Society says: respect and fear all authority.
Good.
Society says: all men will be five 11 to six three, blond, blue-eyed, tanned and muscular and have perfect teeth, no body odour and no blemishes or distinguishing marks.
Society says: all women will be five five to five ten, blond, blue-eyed and tanned and have a proportionate figure (although large breasts are acceptable), perfect teeth, no body odour and no facial or underarm hair.
Be different! Oops – sorry, Jeff, Tina…Ira and Truman. I didn’t say Society Says. Tee hee. Society Says: you’re out.
Society Says: conform to my standards.
Society Says: men must earn enough money to support a family.
Society Says: wealth is an indicator of male success.
Society Says: women must bear children and raise a family. No…Bruce, you’re not allowed to raise a family. No…now, stop that! That’s very unmasculine, Bruce. Society Says: you’re out!
Society Says: women are the objects of men’s sexual desires.
Society Says: in all other respects, the wishes of women will be subordinate to the wishes of men, except when the family is threatened.
Society Says: the family is all-important.
Society Says: Society must be perpetuated. Now, Monika, I recognize that a movement for the liberation of women exists, but you must appreciate that the prevailing societal opinion is still predominantly conservative. If you insist upon your radical views… Society Says: you’re out.
Society Says: minorities are to be tolerated until they threaten Society, at which point they must be repressed, ruthlessly, if necessary.
Society Says: life isn’t always fair.
Having fun so far, boys and girls? You know, it isn’t often that we get to play like this. You usually have to learn the rules of the game by watching your parents, your friends, your older brother and everybody else you know play it. And, then, just when you think you understand it all, I’ll change the rules on you.
Give women slightly better jobs! Good – nobody was caught.
Society Says: give women slightly better jobs.
Society Says: change comes slowly, with great sacrifice.
Okay, we’ve been doing pretty good so far. Now, let’s speed up the game. Society Says: be moral and do the right thing.
Society Says: morality is subjective and it is hard to always know what the right thing to do is.
So, Society Says: don’t allow morality to get in the way of what’s best for Society.
Society Says: the individual is important, but wealth and privilege don’t hurt, either. So, Society Says: don’t let morality get in the way of your acquisition of material things.
Oh, no! Julio, Charlie, Edgar; robbing that liquor store was definitely wrong. Boy, are you out – for life if that manager dies.
What? Chemical Canada is dumping toxic waste into Lake Ontario, threatening the lives of thousands of innocent people? Well, it will have to be proven in a court of law before I can throw anybody our of the game.
Society Says: I reserve the right to judge who is worthy and who is not.
Society Says: corporations are a lot like Society: responsibility is difficult to attribute to any single person or group of individuals because the decision-making process is so complex and difficult to follow.
Society Says: if you don’t understand, watch television.
Society Says: if television doesn’t give you a satisfactory escape, smoke, drink or use drugs. Then watch television. Jack, Society Says: you’re out. And, that goes for anybody else who runs somebody over while under the influence and gets caught.
Society Says: vices are not acceptable if taken to extremes.
Society Says: insanity, the ultimate escape, is acceptable as long as one remains a productive member of Society. Sam, Neil, Jordan, Joanne, Annette, Ruth, Leon, Eric, Erin, Joseph, Josephine, Ted, Albert, Society Says: you’re all out. Now, who’s left?
Ah, you. Finish reading this column.
Society Says: you’re out!