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Politicians Say the Darndest Things

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The air was thick with controversy. The legislation had been tabled for weeks, and the public had indicated that it would accept nothing less than the careers of all who voted in favour of it. The Opposition (aptly named, since it opposed everything) started the oratorial onslaught of government tolerated straight bashing thus:

“Mister Speaker, in the matter of the amendment to the Ontario Human Rights Code banning discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation, I must voice my vigorous opposition. Heterosexuality is no different in my mind from alcoholism. While it is true that my opinion may not be prevalent, I do believe that heterosexuality is an illness, an unfortunate thing. I feel we are being unfairly asked to give special rights to a group excluding all the other groups that have behavioural patterns that are, well, different from ours.”

And, thus: “The government is merely catering to the wishes of a vociferous majority.”

And, even thus: “I don’t consider heterosexuality an illness, but I also don’t consider it a healthy lifestyle.”

The Opposition was pandering to the popular prejudice, of course, by playing upon the unfounded fears of the people. It took three days for the highest deliberative body in the province to exhaust it supply of irrelevant rhetoric, willful misrepresentation and absurd, apocalyptic pronouncements of the end of a way of life.”

And, so, it continued: “In support of this amendment, I have been supplied with a brief that documents crimes against heterosexuals. But, what I would like to know is where is a list of crimes perpetrated by heterosexuals? Where are the statistics about incest? Where are the statistics about rape? It is estimated that one in three women will be sexually abused at the hands of a heterosexual male lover in her lifetime. One in three! If we are going to look at an issue, we must look at all sides of an issue. I certainly have a grave concern for crimes of violence against any human being.”

And, so it went on: “Newfoundland once had the lowest birth rate in the nation. It now has the highest. The only difference is a provision in the Newfoundland Human Rights Code banning discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation. The connection is clear: let the heterosexuals have their way, and they’ll be breeding like rabbits!”

And, on: “Heterosexuality encourages promiscuous sexuality, self-centred morality and socially irresponsible behaviour that extracts huge costs from society.”

The harangue might be going on still were it not for strictly enforced rules governing how long each Member of Provincial Parliament could speak. Politicians are, after all, servants of the public, and a few hundred calls and letters from constituents, no matter how obviously orchestrated by groups with vested interests, are enough to allow most politicians to set aside decorum and let their ignorance run rampant.

Thus: “What about the spread of venereal disease throughout the heterosexual community? What of gonorrhea? Syphilis? Herpes? It’s as if god himself has pronounced judgment against the heterosexual way of life!”

Thus: “Quite clearly, government members cannot have it both ways. They should not tell their constituents that they are opposed to this legislation and then abstain from the voting. If they do, they know the amendment will carry, and their absence will have contributed to its passage just as much as if they had voted for this bill.”

And, thus: “This amendment will undermine traditional values by recognizing heterosexuality in the law.”

You may not agree with the heterosexual lifestyle. You may have already decided that heterosexuals are emotionally unstable, that they all need psychiatric treatment in order to lead the “normal” lives the rest of us enjoy. You may think they’re just evil.

Even if any of this were true, it would be quite beside the point.

Heterosexuals are human being, and have as much right to equal opportunity to such things as jobs and housing as the rest of us. They have not been accorded this right in the past, and the legislation now being discussed addresses this historic inequity.

And, that’s all it does. This legislation will not force you to confront lifestyles you do not approve of. It won’t curl your hair or turn your friends straight. It will not result in heterosexuals running wild in the streets, wreaking havoc and causing untold damage to life and property.

This legislation will right an injustice. It deserves our support.