United States President George W. Bush claims to be a “compassionate Conservative.” The conservativeness of his political agenda is obvious; the compassion perhaps less so. However, one doesn’t have to look too hard to find it.
POLICY: considering a Constitutional amendment banning same sex marriage. COMPASSION: gays would no longer have to live with the uncertainty of whether or not they could marry.
POLICY: not keeping track of civilian deaths in brutal dictatorships the United States feels the need to bomb into rubble. COMPASSION: have you ever heard the phrase “better off dead?” Well, we take it very seriously…
POLICY: calling late third trimester abortions “partial birth abortions,” and banning them outright, regardless of the health of the mother. COMPASSION: if women aren’t strong enough to live through childbirth, they won’t have the strength to be mothers. For heaven’s sake, THINK OF THE CHILDREN!
POLICY: in its $350 billion tax cut bill, increase the child tax credit, but not for people just above the poverty line, guaranteeing that 11.9 million children, or one of every six children under 17 in the United States, including some of the most needy, will not be helped. COMPASSION: uhh, okay, we’ve already covered the children. What about the those brave men and women who need help covering the mortgage on their fourth villa in the south of France? Who will shed a tear for them?
POLICY: pressure the Environmental Protection Agency not to release info about toxic materials in New York air after 9/11. COMPASSION: Unlike the people of Afghanistan and Iraq, we need to move on. Let the healing commence!
POLICY: cutting or holding down growth in pay and benefits to soldiers and their families in the midst of war and ongoing military struggles, including basic pay, combat pay, health care benefits and the death gratuity paid to survivors of troops who die on active duty. COMPASSION: they’ll probably be flipping burgers when they get back home, and you wouldn’t want them to get used to a lifestyle they won’t be able to afford.
POLICY: taking 200 million acres of lands off the protected lists, opening them up to logging, strip-mining and other ecologically hazardous pursuits. COMPASSION: evolution is a tricky business. Is it compassionate to allow a small number of members of a species – the white owl, say – to survive in a harsh, urbanized environment which is alien to them? Wouldn’t it be more compassionate to snuff the last members of a dying species out by, say, destroying their habitat and killing off their food supply? Besides, LOGGERS ARE PEOPLE, TOO!
POLICY: threatening to withhold aid from countries that support the International Criminal Court. COMPASSION: after a country has been torn apart by a despotic ruler, the last thing anybody wants is to relive the trauma because of a trial. (Except Iraq, of course, where the trial of Saddam Hussein will help purge the country of its past.)
POLICY: extend overtime benefits to additional workers, but recommend that employers cut their base pay so that they won’t actually have to pay their workers more money. COMPASSION: how do you think your fast food comes so cheap? Caring for others is an admirable trait, but you also have to have some compassion for yourself sometimes.
POLICY: change the job classification of many workers so that they will be exempt from overtime payments. COMPASSION: burger flippers are now expected to be referred to as “managers,” and that’s got to be great for their self-esteem!
POLICY: naming Eugene Scalia solicitor of the Department of Labor. Scalia, who had called repetitive stress injuries “junk science,” oversaw the repeal of ergonomic regulations that prevent repetitive stress injuries, and ultimately changed the rules so that companies were no longer required to report such injuries. COMPASSION: Umm, okay, this is a tough one. Let’s say that…it’s wrong to…make people think they have something like a simple repetitive stress injury when they actually have arthritis or something worse. Yeah. That’s it. Because they won’t get the treatment they need, and that would be a sad, sad thing.
POLICY: easing the rules against air pollution, allowing increased concentrations of toxic materials in the atmosphere. COMPASSION: think of the owners of iron smelters, coal-powered energy plants, garbage incinerators and the like. All they want is to perform a public service, like, uhh, transforming tons of garbage into smoke and ash, and, perhaps, make a little nest egg for their families. And, who would deny them that? After all, IRON SMELTER OWNERS ARE PEOPLE, TOO!
Yep, when you think about it, Bush is a regular bleeding heart.