Tell The Truth?
Whoa – Let’s Not Get Crazy, Now!
“What might a desperate Trump do to win again?”
– Toronto Star
Chicken Licken With His Little Environmental Regulation Legulations
“Who killed the Frontier oil sands mine?”
– Globe and Mail
Not Being Able To See The Front Door From The Vestibule Should Be Your First Clue
“How do I know if I’ve become a hoarder?”
– Toronto Star
Yeah, Getting All Misty Eyed And Writing Love Poetry While The Opponent Is Rushing Up-Court Doesn’t Seem Like A Game Winning Strategy
“Have the Raptors taken Canada’s outpouring of love too much to heart?”
– Globe and Mail
You Can’t Get More Cutting Edge Than That
“Should investors take a bet on surgical robotics?”
– Globe and Mail
You Bastards Weren’t Satisfied With Your War On Christmas, Now You’re Starting A War On Easter‽ I Hope The Bunny Bites You On The Ass. Hard!
“What came first, the Christian or the egg?”
– Toronto Star
Can Any Of us Really Escape The Prison Between Our Ears?
“An end to solitary confinement?”
– Globe and Mail
The Knife In Your Back Should Be Your First Clue
“How can you tell if someone is not good for you?”
– Toronto Star
The Part With All The Yelling
Chill, Man – You’ll Live Longer
“WHAT PART OF ‘STAY HOME’ DON’T YOU GET?”
– Toronto Sun
To Be fair, I’ve Only Had Sixty Years To Work On It…
“Is that your craziest conspiracy theory?”
– Toronto Star
Like A Bad Burrito
“You Had Covid-19. Will It Return?”
– New York Times
Twice The Calories, Half As Filling
“When the lockdown eases, what will our new normal be?
– Toronto Star
Their Undying Gratitude
“In a time of climate crisis, what do rich countries owe to the poor?”
– Globe and Mail
He Hasn’t Had A Good Idea Since He Decided To Leave His Diaper On At Daycare
He Was Three
What Do You Think?
“Trump seems to want rates below zero. Is it a good idea?”
– Toronto Star
Shor, Shamus, Shor
“Hey, toots, a little privacy?”
– Toronto Sun
Because At Least The Drugs They Buy With Them Have A Legitimate Medical Purpose
“Why do seniors need more government handouts?”
– Toronto Star
Alfred E. Neuman
“Who is responsible for Internet security?”
– Globe and Mail
Asked And…Kind Of Reasked But Answered At The Same Time
“What if schools aren’t back by fall?”
– Toronto Star
“From the classroom to home: How do you teach kids online?”
– Toronto Star
Yes – They’ve Been Flattening Public Health Care Budgets For Decades
“Do western provinces have an edge in flattening the curve?”
– Toronto Star
Because Of All Of This Talk Of Flattening The Curve – Duh!
“Why do people believe the Earth is flat?”
– Globe and Mail
Could They Be Any More Revol – Naaah! Too Easy!
“Is it time for a backbench revolt?”
– Toronto Star
I Suppose It Could Be Something Else – What Do You Think?
“With gifts, is it really the thought that counts?
– Globe and Mail
I Always Put My Pants On One Arm At A Time
“Just stay calm: Be good to yourself
How do you avoid overload when you have time to do everything?”
– Toronto Star
Insert Establishing Shots Of The Famous Landmarks Of American Cities
“How do you sell Canada to Canadians?”
– Globe and Mail
We Call Them “Speed Physical Deformities” Now
The Term You Used Doesn’t Make ME Calm
“Are speed humps effective at calming traffic?”
– Toronto Star
Responsibility Starts At The Bottom
“Do I have to be on call at work just because I’m the manager?”
– Globe and Mail
An Open Bar On Their Ice Floe
“What do we want for the elderly in these conditions?”
– Toronto Star
Reread H. G. Wells
“How can we wait out the pandemic if time doesn’t pass?”
– Toronto Star
Would That Hurt Your Brains?
“Liberals give rich tax break?”
– Toronto Sun
No, It’s A Piezoelectric Slow Cooking Toothbrush
But It’s Easy To See How You Could Have Made That Mistake…
“‘This is supposed to be the shuttle service?'”
– Toronto Star
If They Are, There’s Always Brett And Bart…
“Beau’s politics a deal-breaker?”
– Toronto Sun
Our Youthful Enthusiasm…And The Curator’s Notes That Accompanied It
“Albright-Knox rebuilds a gallery as a gathering place – but what is lost?”
– Globe and Mail
Print Media Should Really Leave The Cat Puns To The Experts On Twitter And Facebook
“A meow-sterpiece or a giant furball?”
– Toronto Star
Sadly, It Looks Like It’s Catching…
“Are you fur real with this stuff?”
– Toronto Sun