time We’re Six!
“I’m 35 and single. Is it all just hopeless?”
– Toronto Star
Something Bitter (You May As Well Get Used To The Taste From The Beginning)
“What wine should I serve at my wedding?”
– Toronto Star
Only If You’ve Practised Enough That You’re Sure You Won’t Shank It
“Should I tee up new relationship?”
– Toronto Star
The Government Wouldn’t Have Let Us Know About Them
“What if balloons really were from outer space?”
– Toronto Star
Possibly
Unfortunately, The Old Guard Are Experts At Rearguard Actions
“Time for city’s old guard to step aside?”
– Toronto Star
He Has A Lot Of For-profit Hospital Administrator Friends Who Can Advise Him
“How can Ford fix health care if he can’t fix plates?”
– Toronto Star
Donald Trump
“What happened to saying ‘thank you’?”
– Toronto Star
Bambi And Faline…I’ve Always Been A Bit Literal…
“Who was at your stag and doe?”
– Toronto Star
If They Don’t, Moral Panics Usually Do
“Break free from grasp of Tik Tok
Do the risks of social-media addiction extend further than mere self-harm?”
– Toronto Star
Maybe Not, But It’s Definitely Worse Than Million Dollar Tax Fraud, SO THROW THE BOOK AT THEM!
“Is fare evasion worse than not feeding meter?”
– Toronto Star
Have You Seen Iran’s Military? They’re Scary!
“Why won’t Canada get tough with Iran’s military?”
– Toronto Star
Is Your Bestie Dating Him, Too?
If Not, On What Basis Would She Be Able To Judge?
“I hadn’t dated anyone like him, but would my bestie approve?”
– Toronto Star
Locked In A Safety Deposit Box For When We Needed It
All We Had To Do Was Remember Where We Kept The Key…
And Which Branch Of The Bank The Box Was In…
“Where was the common sense?”
– Toronto Star
They Don’t Know Which Bank The Common Sense Is Kept In
“Why don’t they stop the scams?”
– Toronto Star