“Wanna go back to my place and see my Venn Diagrams?”
“I find the whole ‘Is light a wave or a particle?’ debate so tired…”
“To how many digits do you know pi?”
“Oh, I was into cellular automata and non-linear, self-replicating, chaotic systems years before anybody else had ever heard of them…”
“An I. M. Pei building is a nice place to visit, but I wouldn’t want to live there.”
“Precipitation patterns seem to be tending towards a strange attractor, don’t they?”
“Read any good late modern, feminist, post-colonial, non-Canonical, environmentally friendly, intertextual books lately?”
“I’ve met Noam Chomsky. He’s shorter than he appears on television, you know.”
“They don’t call me the Human Differential Calculus Machine for nothing!”
“Would you care to join me in an exploration of the failure of Malthusian concepts of population growth and resource depletion to explain the increase in food production which has accompanied the phenomenal increase in the world’s population since the turn of the century? How about a movie?”
“Oh, I never watch television…”
“Has anybody ever told you that you have a beautiful occipital lobe?”
“Honey, when I finished my degree, the university had to shut down the program!”
“I once had a teacher who had an email correspondence with somebody whose mother had a class at the University of Toronto just before a class taught by Marshall McLuhan. He thought McLuhan was brilliant, of course…”
“I’ve made a little wager with my friend over there and, uhh, you wouldn’t happen to know who won the Nobel Prize for Chemistry in 1947, would you?”
“I don’t know if Time’s Arrow can be reversed, but haven’t we met before?”
“I know how to program a VCR.”
“Look. I could tell you that you’re beautiful and I really want to get you back to my place so that I could make love to you, but we’d both know that was a lie. If you come back to my place, all I’m going to do is try to get into your mind. Now, if you’re open to explore the possibilities of that kind of experience, fine. Otherwise, I’m sorry to have wasted your time.”
“Do you believe in love at first sight…in a world of third-order simulations in which the real has disappeared?”
“Oh, I could never date a person who had a degree which wasn’t equal to or greater than my own…”
“Heard the one about the interface designer, the parallel processing architecture researcher and the English major?”
“Of course, it was all downhill for Beethoven after the Fifth Symphony…”
“Oh, I never use IRC…”
“Did you know that the gross national product of the African nation of Ghana is smaller than the number of metric tonnes of carbon monoxide spewed into the air of the world’s six largest cities each and every week?”
“I have an IQ of 178…but I really want to direct.”
“Why is it that men think women will swoon if they boast about their souped-up, Pentium-powered computers?”
“You may not realize it, but we were destined to raise the general level of the gene pool together.”
“I think I’ve found the perfect solution to the Cartesian mind/body split: come home with me tonight and put your body next to my mind…”
“What do you think Aristotle would have thought of Steven Segal?”
“I could never love a person who used an IBM PC.”
“Do you think the government would let me write the cost of a particle accelerator off my taxes as an entertainment expense?”
“Travelling through Paris, I once stayed in a hotel that had a sign that read, ‘Umberto Eco probably slept here.'”
“Wanna get interfaced?”