Thank you, Harsh Mei Karmar, for signing up for The Daily Me. Our search engine has combed the Internet for up to the minute news items that fit the profile you have so painstakingly filled out for us. Then, we weighted the probability that you would be interested in these articles against forms which showed what people with tastes similar to yours have liked reading in the past. And, then, the entertainment world exploded. Filmmaker Oliver Stone expressed support for homicidal world leader Vladimir Putin because he had never seen evidence Putin had ordered the killing of his political rivals. And we thought: Since when did the conspiracy-loving Stone ever need evidence! Or British actor Michael Gambon’s obituaries focusing on his work on the Harry Potter movies, largely relegating his searing performance in The Singing Detective to a paragraph near the end. Okay, maybe that’s fitting for an exploration of human memory. But the battle MAGAts are waging against Taylor Swift and her new boyfriend, football star Travis Kelce? Talk about picking a fight you can’t win!
Enjoy,
The Daily Me Staff
We’re Protecting The Children…From Having Their Words Taken Out Of Context By Lamestream Libtard Journalists.
About recent anti-LGBTQ protests outside her school, Myrna Costigan, a grade 9 student at Sacheen Littlefeather High in North York, said, “I believe that -“
Aloysius Creosote, President of the advocacy group Parents For Parental Parenting, interrupted: “My parents love me very much and only want what’s best for me.”
“Well, you see, now,” Costigan tried to continue, “that’s not entirely true of -“
“Parents who want our children to be indoctrinated with extreme left ideas about gender?” Creosote interrupted again. “Oh, I know. There are only two genders in god’s design, so there should only be two genders taught in our classrooms!”
“If you would just let me speak -” Costigan tried one more time.
“You would agree with everything I say,” Creosote interrupted one final time. “You don’t have to tell me. I know. Now, go back to your closet and finish your homework!”
SOURCE: The Chronicle of Lower Education
[http://lowerchronicle.com/weekly/v9/i13/36a02601.htm]
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Don’t Be Fooled! Atomwaffen Does NOT Mean Nuclear Waffles!
Mmm…Waffles…
House of Commons Speaker Anthony Rota has resigned after asking all those who attended a speech by Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy to recognize a Ukrainian who fought Russia during World War II with a standing ovation. It turns out, he fought Russia as a member of the Nazi Party.
Oops.
Canadian members of the Atomwaffen Division looked on with envy. “Some day, that will be one of us,” one of the members, who asked to be identified as “Grey Wolfe Baring Teet” (at least, that’s how it was spelled in his email) sniffed.
SOURCE: Glob and Maul
[http://www.globandmaul.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20230928.eladvote0928_@/BNStory/newsOops2023/]
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You, Uhh, Understand That Taking Out Ads On TwitterX Is The Opposite Of Stealthy, Don’t You?
Because If You Don’t, I Can Almost Guarantee That The Ottawa Police Do
FENRIR
@FENRIR___13
Convoy 2.0, Stealth Convoy! Roll in radio silent, no honking. Block off main roads and set up camp. Canadas Silent Convoy Protest!! Trudeau Must GO!!!!
SOURCE: Ending Trending Web Site
[http://endingtrending.blurgh/ssh-quiet-everybody-were-trying-to-be-stealthy-I-SAID-BE-QUIET-WERE-TRYING-TO-BE-STEALTHY/]
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If It Weren’t For False Equivalence, I Would Have No Equivalence At All
Former President Donald Trump went to Detroit to speak to an auto plant to show his solidarity with workers on the same day that actual President Joe Biden went to Detroit to speak to an auto plant to show his solidarity with workers. Quelle coincidence!
At the unionized plant, President Biden talked about the hardships he faced as a child of working class parents. At the non-unionized plant, non-President Trump talked about the hardships he faced as a child of wealthy parents. The parallels are obvious.
At the Not President Trump photo opp, a woman who held a sign reading “union members for Trump” was not actually a union member. But that was okay, because another person with a sign that said “auto workers for Trump” wasn’t an auto worker. In Republican Presidential campaign math, they cancelled each other out.
SOURCE: Not to Belabour the Point
[http://www.n2btp.com/content/1&ID=%25%22%2DT%2FRE%2C%20%0A&type=a&mr=332&CFID=723762&CFTOKIN=18757215]
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I’m Going To Suggest – And I Know, In The Current Political Climate, This Is Going To Sound Crazy – Not Doing It?
Saskatchewan Premier Scott Moe has said that he will be invoking the notwithstanding clause of the Constitution to override a court decision to pause a provincial policy that requires parental consent when children under 16 want to go by different names and pronouns at school.
“People have objected that this issue is not important enough to invoke the notwithstanding clause,” Moe said, “but what could be more important than making queer children suffer?”
SOURCE: Festerin’ Report
[http://www.ax2grindnet.com/festerinreport/web/feature222222222222-22.html]
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World Leader Proves Line Isn’t Only For Anti-social Media
Russian President Vladimir “The Gentler Impaler” Putin said in an address marking the first anniversary of the invasion of Ukraine that the residents of four regions that Moscow illegally annexed “made their choice to be with their Fatherland.”
Israel’s Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, watching with envy, muttered, “I’m totally gonna steal that!”
SOURCE: The Arad Post
[http://www.apost.com/servlet/Satellite?pagename=APost/APArticle/ShowFull&cid=1324851597765]
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On Second Thought, Don’t Tell Us!
Obits ‘R Us would like to apologize to our readers for an obituary we ran last week in which Rupert Murdoch was referred to as “a flaming pustule on the backside of humanity” and “a screeching, grating emotional black hole in the form of a man.” This was in poor taste, as was the comment that, “The world would have been much better off if he had died of Dengue Fever at the age of three!”
Thus ends our experiment in honestly assessing the value of a person’s life. Moving forward, our obituaries will only contain carefully chosen cheery memories and vague platitudes about a life well lived.
SOURCE: Obits ‘R Us
[http://www.king.ids.net/~bdlm/obits_r_us.html]
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They Keep Their Freak Out In A Bottle They Will Open When They Go To See The New Exorcist Movie
To celebrate the first anniversary of the illegal Russian invasion of Ukraine, the American Congress passed an interim budget that included no funding for the support of the beleaguered country’s defence.
“We all celebrate special occasions in our own unique way,” said Chaos Caucus (not a real thing except in his own mind) Chair Matt Gaetz. Although, looking closely at the video, a ghostly image of former President Donald Trump’s face seemed to be superimposed on the face of Gaetz, and listening more intently, one could hear a faint echo to his words in the former President’s cadence.
It is a testament to how numb Americans have become to political shenanigans that this didn’t freak the hell out of everybody.
SOURCE: The Postington Wash
[http://www.postingtonwash.com/wp-dyn/articles/A49881-2023Sep30.html]
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