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The Fireworks In The Back Rooms Are More Interesting Than Those On The Field
The fact that the town of Kenora has moved its annual fireworks celebration from Canada Day, July 1st, to American Independence Day, July 4th, has nothing to do with politics. “When Canada Day falls on a weekend, the event makes money,” explained Marc Bissonnette, one of the event’s organizers. “On a weekday, it loses money.”
Since the Canadian government has many powers, but changing a Wednesday to a Saturday isn’t one of them, Kenora decided to move the day of its fireworks. It’s about money, not patriotism. Somewhere, Ayn Rand is shedding a tear of joy.
SOURCE: Canada: Still A Country?
[http://www.irritationnation.ca/whattolookat.asp?ID=258423574-7/]
He Had The Biggest Nose In Show Business (And That’s Nothing To Sneeze At!)
Veteran Hollywood actor Karl Malden has died at the age of 97. Star of such films as A Streetcar Named Desire and On the Waterfront, as well as the television series The Streets of San Francisco, Malden –
MICHAEL JACKSON ALERT! MICHAEL JACKSON ALERT! He is not the biological father of his three children, but the surrogate who carried two of them is also not the biological mother AND NEITHER OF THEM FILED OFFICIAL ADOPTION PAPERS!
Umm, how long are you going to milk the Michael Jackson thing? Because, you know, other celebrities are dying. Jan Rubes, for instance, who starred in such films as Witness and The Outside Chance of Maximilian Glick, died at the age of –
Oh, Michael Jackson’s death will take precedence over everything else for a very long time. If I was a celebrity, I wouldn’t plan on dying until at least the middle of next year.
SOURCE: Obits ‘R Us
[http://www.king.ids.net/~bdlm/obits_r_us.html]
Iggy Flips His Wiggy
Even opposition leaders settle.
YOU WANT: enhancements to Employment Insurance in time for the summer, a roadmap for eliminating the deficit, a plan for addressing the isotope crisis and a transparent accounting of infrastructure spending. YOU’LL SETTLE FOR: minor modifications to Employment Insurance by the end of the year, some ideas for eliminating the deficit and acknowledgement of the isotope crisis. YOU’LL GET: a panel to study Employment Insurance and a promise of an economic update from the government in the fall.
SOURCE: Les Pages aux Folles
[http://www.lespagesauxfolles.ca]
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Madoff Takes It On The Chin
Bernard Madoff, who swindled investors out of as much as $50 billion, has been sentenced to 150 years in prison. This means that he will be in prison until he is 221 years old. Given time served awaiting trial, he will get out of jail when he is…220 years old. Of course, if he gets time off for good behaviour, he may be released at a sprightly 171 years young.
“You may laugh,” US District Judge Denny Chin commented, “but we will be tracking Madoff through his future lives. We have already set up containment facilities if he is reincarnated as an ant, a warthog or a zebra. We have been given tremendous technical support from the keepers at the San Diego Zoo – now, there’s people who really believe in justice!”
SOURCE: The Financial Riposte
[http://www.canada.com/national/nationalwhippingpost/financialriposte/story.html?id=73ddccd7-f6f3-4f4f-9f25-a2eb4cc6a526]
I Thought The Whole Point Of Work Was To Get Away From Your Family!
Canada’s freedom of information ombudsman, Robert Marleau, has resigned halfway into his term, saying he was ready to leave “to spend more time with family.” Does anybody actually believe that? Everybody in Ottawa knows that he was unpopular because when he was first hired, he was told that the Conservative government wanted more transparency, and for some reason he actually believed them.
Then there’s Robert Petit, a Canadian lawyer who has quit the Cambodian prosecution of suspected Khmer Rouge war criminals, citing “personal and family reasons.” Frustration at problems with the way the tribunals were run had nothing to do with his resignation. And, you can believe that because of Cambodia’s avowed policy of governmental transparency.
Can we please agree to find a different diplomatic cover story for people who don’t want to admit the real reason they quit their jobs? I’m sure there are decent people who quit their jobs because they really do want to spend time with their families – probably – maybe a few -somewhere – and, anyway, if there are, this is casting a terrible shadow on them!
SOURCE: Focus Against the Family
[http://www.jackedinonline.com/ratingssystems/ratingssystems/a0002446.cfm]
An Eighties Flashback We Could All Do Without (As If There’s Any Other Kind…)
The United Nations, the Organization of American States and many world leaders have condemned the military ouster of Manuel Zelaya, the democratically elected president of Honduras.
Nobody is suggesting that this could be the start of another round of military coups in countries in the region. However, many Latin American leaders are checking airplane schedules and looking for countries that grant asylum to foreign leaders just in case.
SOURCE: Disassociated Press
[http://www.bltdaily.com/]
And, The Oscar For Most Chutzpah In An Industry Supporting Role Goes To…
The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences has announced that it will be expanding the Best Picture category to 25 films. “When we only had 20 entrants,” Academy President Shia Labeouf stated, “we found that worthy films were falling through the cracks. “Worthy” films that didn’t make the cut last year included: Indiana Jones and the Temple of Geritol, Woody Allen’s latest film Futility, and Transformers XVII: They’ve Fallen and They Can’t Get Up.
When a reporter asked Labeouf if this wasn’t just a ploy to allow more films to advertise that they are Best Picture contenders, he responded, “Of course. The Oscars have always been about marketing Hollywood movies. Where have you been?”
SOURCE: Imaginary Movie Database
[http://www.imd.com/title/tt0708325/]
The Evolution Of Revolution
@iranobserver (11:23:47): gunfire & explosions & screams, oh my! but, wqhatever the government does, it will not stop the revol
@iranobserver (11:24:16): I’M HIOT! I’M HIT! I’ve been shot! WTF?
@iranobserver (11:26:02): my blood is running through gutter getting too weak to type
@iranobserver (11:32:42): thyangs going blac. maybe b better if i had tweeted more
SOURCE: Drew’s Transcript-o-rama
[http://www.transcript-o-rama.com/therevolutionwillnotbeohshit.shtml]