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Headlines Shoot Dingoes On Sight

Putin Orders Arrest Of All Statistics


“Statistical analysis supports claims of vote-rigging in Russian election”

Globe and Mail


Ill-considered Headline Sparks PALE FUROR


“SQUEAK, MEMORY
How Art Spiegelman created the work that redefined the way we think about both Holocaust memoirs and the graphic novel”

National Post


The Sheiks Are Adorable When They Stamp Their Little Feet And Shake Their Little Fists


“Arab League demands Syria put end to bloodshed”

Toronto Star


Beautiful Plumage


“The WTO: Not dead, but ‘in a coma'”

Globe and Mail


Christie Blatchford Scared The Shit Out Of Them
They Can Now Be Found In Windsor


“Where have all the manly men gone?
Toronto: city of sissies”

National Post


And, Cool Is Sexy, Right? Right? In Its Own Way?


“Time names Ryan Gosling Coolest Person of the Year”

Toronto Star


Will Make You A Mortgage You Can’t Refuse


“Mafia listed as Italy’s No. 1 ‘bank'”

Globe and Mail


Except You Can’t Toilet Train A Dog
Or, For That Matter, Teach A Baby To Fetch Your Slippers


“Dogs and kids not all that different, study finds”

Toronto Star


Protestors More Concerned About The Bombs He’s Hurling


“Syria’s leader hurls defiance at protesters and the world”

Globe and Mail


Like They Don’t Already Have To Fend Men Off With A…You Know?


“Get a good whiff of this – Axe has spray for women”

Toronto Star


Ah, Yes, I Recall It Well


“Philips recalls light bulbs”

Globe and Mail

“J&J recalls Tylenol Cold Gelcaps”


Globe and Mail

“RIM recalling 1,000 defective PlayBook tablets”


Toronto Star

“Nissan recalling 51,700 Sentras
Problem with battery cable could cause engines to stall; 28,000 Jukes recalled, too”


Toronto Star

“Ford recalls 128,000 sedans”


Toronto Star

“Volkswagen recalls 300,000 diesel cars”


Globe and Mail

“Honda recalls 304,000 vehicles
Air bags may inflate with too much pressure causing death or injury”


Toronto Star

“Ford recalls 450,400 minivans and SUVs


Globe and Mail


Does Christie Blatchford Know About This?


“Even tough men have soft brains”

Globe and Mail


Wow! The Pope Is Really Cracking Down!


“Cardinal Foley recalled for warm heart, humor”

The Delaware County Daily Times


The Shame Resides In Their Failure


“No shame in Canadian junior effort”

Toronto Star


IMF’s Scoffers Remain Stable


“IMF’s coffers keep growing”

Globe and Mail


Woman Of Kleenex, More Like


“Bachmann sees herself as ‘America’s Iron Lady'”

National Post


Somebody’s Unclear On The Concept, Example 327


“Revolutionary ‘gave us democracy'”

Toronto Star


Once Again, We Must Choose Between Those Who Don’t Know And Those Who Are Professionally Misinformed


“Experts, public at odds over economy”

Globe and Mail


Aww! Now You’ve Gone And Spoiled Two Of My Favourite Things!


“HOW COOKIES ARE LIKE SEX”

National Post


Japanese Politicians Dealing With The Crisis Not So Much


“Fukushima plant declared stable”

Toronto Star


Unlikely To Repeat In 2012


“Layton named 2011’s top newsmaker”

Globe and Mail


Bravo! It’s Rare To See A Newspaper’s Bias So Boldly Stated – Well Done!


“U.S. good, Canada bad”

National Post


I Doubt It – He Is A Bear Of Little Bowel Movement, After All


“Could poo help save the High Park zoo?”

Toronto Star


Not Hiring Assholes Might Be A Better Strategy


“RCMP banks on e-learning to instil better habits among officers”

Globe and Mail


Oh! That’s What The Article Is About? I Thought – Well, Never Mind What I Thought!


“WEINER KEENERS
George Karpouzis couldn’t have picked a better spot for his hot dog shop thanks to hungry students from nearby schools

National Post


More Prisons Should Solve That Problem


“Murders at 25-year low”

Toronto Star


Asks: “So, What Is This Social Networking Stuff About, Anyway?”


“New Yahoo CEO seeks to make firm relevant again”

Globe and Mail


He Could Part His Hair On The Other Side, For Instance, Or…Or…Or Wear Plaid!


“Justin Bieber should embrace his badass tendencies”

The Grid


After A Headline Like That, Who Needs To Read The Article?


“Iran says it will fly its own stealth drone
Claims it will reverse-engineer captured U.S. spy plane, a feat that seems far beyond its sanctions-strapped aviation industry”

Globe and Mail


I Know We’re Desperate For Validation, But Really?


“Canadians top for bowel diseases
Global study finds inflammatory illness is more prevalent in industrialized countries”

Toronto Star


Always Have Plenty Of Antacids Close To Hand


“Investing secrets for volatile market”

National Post


Weapons Give Latter The Decisive Edge


“Protest vs. government: Technology gives former the edge”

Globe and Mail


It’s Easier To Keep Her Out Of Mischief That Way


“Future saint died at 24”

Toronto Star


This Is The WRONG Lesson To Be Teaching Kids At Christmas


“Heir may be less popular than his brutal father”

Toronto Star


Vow To Be More Proactive In Ignoring Environmental Disasters


“Spills wake up global regulators”

National Post


Why Do I Feel A My Fair Lady Moment Coming On?


“Spain must turn brain drain into gain”

Globe and Mail


Opponents To Be Thrown Into Jail Cells Gently


“Putin hints at softer approach”

Toronto Star


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