Tucker Carlson Is To Journalism What The Bubonic Plague Is To Public Health
(PRO TIP: Please Don’t Start Praising The Bubonic Plague!)
Carmine Sabia
@CarmineSabia
Wait. Hold on. The White House correspondents dinner is supposed to be celebrating Free Press and they cheer for the firing of Tucker Carlson?
Wait – Did You Just – Oh, No, You Di’int! Oh, Yes, You Did! YOU JUST USED TRUTH AS A VERB!
You Rebel!
Okay, Saying Your Voice Was One Of The Most Important In The Universe Was Pretty Ballsy, Too
Donald J. Trump
@realDonaldTrump
April is the biggest month of Traffic on TRUTH SOCIAL, by far. It has become one of the most important “Voices” in the Universe, because it is my Voice, but the Fake News, most of which is dying, or dead, refuses to report on it, or its relevance. WHEN I TRUTH, IT GOES ALL OVER THE PLACE. REMEMBER THAT, AND WATCH!
I Mean, She’s Going To Hell Anyway, So What Do A Few Extra Years On Earth Matter?
The Intellectualist
@highbrow_nobrow
Montana bill sponsor: I prefer my transgender daughter commit suicide rather than allow her to transition.
– Rep. Kerri Seekins-Crowe
Yeah, Other Than My Family, Friends And Colleagues, I Have Nobody!
@NubianStan
@SihleStan
I’m not saying have children but those of you in your mid 20s to mid 30s flexing about not having or wanting children will live a very lonley life once you hit your mid 40s
It’s Not The Shocker That The Reveal Of Who Luke’s Father Was, But It’s Pretty Good, Too
Mehdi Hasan
@mehdirhasan
“Twitter’s self-reported data shows that, under Musk, the company has complied with hundreds more government orders for censorship or surveillance – especially in countries such as Turkey and India.” Surprise!
The Holy Spirit Is Worth At Least 65 People, Especially On April 15
ProPublica
@propublica
In acquiring church status, the Family Resource Council told the IRS it holds chapel services at its office, averaging 65+ people.
But when we called to inquire about service times, a staffer responded, “We don’t have church service.”
Sorry, But I Always Preferred The Beatles
i newspaper
@theipaper
Swear allegiance out loud to the King if you’re watching on TV, public to be told at Coronation
Is It Possible To Be A Volunteer Incel?
For The Affirmative, EXHIBIT B
Ask Aubry
@ask_aubry
Steven Crowder verbally abused his pregnant wife. And after all this and so much more, he can’t figure out why she filed for divorce.
You…Aren’t A Good Judge Of The Finest People, Are You?
Donald J. Trump
@realDonaldTrump
Mike ‘Pussy’ Pence testified for hours today for traitor DA, Jack Smith. I knew I should have picked Sarah Palin; she knows how to keep her mouth shut.
Are You Sure You Didn’t Just Go Back On Your Meds?
The Gateway Pundit
@gatewaypundit
Whistleblower Who Was Reportedly About to Reveal “Explosive” Information On the Biden Crime Family’s Corruption Has Disappeared
Greek Alphabet Says It Doesn’t Know The Person And Would Prefer Not To Get Involved
Mediate
@Mediate
Caitlyn Jenner Calls For ‘Alpha Male’ Trump to Prevent ‘End’ of United States
Right Wing “Justices” Aren’t About Strengthening The Rule Of Law But Undermining It
Jason Willick
@jawallick
Supreme court ‘ethics’ legislation isn’t about strengthening the legitimacy of the Court but undermining it
I’m 62
I Expect It To Happen Any Time Now
Any Time…
Tell You What: I’ll Get Back To You When It Does
simone!
@parasocialyte
at what point in your twenties do you stop feeling like a 17 year old wearing the costume of an adult
Complaints About People Wearing Masks? That’s So 2018!
Tomi Lahren
@TomiLahren
I personally hope liberals wear masks forever. They think it’s the ultimate flex but really they’re just proudly affixing dirty diapers to their faces as a virtue signal of stupidity.
There Are Any Left?
Florida’s Voice
@FLVoiceNews
Ron DeSantis open to Twitter moving to Florida but tells Elon Musk to not bring “woke” employees with him.
OLD POLL: Small Number Of Extremists Are Why The Rest Of Us Can’t Have Nice Things
The Hill
@thehill
NEW POLL: Most beer drinkers support brands working with transgender spokespeople.
AT The Heart Of Much Humour Is Juxtaposition Of The Absurd
Like Elon Musk And Comedy Criticism
Elon Musk
@elonmusk
The Onion has become jarringly unfunny.
At the heart of humor is a revealed truth, but woke is a lie, so it is humorless.
Bet It Puts Your Dating Life In Perspective!
Don Lewis
@DonLew87
Dude and his date both drive to Texas restaurant. A ‘parking attendant’ charges them $20 each to park. Dude pays for both. Finds out in restaurant he got scammed. Goes back out, shoots and kills the parking guy. Returns to his date. Two days later she turns him in. Texas.
Did You Bite Into The Tie To Ensure That It Was Real?
Gavin Mario Wax
@Gavinwax
I ran into Congressman @Santos4Congress today and I said I liked his tie. He took it off and gave it to me on the spot. A nice Ferragamo tie with elephant print!
What a standup guy!
The Only People Who Believe The Bill Cuts Benefits For Vets Are Those Who Have Actually Read It AND YOU CAN’T TRUST PEOPLE LIKE THAT!
House Republicans
@HouseGOP
House Republicans are NOT going to cut the VA budget.
President Biden and extreme Democrats are continuing to lie and fearmonger about the Limit, Save, Grow Act.
Don’t believe them. Republicans have always prioritized veterans in our budgets.
Turn Them Into Surreal Images?
Racer X
@BSMDBT
West Virginia and coal mining were decimated by…wait for it.. DEMOCRATS. 100%
THIS IS WHAT MIRONIC DEMOCRATS DO TO AMERICA AND AMERICANS.
Did You Establish A Federal Department Of “They” When Nobody Was Looking?
Acyn
@Acyn
Trump: Abraham Lincoln had a civil war going on but Abraham Lincoln was just vilified. Now they say Trump got treated worst of all.
You Really Don’t Want Anybody To Vote Republican In 2024, Do You?
Brigitte Gabriel
@ACTBrigitte
Raise the voting age to 21.
Bring back the draft.
Gen Z is a disaster that requires
emergency correction.