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The Daily Me – Hy Lee Selastic

Thank you, Hy Lee Selastic, for signing up for The Daily Me. Our search engine has combed the Internet for up to the minute news items that fit the profile you have so painstakingly filled out for us. Then, we weighted the probability that you would be interested in these articles against forms which showed what people with tastes similar to yours have liked reading in the past. Then, we wondered what the New York Times‘ position was on French President Francois Hollande cheating on his live in lover with his mistress. Then, we wondered why we cared what the New York Times‘ position was on French President Francois Hollande cheating on his live in lover with his mistress. We don’t care what we think about French President Francois Hollande cheating on his live in lover with his mistress, and we’re us!

Enjoy,
The Daily Me Staff

Oddly, Not As Much Fun As Bob Dylan Makes It Sound

Everybody Must Get Droned

Well, they’ll drone ya when you’re trying to be so good
They’ll drone ya when you’re walkin’ in your hood
They’ll drone ya when you’re drivin’ to your home
Then they’ll drone ya if you’re with friends or alone

For this, I feel we surely must atone
Everybody must get droned

Well, they’ll drone ya when you’re standing in the street
They’ll drone you when your fannin’ in the heat
They’ll drone you when you’re dancin’ on the floor
They’ll drone you when you’re steppin’ through the door

For this, I feel we surely must atone
Everybody must get droned

They’ll drone ya when you’re tryin’ to get high
They’ll drone ya when you’re life passes you by
They’ll drone ya when you’re gambling out of luck
They’ll drone ya and then they’ll pass the buck

Tell ya what, I feel we must atone
Everybody must get droned

Well, they’ll drone you til the very bitter end
Then they’ll drone once more and then once again
They’ll drone you when you’re drinking in a bar
They’ll drone you when you’re smashing your guitar

Yes, but I feel we must atone
Everybody must get droned

Well, they’ll drone you while your singin’ all your songs
They’ll drone you though you’ve done nothin’ wrong
They’ll drone you and ignore that they are cowards
They’ll drone as into your grave you’re lowered

For this, I feel we surely must atone
Everybody must get droned

SOURCE: Poetry, Cornered

[http://www.cibc.com/ca/personal/poetrycorner/680.html]
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Aren’t You Getting MacIntyred Of The Whole Scandal?

Okay, so, Scott MacIntyre, the former common-law spouse of Mayor Rob Ford’s sister, is suing the Mayor, claiming that the chief magistrate was responsible for a vicious beating the convicted drug dealer received in prison. MacIntyre further claims that he was the person Mayor Ford stated in a drunken stupor that he wanted to kill in the video that the media have dubbed “Super Happy Fun Times with Robbie.”

Nice family. If Ford really loved the city, he would put his family at the centre of a reality TV show and donate all of the proceeds to the treasury!

SOURCE: The Matrixxx

[http://www.thematrixxxto.com/news/city/ford-family-values/]
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Yeah, Yeah – Perspective Is For Bronze Medalists!

In 1615, the Roman Inquisition investigated Galileo Galilei’s claim that the Earth revolved around the sun. Almost a dozen children were inspired to become astronomers by his example. Then, the Inquisition determined that he was wrong, and the children scrambled to find other careers.

In 1916, Albert Einstein published a paper called “Relativity: The Special and the General Theory,” which completely upset the way we looked at the world. As a result, dozens of children were inspired to become theoretical physicists. Most would drop out because the math was too hard.

In 1953, Francis Crick and James D. Watson published “Molecular Structure of Nucleic Acids: A Structure for Deoxyribose Nucleic Acid” in Nature, a paper which described the double helix form of DNA. This triumph led children throughout the world to consider careers in molecular biology. Then, the 1960s happened, and most of them were too high to finish their degrees.

Kind of puts the Olympics in perspective, doesn’t it?

SOURCE: Ad Meek

[http://www.admeek.com/A&W/national/article_display.jsp?nuvu_content_id=1463952684]
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This Is A One Time Deal: Otherwise, The Danger Pay Would Bankrupt Us!

He talks smack (about other City Councillors). And, he lies about it. He smokes crack. And, he lies about. He is videotaped smoking crack, and he lies about. He claims to have saved taxpayers a billion dollars. And, an objective analysis of the budget shows that he was lying about it. Despite this (and, it’s just the highlight reel), 40 per cent of Torontians say they would vote for Rob Ford if an election for Mayor of Toronto was held today.

Why?

We sent reporters into the brains of Rob Ford supporters to see if they could find an answer to this question. This is what they found:

WEALTHY FORD SUPPORTERS

NOT WEALTHY FORD SUPPORTERS

SOURCE: Politics For Dummies

[http://www.politicsfordummies.com/home.asp?did=793&dir=bb]
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Just Another Command Performance Of The SIRC De Oy Vey!

Chuck Strahl, chair of the Security Intelligence Review Committee (SIRC), announced his resignation from the part-time post that monitors CSIS. While he was SIRC chair, Strahl had lobbied the federal government on the Northern Gateway Pipeline; coincidentally, CSIS had been monitoring native and environmental groups opposed to the development.

Remind me, again, of how if you have done nothing illegal, you have nothing to fear from government surveillance?

SOURCE: The Quick and the Detwiler

[http://quick&detwiler.blogspot.com/]
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So-chi?
So-key?
Saw-key?
Saw-chi?
Sawwww-chhhhhhi?
Best Pronunciation Is Probably: Boon-dog-el…

TSN has announced that it will be airing 250 hours of coverage of the Sochi Olympics. Twelve of those hours will be of actual competition – the other 238 hours will contain profiles of athletes, trainers, security personnel and our own commentators, inane sports banter and, of course, advertisements.

SOURCE: The Schwartz Sports Report

[http://www.schwartzsportsreport.com/ssr-news.shtml.htm#42838180463]
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Oh, The Inhumanity!

The Harper Government of Canada has condemned Ontario’s move to provide medical care to those seeking asylum in Canada, something the federal government decided to stop doing months ago. “The Ontario government thinks it can win brownie points with voters by displaying something called…compassion,” spat out Citizenship and Immigration Minister Chris Alexander. “The Canadian people will see through this – they know that people fleeing repressive regimes deserve our scorn, not a pitifully small amount of our tax dollar funded health care!”

The problem with compassion, as the Harper Government of Canada sees it, is that it has no boundaries. “What’s next?” Alexander mused. “Labourers being given a living minimum wage? Better treatment of war veterans? Sprinklers in old age homes? No, once you start down this road of compassion, it’s a slippery slope with no bottom!”

SOURCE: The Financial Riposte

[http://www.canada.com/national/nationalwhippingpost/financialriposte/story.html?id=16ddccd7-f6f3-4f4f-9f25-am2b4fm6a528]
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