(Everything I Do) I Do It For Me
Bryan Adams was sitting in a bar in Los Angeles when he got the news: his new album, Waking Up the Neighbours did not qualify as Canadian for purposes of…
Deadline News: First, If Not Foremost…
Good evening. Our top story tonight: in an attempt to bolster his faltering campaign, Democratic Presidential hopeful Jerry Brown announced this afternoon that, when he was younger, he did have…
More Trumped Up Charges
A lot of people were surprised that, in the middle of a recession, Canadian banks posted a profit of over $3 billion. There was nothing mysterious about the profit, however,…
Ask Dr. Political Science
Dear Dr. Political Science, How did George Bush get to be known as "The Education President?" Puzzled in Plattsburgh Dear PiP, Politics is full of unfathomable mysteries, the answers to…
Time and the International Monetary Fund
Economic Crisis: 1970 Third World Customer: "We need money." World Bank: "How much?" TWC: "A large amount." WB: "How much?" TWC: "A really large amount." WB: "What do you want…
The Wages of Cynicism Is Mirth
People often assume from the kind of writing they find in my column that I am a desperately unhappy, persistently cynical misanthrope. This is unfair. I daresay I am no…
The Bush Administration’s Policy on the Complicated Issues of AIDS, Abortion and Teenage Pregnancy
Don't have sex. No, really. Don't have sex.
Win A Dream Date With Dan *
Now, for a limited time only and subject to all the usual restrictions, you can win a Dream Date with the Vice President of the United States of America, Dan…
All Good Things Must End Happily Ever After
The mystery had been solved. The bad guys had been vanquished. The moral order had been restored. Jack proposed to Mary, who threw her arms around him and gave him…
Plyin’ Cod
"Och, Angus, havenna seen you in a while." "I been visitin' relations in Lake Erie, Ken." "How's the family?" "Och, I dinna ken the younger generation. Males protectin' the eggs,…
The Green Police
"Nobody move, or the forest gets it!" "Don't do anything crazy!" "Back off, man. I mean it! I've got an axe and a box of matches, and I won't hesitate…
All the Resonance Men
Sometimes, you read something that makes sense of the crazy sensory overload that is life at the end of the twentieth century. A recent article in, of all places, The…