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Odds and Ends

Modern Love is a Bad Comedy Routine

You’re a few punchlines short of a stand-up routine.
You know what I mean?
You…you’re a couple lawyers short of a defense team.
Yeah, you. You’re a few replacement employees short of a work force.
You hear what I’m saying?
You’re a couple of hazings short of an airborne regiment.
A special prize short of a box of cereal.
A few gross points short of a three picture deal.
Several songs short of a playlist.
A couple of Matisses short of a Barnes.
A few concessions to national industries short of a General Agreement on Tariffs and Trade.
Am I getting through to you?
You’re a couple of bloodsuckers shy of an Anne Rice novel,
A few loopholes short of a tax policy
And several freaks short of an Archaos.

So why do I love you so?

GOOD SIDE BAD SIDE
Kicks Nix
Scoring Boring
Keen Mean
Connective Defective
Okay Pokey
Peak Weak
Sexy Vexy
Righteous Blighteous
Hunky Funky

Information Age of Consent

I want to live in a world
Where people know more about T. S. Eliot than TSN
Where Paradise Lost is better known than “Paradise By the Dashboard Light”
Where people don’t confuse Nietzche’s “superman” with DC’s Superman
Where Archie Rice is a more important cultural figure than Anne Rice
Where Sun Tzu is read more often than the Toronto Sun
Where “Torah! Torah! Torah!” is better known than Tori Amos
Where Martin Luther’s reputation eclipses Martin and Lewis’s
Where people prefer Jean-Luc Goddard to Jean-Luc Picard
Where Mozart is better loved than Moe Berg
Where people care less about the Ottawa Rough Riders than the Washington Freedom Riders

I want to live in a world where what happened yesterday isn’t considered worthless
Just because it happened yesterday

Cyberspace isn’t that world

OUTIE INNIE
the Information Superhighway rolling your own
Apollo 13 Spam
rent due notices low hemlines
the duck-billed platypus the duck billed platypus
paranoia Polyester
Indonesia UNIX
french cooking The Alamo
Wired Whole Earth Catalogue
Charles Mair Yusuf Al-Ibn
Madonna paper clips
ball bearings Crisco shortening
Quebec that’s not funny
saunas the Ebola Virus
Bill Moyers Madonna
primordial ooze aerobicizing to the oldies
McLuhan Innis
being told what’s hip thinking for yourself