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Prisoner? Does Patrick McGoohan Know About This?
LENO: So, about your plans for Iraq…?
MCCAIN: Did I mention that I was a prisoner of war during Vietnam?
LENO: As a matter of fact… Did you want to address the country’s economic problems?
MCCAIN: For over five years. I was held in a hut in the jungle.
LENO: I see. Now, Senator a lot has been made of how many houses your family owns –
MCCAIN: POW…Vietnam…five years?
LENO: What about allegations that you heard the questions Barack Obama was asked at the Saddleback Church before you went on stage and answered them?
MCCAIN: What about the fact that I was tortured? You know, when I was a POW? In Vietnam?
LENO: Thanks for clearing that up for us. I think our viewers now have a better idea of where you stand on the issues. One final question, Senator: how are you enjoying your stay in New York?
MCCAIN: DAMMIT! WHAT PART OF PRISONER OF WAR DON’t YOU UNDER – oh. New York. I, uhh, I always enjoy being here.
SOURCE: Drew’s Transcript-o-rama
[http://www.transcript-o-rama.com/markofmccain.shtml]
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Makes A Change From The Message That Fashion Is Launderable
“Tide’s new spin cycle: Laundry is fashionable”
– Globe and Mail
SOURCE: Billy-Bob’s International House O’ Headlines
[http://www.com/lol.pdqfc.wwygw.wyswyg/fid=1366532458]
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Does This Bailout Make My Fannie Mae Look Fat?
American mortgage financing company Fannie Mae announced that it would be replacing its top managers to help deal with massive losses owing to the company’s suspect lending practices. And, why not? Look how much changing coaches has done for the Toronto Maple Leafs.
SOURCE: The Financial Riposte
[http://www.canada.com/national/nationalwhippingpost/financialriposte/story.html?id=47ddbbd7-f6f3-4f4f-9f25-a2rb4cc6a568]
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Space Is Sexy
Saturday. 9pm. Global. 90210: The Next Generation. Spoiled teens from Beverly Hills explore the galaxy in a starship paid for by their parents. Tonight: Captain Annie wonders if she can wear dress mauves when doing battle with The Borg, or if she should stick with a more traditional black uniform.
SOURCE: Ukrainian TV Guide
[http://www.tvguide.ua/listings/index.asp?referrerID=0&returnurl=%2Flistings%2Findex%2Easp%3F®Mode=0]
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Making People Forget About The Teapot Dome Scandal – How’s That For A Legacy?
vile Republicans) Michelle Obama gave a moving speech about her life at the Democratic National Convention. How will the Conservative spin machine make this into a negative?
a) the Obamas are obviously elitist – unlike most people from broken homes or poor backgrounds, they actually became successful!
b) Michelle Obama clearly loves her daughters…a little too much, if you ask me…
c) it was a very politically calculating speech – and presidential nominating conventions are no place for that!
vile Republicans + servile press) What will George W. Bush’s Presidential legacy be?
a) he didn’t throw up on any world leaders (in fact, he always tried to be helpful to them – like giving them back rubs)
b) he may have bankrupted the country, but at least he was the kind of guy who would go out with you for a beer after and explain why it was for your own good
c) making Warren G. Harding look good by comparison
SOURCE: Les Pages aux Folles
[http://www.lespagesauxfolles.ca]
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Do You Think – As Silly As It May Sound – That They Actually…Want An Election?
Prime Minister Stephen Harper has threatened to call a snap election if Liberal leader Stephane Dion does not agree to meet with him before September 8. The Conservatives have put several additional conditions on the meeting, including: Dion must enter the room on his knees; he must call Harper “Sire,” and; Dion must kill a wild boar with his bare hands and bring Harper the head and entrails.
The Liberals are currently considering the proposal.
SOURCE: Glob and Maul
[http://www.globandmaul.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20080825.eladvote0825_@/BNStory/newsElectoralCatastrophe2008/]
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Proving The Marketing 101 Axiom That Killing Your Customers Is Bad For Business
“Investors bail on Maple Leaf
As death toll mounts, shares in dominant meat producer plunge”
– Globe and Mail
SOURCE: Billy-Bob’s International House O’ Headlines
[http://www.com/lol.pdqfc.wwygw.wyswyg/fid=1368342288]
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If They Tell Two Friends, And They Tell Two Friends, And So On, And So On…It Won’t Help Before 2078
According to the overnight Neilsen ratings, 38 million people watched the Democratic national convention on the night Barack Obama gave his speech accepting the party’s presidential nomination. This may not bode well for the Democrats, however, since only 12 of those people were Americans.
SOURCE: Entertainment Right Now
[http://www.entertainmentrightnow.com/mini/smug2008/2008/08/29/theworldspresident/]
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And, You Thought You Had A Tough Time Playing Hide And Seek With Specialty Channels – Imagine How Their Owners Feel!
The CRTC has placed Shaw Communications on probation, only renewing its operating licences for two years. The government regulator took this drastic step in response to the cable company doing things like putting more commercials on its community channels than it is allowed and dropping or reassigning channels to other spots on the dial without telling them.
Should Shaw continue in this vein, it will be placed on double probation. If that doesn’t deter it, the CRTC could put it on super double probation. If that doesn’t work, the CRTC has the option of moving to code red super double probation. If Shaw insists upon its miscreant behaviour in the face of this regulatory onslaught, the CRTC would then move to code red super doubleplus triple probation.
“Nobody actually knows what code red super doubleplus triple probation actually, you know, means,” admitted CRTC Vice-chair Michel Arpin. “But, it sounds serious, like we really mean business, boy, and it would only take 23 years before it was invoked, so, Shaw better…stop messing around, I tell you!”
SOURCE: Payback
[http:www.paybackmag.com/articles/magazine/20080825/canadiancontent?ohShawAgain.html]
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Oh. Yeah. We Really Dodged A Bullet There, Boy. Sure, We Did…
The Harper government lobbied the United States to accept Canada’s more lenient standards to prevent listeria. Not content with killing its own citizens through inaction, the Conservative government seems intent on killing citizens of a close ally.
Fortunately, the conservative government of George W. Bush had perfected its own methods of killing its citizens through inaction, and the Conservative move did not negatively affect relations between the two countries.
SOURCE: Toronto Startle
[http://www.thestartle.com/NASApp/cs/ContentServer?pagename=thestartle/
Layout/Article_Type1&c=Article&cid=1088591836513&call_pageid=964335278492&col=967286972154]
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