The Three Musk-o-tears
All Accounts With Over 10000 Verified Subscribers Will Get A Lollipop
And Accounts With Over 50000 Will Get A Pony
Elon Musk
@elonmusk
Going forward, all X accounts with 2500 verified followers will get Premium features for free and accounts with over 5000 will get Premium+ for free
Especially Not When We’ve Almost Perfected Racism And Sexism Against “Black Women”
Elon Musk
@elonmusk
It should not be acceptable for any company in the gaming industry to be racist & sexist against “white guys”
They’re So Much Easier To Monetize Than Strangers
Elon Musk
@elonmuks
Nothing more precious than old friends
Technophiles Have Been Saying That AI Would Become Conscious In The Next Decade For The Last 70 Years
CONGRATULATIONS! You’ve Just Volunteered To Be The Latest Roadkill On The Timeline
Elon Musk
@elonmusk
AI will probably be smarter than any single human next year. By 2029, AI is probably smarter than all humans combined.
The Umpteen Trumps
It’s A Short Water Slide Trip From Your Heart And Soul To Trump’s Legal Defence Fund
Your Money Will Enjoy Every Second Of It
Charlie Sykes
@SykesCharlie
NOT A PARODY: “Former President Donald Trump celebrating Easter – the holiday commemorating the Resurrection of the Christian Messiah, Jesus Christ – by hawking copies of his new product, the God Bless the U.S.A. Bible, with singer Lee Greenwood, insisting that supporters buy it for the sake of their hearts and souls.”
We Don’t Want To Do It, But It’s In The Trump Bible – The Book Of Bloodbathicus – So We Have To Do It
We’re On A Mission From God
Republicans against Trump
@RpsAgainstTrump
Donald Trump’s dinner guest at Mar-a-Lago Nick Fuentes says that when the American First movement takes power, all non-Christians will be executed: “They must be absolutely annihilated when we take power.”
Chinese Cars Will Be Shot, Hung, Burned And Drawn And Quartered
Because THAT’S A Normal Thing For A President To Say
Acyn
@Acyn
Trump: Now, if I don’t get elected, it’s gonna be a bloodbath. It’s going to be a bloodbath for the country.
Clearly, I’m Not Screaming “But Context” Loud Enough, Trump Thinks
Mehdi Hasan
@mehdirhasan
Call me crazy but if you have incited an armed mob, echoed the rhetoric of mass shooters and Hitler himself, and praised Nazis, you don’t get to use the word ‘bloodbath’ and then scream ‘but context!’
Because They Want To Remain Billionaires
Mark R. Levin
@marklevinshow
Why are there no Republican multi-billionaires offering to lend President Trump the funds to file his appeal in the outrageous case in NY state? Are none of them liquid enough to help or join with others to help? This is an outrage.
Of Course Not – That Would Be Petty
Rick Wilson
@TheRickWilson
So I’m wondering if DeSantis pushed to release the Florida records of the Jeffrey Epstein file just to harm @realdonaldtrump.
We Are Not Sheep!
Eep!
Eep!
Eep!
Angry Staffer
@Angry_Staffer
Watching the entire GOP media apparatus screech “he was talking about the auto industry!!” in unison while calling all of us sheep is something
The American Automobile Industry Will Implode Due To Chinese Imports?
John Fugelsang
@JohnFugelsang
YOU LIBS BETTER STOP LYING ABOUT TRUMP SUPPORTING VIOLENCE OR YOU WILL NOT LIKE WHAT HAPPENS
Have You Ever Met Donald Trump?
Aaron Astor
@AstorAaron
If he wins the appeal he gets those assets returned. But he has to post those assets as bond while appealing. That’s the law. Does he think he should be given special treatment?
Unfortunately, There’s No Point In Closing The Barn Door Once The Stable Genius Has Bolted
Aaron Rupar
@atrupar
“We’ll bring crime back to law and order” – Trump
Acyn
@Acyn
Trump: You can’t have an election in the middle of a political season
Americans Celebrate The Strangest-Ass Things
Rick Wilson
@TheRickWilson
Good morning, and happy Trump is a Broke-Ass Fraud Day, to those who celebrate.
The Uncounted Everybody Else
But Are Any Of The Voices In Her Head Engineers?
Ron Filipkowski
@RonFilipkowski
Lara Logan says she has inside sources who told her the bridge disaster was a terrorist attack.
Therefore, To Eradicate Hamas, Netanyahu Has To Bomb His Own Office
Haaretz.com
@haaretzcom
“Anyone who wants to thwart the establishment of a Palestinian state has to support bolstering Hamas and transferring money to Hamas,” Netanyahu told his Likud party’s Knesset members in March 2019. “This is part of our strategy”
You’re Obviously Not A Political Scientist, Either
Charlotte Clymer
@cmclymer
Yeah, granted, I’m not an engineer, so forgive my lack of technical expertise on this, but I’m pretty sure it was the cargo ship colliding with the Baltimore bridge on video that made it collapse, not Secretary Buttigieg.
As Usual, He Puts His Finger On What’s Really Important
Ron Filpkowski
@RonFilipkowski
Joe Rogan says he shook hands with Trump at the UFC fight and he doesn’t have small hands like everyone says.
Fox “News” Viewers Shrug And Say, “Who Can Tell Black Lawyers Apart?”
Acyn
@Acyn
Ingraham: Now a note about a graphic we showed at the top of the show. It was supposed to be Fani Willis and Nathan Wade but accidentally we broadcast Terence Bradley. That was obviously not intentional. We made a mistake and we are sorry for that.
[UNPRINTABLE]
Republicans against Trump
@RpsAgainstTrump
Describe Marjorie Taylor Greene in ONE word
Jared Kushner Could Be The Victim Of The Worst Case Of Buyer’s Remorse In History!
PoliticsVideoChannel
@politvidchannel
The Saudi crown prince suggested the $2billion could be returned if Trump loses the 2024 Election.
Not In A Family Publication…
Jon Cooper
@joncoopertweets
Now that Candace Owens has been fired by The Daily Wire, can you recommend a new line of work for her?
Irony Could Use A Valium
Ron Filipkowski
@RonFilipkowski
Jim Jordan is actually chairing a congressional hearing right now on locker room safety.
This is really happening.
To Questions Like: Why Did My Girlfriend Clean Out Our Joint Bank Account And Disappear?
I Think You May Be Overselling The Whole Bridge Conspiracy A Bit…
Catturd
@catturd2
Ask why they’re hiding the name of the captain who hit the bridge – and you’ll find all the answers.
Moscow – Now THERE’S An Investment Opportunity!
Acyn
@Acyn
O’Leary: Would I put money in New York? NEVER! This is not America! This is Venezuela! This is Cuba!