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Despite Its Rigorous Mathematical Modelling, Anus Physics Disgusts Most Researchers
The State of Wisconsin has disappeared into a black hole of its own making.
Frederick Prehn, a dentist, cranberry farm owner and gun shop owner, refused to vacate his position on the state Natural Resources Board (NRB) even though his term was up. Democratic Governor Tony Evers nominated somebody to take his place, but the overwhelmingly Republican state senate refused to confirm the nominee. The state Supreme Court subsequently decided that Prehn could only be forced to leave office when his successor was chosen.
This series of decisions caused an infinite paradoxical feedback loop:
“I have never seen such a perfect example of politicians causing a state to disappear up its own anus,” said political physicist Raffael Krishnamurthi. “If Stephen Hawking is correct, the resulting political black hole should radiate environmentally destructive decisions.”
SOURCE: Scientific Canadian
[http://www.scican.com/article.cfm?chanID=sc003&articleID=1124H3EC-2C145-20K5-BBB1582614B711111]
28 or 6 to 4) Why Do You Fill Out These Surveys?
a) The TV In My Dentist’s Office Is Playing Fox, And I Already Have Too Much Pain To Look Forward To
b) It Dulls The Pain Of The Knowledge Of The Futility Of Our Existence
c) I Don’t Know. Can I…Borrow That Asterisk And Get Back To You When I’ve Figured It Out?
25 or 6 to 4) What is “independent state legislature” theory?
a) a big, fat Independence Day gift for Trevor Noah
b) a big, fat Independence Day gift for Republican state legislators who worry that their legislative agendas might be inhibited by, you know, democracy and stuff
c) a big, fat Independence Day gift for the Koch brothers (that they admittedly bought for themselves, but it’s the thought that counts…)
d) all of the above
26 or 6 to 4) Okay, you’ve had your fun. But seriously, what is “independent state legislature” theory?
a) the legal idea that democracy is too important to be left to the people
b) the argument that state governments should have the right to throw out the results of a federal election and choose representatives for the people of their state because…that is to say, on account of…we mean for the reason that…tell you what, it has something to do with the Constitution, but we’re not exactly sure what, so let’s just put an asterisk on that and get back to it…some day…
c) a big, fat Independence Day gift to federal Republicans who believe they shouldn’t lose elections just because their candidate doesn’t get as many votes as the Democrat
d) all of the above
27 or 6 to 4) Aren’t you glad I asked?
a) this is why voter turnout in elections is so dismal
b) I’d say you should have given me the sugar-coated answer, but this was this sugar-coated answer, wasn’t it?
c) I’m never glad I fill out these surveys – why do I fill out these surveys?
SOURCE: Les Pages aux Folles
[http://www.lespagesauxfolles.ca]
more
Henry “Moose Killer” Malloy
Are You Gonna Tell Him Not To? Go Right Ahead. I Have A Family To Support!
“Who is allowed to ride a bike on the sidewalk?”
– Toronto Star
SOURCE: Billy-Bob’s International House O’ Headlines
[http://www.com/lol.pdqfc.wwygw.wyswyg/fid=1026453027]
Be Afraid Of The Blood-curdling Sight
Of The Turtle King Crowing At Midnight
Every time Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell speaks, an angel throws up a little in its mouth.
The recent Supreme Court decision that overturned Roe v. Wade took away a right women had exercised for 50 years. Plessy v. Ferguson gave black people the same rights as white people to participate in American society. To hear Mitch McConnell tell it, the two decisions were separated at birth, (although one was obviously mutilated to hide its paternity). According to McConnell, Plessy V. Ferguson also took away a fundamental right away from Americans (the right of white people to discriminate against black people). The logic is so tortured, the Spanish Inquisition can only look on in awe.
You may notice that McConnell feels no need to explain what was outdated or wrong about Roe v. Wade. Perhaps science has discovered that from the moment cells start dividing in a woman’s womb, they can do higher mathematics or appreciate comic opera? Maybe the majority in Roe v. Wade was drunk when they decided the case and mistakenly thought women had rights? It should come as no surprise that he doesn’t make these arguments: the Minority Leader may be willing to torture logic, but he doesn’t want to kill it outright because he may need it some day.
SOURCE: Karl’s Big Red Web Page of Unreconstructed Marxism
[http://www.bigred.commie/articles/218^.htm]
It’s Missing The facts, Compassion And Humour
Otherwise, It’s Uncanny How Much It Resembles Roger And Me!
2,000 Mules and a Green Acres
written and directed by Dinesh “2,000 Conspiracy Theories and a Brain Cell” D’Souza
produced by the Committee to Reelect the President and Les Cheres Freres Koch
2,000 Mules and a Green Acres is the film that rips the lid off the – sorry, I meant RIPS THE LID OFF THE DEMOCRATIC CONSPIRACY TO STEAL THE 2020 ELECTION! This is the kind of film that telegraphs its conclusions in bold-face, all caps before you even enter the theatre.
According to the film, Democratic “mules” collected tens of thousands of ballots in swing states and delivered them to corrupt state election officials. Their proof? A woman in one of the states saw somebody drop half a dozen advance votes into a box. It turned out the man was dropping off the votes for himself and his family, but if that’s allowed, then anything is possible! ANYTHING!
Need more proof? An organization that uses cellphone geolocation to track war criminals reported that many of the mules had attended antifa actions (which were referred to as “riots” by the excitable producers of the film). The company denies that it collected such data, making a convincing argument that such a thing wasn’t even possible, but that just means that they’ve been paid off.
That not enough proof for you? One diagram in the film purports to show mule geolocations superimposed over a map of Atlanta. The map is actually of Moscow, which is in Russia. When confronted by this, D’Souza argued that the map was more conceptual than factual.
2,000 Mules and a Green Acres is the Showgirls of documentary films: it started out being promoted as a serious movie, but, after months of ridicule, expect it to be relabelled a comedy.
SOURCE: Imaginary Movie Database
[http://www.imd.com/title/tt01782000/]