Who killed the economy?
“Not I,” said Worker Lorker. “I put in a fair day’s work, and all I wanted was a decent wage. Sometimes, I had to go on strike to make sure that I got the wages I deserved, but there’s nothing wrong with that – it’s perfectly legal, and, besides, the only ones who got hurt were the Bossie Possies.”
Okay, but who killed the economy?
“Not I,” said Bossie Possie. “I paid the Worker Lorkers a fair wage, but I also had a responsibility to my shareholders to give them a good return on their investment. After all, investors are people who make business possible, and they shouldn’t be disappointed by low dividends. In negotiations with the Worker Lorkers, I was bound by the Board of Directors and company stakeholders. They determined our policy.”
Sure, but who killed the economy?
“Not I,” said Banker Wanker. “We lent money to companies to help them get off the ground and expand their production. In return, all we asked was a small pittance of interest, a trifling sum, really. We had to offer our customers a fair return on their savings, after all, and, of course, we had to cover our own expenses. We have shareholders and a Board of Directors, too, you know.”
Okay, but who killed the economy?
“Not I,” said Governor Hovernor. “I certainly could not interfere with the workings of the marketplace, either for Worker Lorker or Bossie Possie. And, I wasn’t responsible for inflation – oh, goodness me, no. I was against printing all that money, borrowing from other big countries – which, as you know, was partly responsible for creating such a big deficit – and devaluing the currency. I was against it.”
Yes, but who killed the economy?
“Not I,” said Economist Seconomist. “I may have offered the advice that lead to the adoption of the fiscal policies that lead to the current…difficulties. But, the economy was already dying before I came to it. I suggested remedies which may have helped, if they had been taken up immediately and completely and if the problem hadn’t progressed as far as it unfortunately had. But, I was certainly not to blame for the…you know. I’m only an Economist Seconomist, after all; nobody expects us to know anything about how things really work!”
Look, who killed the economy?
“Not I,” said Consumer Vonsumer. “I spent money as fast as I could. When I ran out of money, I borrowed more. There’s nothing wrong with borrowing money – the government does it…did it all the time. Come to think of it, I guess I didn’t need all the things I bought – but, I had an image to keep up. I wanted to be successful, but, more than that, I wanted to look successful. You know?”
I know, but that doesn’t help: who killed the economy?
“Not I,” said Dealer Feeler. “Somebody had to bring together the product and the potential Consumer Vonsumer. Sales is an old and very honourable profession, offering an important service to the economy. For such a service, how much would you be willing to pay?”
Nothing, any more. So, who killed the economy?
“Not I,” said Chicken Little. “But, have you heard? The sky is falling! The sky is falling!”
Please, one crisis at a time. Now, who killed the economy?
“Not I,” said Admannie Gladmannie. “I was only helping Consumer Vonsumer make a more informed choice. All this talk about creating needs for products by appealing to emotions is rubbish. I never pointed a gun to anybody” head and forced them to buy a product they didn’t want. Not that that’s a bad idea – hey, it was just a joke. For crying out loud! Can’t you take a joke?”
A bit defensive, aren’t we, Admannie Gladmannie?
“Not I,” said Admannie Gladmannie.
If you say so. But, who killed the economy?
“Not I,” said Media Nedia. “I just took whatever Admannie Gladmannie gave me. After all, he paid good money for his time and/or space, and he had a right to use it in any way he saw fit. Television, radio and the others do not affect people’s behaviour, and we cannot create Consumer Vonsumers, no matter how much we broadcast the Consumer Vonsumer way of life, or how little we broadcast alternatives. We just mirror society, we don’t create it.”
Hold on a second. Worker Lorker didn’t kill the economy, and Bossie Possie didn’t. Neither did Banker Wanker, Governor Hovernor, Economist Seconomist, Consumer Vonsumer, Admannie, Gladmannie, Dealer Feeler or Media Nedia. Even Chicken Little had nothing to do with it. So, who killed the economy?
Could it be that…society is to blame?