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Ingraham (And Egg On Her Face)
Trust Fox News host Laura Ingraham to state out loud what nobody was actually thinking: unemployment insurance causes spiritual hunger. When somebody gets a UI check, they don’t immediately think, Finally, I can afford those dented cans of spaghettios for lunch that I’ve been craving all week! No. When they get their unemployment check, people think,
Does this invalidate me as a human being? How can I exercise my will to power when I am dependent upon the state for my physical well-being?
What? She wasn’t talking about the human hunger for meaning? She must be full of shit, then. She must have been talking about physical hunger, even though she sort of, kinda, made a not especially convincing stab at denying it.
What Ingraham proposes is like sending a seven year-old to bed without their supper because they wouldn’t mow the lawn to earn their allowance. Every night for the rest of their life. Economic theory tells us that if a child isn’t willing to mow the lawn, their allowance needs to be raised to the point where they would be willing to do it.
It can be surprising that those who scream about free markets the loudest do not understand how they actually work. But, in the Basket of Deplorables, you don’t have to be a Nobel Prize winning economist to call it what it is: Tuesday.
SOURCE: Karl’s Big Red Web Page of Unreconstructed Marxism
[http://www.bigred.commie/articles/218^.htm]
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If Only Dogs Voted, This Whistle Alone Would Give The Tories A Landslide Victory
“We must secure the existence of our people and a future for white children.”
– white supremacist slogan known as the “14 words”
“Secure the future”
– Conservative Party of Canada campaign slogan
SOURCE: No Comment Quotes
[http://thesepeopleareinsane.psy/update.toshtml]
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Invading 20 Years Ago Was The First Line Crossed, But It Was By No Means The Last
How, to just about everybody’s surprise, did the country’s Army collapse so quickly after the United States withdrew its troops from Afghanistan? A simple graph explains it.
On the graph, the black line represents the Afghan Army’s ability to defend the country against the Taliban over time. The red line represents the American military’s faith in the ability of the Afghan Army to defend the country against the Taliban in the same time period. The green line represents American politician’s faith in the ability of the Afghan Army to defend the country against the Taliban (after briefings by the American military).
What the graph demonstrates is the failure of hope over reason.
SOURCE: Politics For Dummies
[http://www.politicsfordummies.com/home.asp?did=1015&dir=bb]
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Reputation Of Famed Game Show In Jeopardy
FADE IN:
INT. SET OF JEOPARDY – DAY
MIKE RICHARDS: …our last contestant is Abercrombie Fitch, a wholesale pig lipstick salesman from Dubuque, Kentucky. I hear you have the “unusual” hobby of building model cities, Abercrombie. What’s so unusual about that?
ABERCROMBIE FITCH: They’re Martian cities, Mike.
RICHARDS: There are no cities on Mars, Abercrombie.
FITCH: I didn’t say it was a difficult hobby, Mike.
RICHARDS: Fair enough. Why don’t you choose the first question?
FITCH: Okay. I’ll take “Shooting Comic Fish in a Barrel” for 100, Mike.
RICHARDS: Okay. (reading card) This producer of a long-running, immensely popular game show chose himself to host it after its immensely popular host died.
FITCH: Oh, I know this one! It’s…umm…no, don’t tell me – oh! It’s – I mean, who is Mike Rich –
RICHARDS: (rips up card) You know what? I don’t like that question. Choose another one.
FITCH: What? Oh, okay. How about…”Shooting Comic Fish in a Barrel” for 200, Mike?
RICHARDS: Sounds good. (reading card) He was chosen to host a long running, immensely popular game show even though it had spent months auditioning many popular celebrities who tested better than he had.
FITCH: Who is Mi –
RICHARDS: Nope. Not that question, either. (rips up card) Choose one more.
FITCH: Are you allowed to do that?
RICHARDS: As long as I stand behind this podium, I am. Choose another question.
FITCH: Fine! I’ll take “Shooting Comic Fish in a Barrel” for 300, Mike.
RICHARDS: (reading card) This new host of a long-running, immensely popular game show was hit with two gender discrimination lawsuits during his time as executive producer of The Price Is Right.
FITCH: You gonna let me answer this one?
RICHARDS: No. (rips up card)
FITCH: (determined) “Shooting Comic Fish in a Barrel” for 400. Mike.
RICHARDS: (reading card) He caught the producers of his long-running, immensely popular game show off-guard when it was reported that he made disparaging remarks about women on his podcast, The Randumb Show.
FITCH: Who –
RICHARDS: Yeah, no. (rips up card) Choose another que –
FITCH: “Shooting Comic Fish in a Barrel” for 500.
RICHARDS: He resigned after one day of taping his first episodes of a long-running, immensely popular game show.
FITCH: (quickly) Who is Mike Richards, Mike?
Richards looks at him, then at the card. Then, throwing the remainder of the cards from the podium over his shoulder, he walks off the set.
SOURCE: Weekends!
[http://www.nobc.com/Weekends/video/play.shtml?mea=227737]
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One Orders Water, The Other Something Ostentatiously Alcoholic
I Leave It To The Reader To Figure Out Which Is Which
Taliban spokesman Zabihullah Mujahid and Donald Trump, Jr. walk into a bar. “You and I have more in common than you might think,” Mujahid says. “For example, the Taliban believe that women should not be allowed to have abortions.”
“It’s true,” Trump, Jr. replies. “Modern conservatives believe that.”
“Ultimately, women must submit themselves to the will of men,” Mujahid continues.
“It’s right there in the Bible,” Trump, Jr. enthusiastically agrees.
“If a woman insists upon her own autonomy, she should be put to death. I’m partial to stoning, myself, but to each his own.”
“Whoa! That’s barbaric! I would never agree to that! What kind of a political party do you think I represent?”
“We have already established what kind of political party you represent,” Mujahid said with a satisfied sip of his drink. “Now, we’re just haggling over details!”
SOURCE: Titters Comedy Club
[http://www.titters.com/info/TittersClubs/ElginClub/elgNowAppearing.cfm]
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