Thank you, Tintin Quarantino, for signing up for The Daily Me. Our search engine has combed the Internet for up to the minute news items that fit the profile you have so painstakingly filled out for us. Then, we weighted the probability that you would be interested in these articles against forms which showed what people with tastes similar to yours have liked reading in the past. And, then, we had mixed feelings about the passing of Queen Elizabeth. Some of us thought that she should be praised for shepherding England through some of its most difficult times (you know, the collapse of empire and all that) with calm and grace. Others felt that she should be condemned for symbolizing British class snobbery and international imperialism, and the world would be better off if the royal family somehow found itself marooned on a desert island with nothing but a lion to keep them company and a hidden trap door to keep them from getting bored. Still others of us (you know who you are, Jeremy!) opined that what we all needed was some ice cream. This had nothing to do with the death of the monarch…or, if truth be told, anything in the news – still others of us always wanted ice cream. It has always been a thing with him.
We must admit, the strawberry ripple really hit the spot.
Enjoy,
The Daily Me Staff
A Booboo De Souffle
Jean-Luc Goddard has died of assisted suicide at the age of 91. What can we say about the legendary French film director? He was born, he lived, he died. But not necessarily in that order.
SOURCE: Obits ‘R Us
[http://www.king.ids.net/~bdlm/obits_r_us.html]
more
Former President And Future Inmate Donald Trump Tells Them Both To Quit It – They’re Taking The Spotlight Away From Him, And He’s Afraid Of The Dark
It’s like a game of keeping up with the Joneses. If both sets of neighbours were sociopaths with the power of a state behind them.
Texas Governor Gregg Abbott sends a busload of immigrants from his state to New York to teach…somebody a lesson about…something.
Sensing a winning political ploy, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis sends a planeload of immigrants from Texas to Massachusetts for more unspecified lessons for unidentified people.
Rumours are now floating around Austin that Governor Abbott is planning on sending a caravan of immigrants directly from Venezuela to the home of President Joe Biden. Lessons to people have been left far behind at this point.
Inhumane? Sure. Illegal? Quite possibly. Immoral? No doubt. But when was the last time you heard anybody talking about the Dobbs decision?
SOURCE: Deadline News Network
[http://www.dnn.com/2022/ALLPOLITICS/09/18/reps.main/index.html]
more
Odds You’re Playing One Right Now: The Sounds And Lights Are Quite Inviting, Aren’t They?
Odds that the “Vegas-style” gambling machines in Ontario bingo halls break a promise OLG made to municipalities that electronic games would not mimic slot machines: even
Odds against the provincial government doing anything about the scandal: 1,000,000 to one
SOURCE: NOW and THEN
[http://www.now&thentoronto.com/news/story.cfm?content=317086]
more
If His Thinking Was Any Deeper, HIS Skin Would Be Translucent
So, the only person who could play Ariel, “from a scientific perspective,” would be the Visible Woman doll?
Honestly! You give a person a show on a far right wing network like The Daily Wire, and suddenly somebody who denied public health science during COVID and climate science since…forever is Albert freaking Einstein when it comes to live action remakes of beloved children’s cartoons.
If he was really interested in a scientific perspective, Matt Walsh might want to explain how half-human, half-fish creatures could exist in the ocean first place. Of course, that would involve a discussion of evolution, also not one of his favourite topics.
That’s quite the thoughtful pose you’ve taken in your Basket photo, Matt. You’re thinking of giving the money you’re being paid to pander to racists and derail serious discussion of issues of importance to the American people to the ACLU to fight discriminatory election laws, aren’t you?
Psych! You’re planning on using the money you’re being paid to pander to racists and derail serious discussion of issues of importance to the American people to buy a second home. Matt. Matt. Matt. Einstein has nothing to worry about: only in the Basket of Deplorables is culture wars nonsense considered deep thinking.
SOURCE: Karl’s Big Red Web Page of Unreconstructed Marxism
[http://www.bigred.commie/articles/218^.htm]
more
On The Well-Established Legal Principle That Once You Start A Eulogy, Anybody Who Dies While You’re Speaking Is Fair Game
Kenneth Starr, a former federal appellate judge whose interminable criminal investigation of Bill Clinton led to the president’s impeachment, has died at the age of 76. The funeral, which is scheduled for Tuesday afternoon, could last for several years and involve mourning for several people who were not originally the targets of the service.
SOURCE: Obits ‘R Us
[http://www.king.ids.net/~bdlm/obits_r_us.html]
more
When The British First Landed, Indian Natives Were Living In Huts And Subsisting On A Diet Of Berries And Grubs; They Spoke To Each Other in Grunts And Worshipped Rabbits –
It’s Not Like They Already Had A Culture That Had Developed Over Millennia…
“When the British pulled out of India they left behind an entire civilization, a language, a legal system, schools, churches and public buildings, all of which are still in use today.”
– Fox News doucheanchor Tucker Carlson extolling the virtues of colonialism
SOURCE: No Comment Quotes
[http://thesepeopleareinsane.psy/update.toshtml]
more
If The Alert Had Been Any More Vague, It Could Have Been A Liberal Press Release About Climate Change
AMBER ALERT! AMBER ALERT! AMBER ALERT! AMBER ALERT! AMBER ALERT!
At 3:47 am, something bad happened to somebody somewhere in the province. Peel Regional Police say that illegal firearms may or may not have been involved, and that the perpetrator or perpetrators might be travelling in a stolen vehicle. If they aren’t on public transit. Or walking. Citizens are asked not to panic, but to be vigilant, and to alert the Ontario Provincial Police if they see, hear or smell anything suspicious.
SOURCE: The Smoking Gut
[http://www.thesmokinggut.com/archive/108096382861023470563-7946374864826327230173072840-473418378150637420952-3794147940736139500-038962738cahs01.html]
more
To Underscore The Inhumanity, Each Refugee Was Given A Cruller When They Got Off The Plane
Fox News. America’s Cruellest Practical Jokes. All day, every day.
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis promises immigrants from Venezuela that if they just get on a plane they will be taken to a place where they will be given good jobs. Hee hee. Actually, the plane takes them to Martha’s Vineyard two days after tourist season ends and the jobs have dried up. If that isn’t funny enough, most of the immigrants were in Texas and had to be bused into Florida before they could be sent to another state. What makes it even funnier is that nobody at Martha’s Vineyard is given advance notice; the confusion on their faces as residents give the immigrants food and shelter is priceless. But the funniest part? The immigrants are mostly asylum seekers who are in the country legally! Practical jokes don’t get any funnier!
SOURCE: Ukrainian TV Guide
[http://www.tvguide.ua/listings/index.asp?referrerID=0&returnurl=%2Flistings%2Findex%2Easp%3F®Mode=0]
more