After Decades, Newspaper Finally Gets In Touch With Reality
“Stock markets are out of touch with reality”
– Globe and Mail
International Law And The United Nations
“Trudeau sides with Israel’s enemies”
– Toronto Sun
So, We Should Go Back In Time And Kill The Person Who Created Vaping Before He Gets The Chance?
“Banning e-cigarettes not enough to curb youth vaping: study”
– Globe and Mail
Cause, Meet Effect
“Oshawa woman’s gargoyle found”
– Toronto Star
“Pooping pigeons settle at hotel”
– Toronto Star
Newspaper Is An Equal Opportunity Adviser
“How Ottawa can reach out to the West”
– Globe and Mail
“Conservatives need a leader from Quebec”
– Globe and Mail
Should I Wait Two Minutes To Post It On Instagram, Or Put It Up Right Away?
“Mysterious photo invites ethical question”
– Toronto Sun
Hey! If They Want To Be In Front Of Me In The Unemployment Line, Good Luck To Them!
It’s Not Like I Have Anything Better To Do With My Day…
“Self-checkouts are here to stay, but we can’t leave workers behind”
– Globe and Mail
Mosquito Named Osama Bin Laden Bites 50 In Bloodletting Spree – And Your Point Is?
“Elephant named Osama bin Laden tramples 5 villagers to death”
– Toronto Sun
Some Amateurs Have Already Heard Too Much
“Some experts want more from federal leaders on foreign policy”
– Globe and Mail
I Heard Somewhere That If You Try Sometimes, You Get What You Need…
“TTC wants to charge for congestion
Fees would let it recover costs of adding vehicles to compensate for lane closures”
– Toronto Star
“Full-day kindergarten keeps women working
If Ontario really wants to create jobs, it should leave in tact a system that leads to an active maternal labour force”
– Globe and Mail
“MPPs want province to take over hospital”
– Toronto Star
“Top doc wants calories on menus”
– Toronto Star
“Kim K wants to end California’s death penalty”
– Toronto Sun
“Councillor wants pads, tampons for the homeless”
– Toronto Star
Now You – GASP! – You – PANT! PANT! PA – You Tell M – URK!
“There’s no reason to work yourself to death
The mantra that working longer hours equals more success simply isn’t true”
– Globe and Mail
Religiously Just Not Getting It
“Hiking ban on sacred rock prompts a tourist rush”
– Toronto Star
Unfortunately, There’s No “Me” In Tsunami
“Ford vows tighter vetting rules after wave of departures”
– Globe and Mail
Victim Apparently Laughed Herself To Death
“Python kills woman”
– Toronto Sun
Poverty Groups Probably Have Opinions, Too – Not That We Would Know…
“Business groups urge Morneau to push back on calls for new spending, tax hikes”
– Globe and Mail
“Business leaders urge end to Canada-China friction”
– Globe and Mail
“Unsustainable Debt! Unsuuuuuusssssstainable Deeeeeebbbbt!
“Beware rise of zombie debt, experts say”
– Toronto Star
Whoa! Talk About Doing The Time Warp Again!
“It’s time to diversify Canadian trade
With abundant resources and a well-educated work force, our country shouldn’t settle for unfair deals with the U.S. and China”
– Globe and Mail
It Will Wave As It Says, “Hi, Ecology. Nice Knowing You”
“Technology will address climate issues”
– Toronto Sun
If Only Their Metabolisms Didn’t Require So Many Calories, They Could Be More Financially Solvent
“Canadians’ savings rate nears lowest level in decades”
– Globe and Mail
Funny, I Feel The Same Way About Columnists
“Forget about the money
Teachers should make do or find new work”
– Toronto Sun
It Will Take Their Attention Away From Being Stuck In The Past Over Racial Justice Issues And Economics
“The Conservatives can’t be stuck in the past on LGBTQ rights”
– Globe and Mail
“Nag, Nag, Nag,” Spy Agencies Respond
“Spy agencies must be transparent about data-crunching, analyst warns”
– Toronto Star
Damn Straight! It Doesn’t Get Any More Real Than Unicorns Using Alberta Crude To Keep Their Coats Sleek And Shiny!
“How many pipelines do we really need?
Against a backdrop that is looking increasingly grim for the oil industry, we have to make reality-based decisions”
– Globe and Mail
Because The Entrepreneurial Body Died Years Ago
“Tories must focus on advancing entrepreneurial spirit”
– Toronto Sun
Do We Eat It…Or Use A Tissue To Expel It From Our Nose?
“Gezellig is the new hygge”
– Globe and Mail
No Truth To The Rumour That They Asked President Trump To Hook Them Up With His Source Of Funding
“Cannabis companies taking desperate steps to raise funds
As share prices collapse, producers consider costly terms that may harm existing shareholders”
– Globe and Mail
Women Vote?
“How feminism could figure into the federal election”
– Globe and Mail
We Already Have More Data On Gun Unsafety Than We Know What To Do With
“Gun-Safety Data Needed”
– New York Times
Losing One Is No Fun, Either
“Winning a lawsuit is only the start of more troubles”
– Globe and Mail
Youuuuuu…Might Want To Wait To See If President Trump Comes Through
“It’s high time to give cannabis stocks a look”
– Globe and Mail