Where Were The Economic Experts When Liberals Were Being Given The Blame For Inflation?
“Can Liberals take credit for easing inflation?
Economic experts say global factors created the crisis and are now helping to solve it”
– Toronto Star
As An Optimist, I Would Say I Am Not Optimistic
“Will optimism triumph over pessimism?
Harris campaign plays up sunnier outlook, while Trump paints a darker picture of America”
– Toronto Star
I Am Perfectly Harm – It. I Meant It. Silly Fat Hand Digits. IT Is Perfectly Harmless!
“People Fear A.I.
But They Shouldn’t.”
– New York Times
We Need It To Put On People’s Dining Tables At Home
“It’s time to stop exporting coal.”
– Toronto Star
But Those Who Survived Wouldn’t Have To Worry About Global Warming Any More
So, There’s That…
“The ‘nuclear winter’ scenario
At least 95% of Canada’s population would starve”
– Toronto Star
Waiting For The Press To Get Bored Of Story
Is It Working?
“Ottawa remains undecided on CBC chief’s bonus”
– Toronto Star
This Week In “It’s A Feature, Not A Bug”
“Killing of Hezbollah leaders may backfire in the end
Provocative acts threaten to spark another war between Israel and Lebanon”
– Toronto Star
It Will Be Just Like Tombstone, Arizona, Circa 1876
“A CUT ABOVE
Student barbers add drug treatment training to their skills in an effort to fight opioid crisis in underserved communities”
– Toronto Star
Are You Kidding? His Gut Is A Risk-Benefit Analysis Machine!
“Ford should use more risk-benefit analysis”
– Toronto Star
My Emotions Are Telling Me That This Is Really Dumb – How Smart Does That Make Me?
“We’re only as smart as our emotions”
– New York Times
I Have
I Hear The Sidewalk Is A Comfortable Place To Sleep
“RETIREMENT
Plan to live to 100 when preparing for the future”
– Toronto Star
It Was As If Stalin Met Max Headroom, But With Less Than A Quarter Of The Charm
“Trump chat with Musk was glitchy and weird”
– Toronto Star
If Your Hand Was Any More On The Pulse Of The Culture, The Vibrations Would Shatter It!
“Shiloh Jolie officially drops Pitt surname”
– Toronto Star
As Long As We’re Dreaming, Can I Have A Pony?
“Prevent public cuts by fairly taxing the 1%”
– Toronto Star
Especially When The Wind Shifts While You’re Trying To Scatter Ashes
“Death can be a dirty business”
– Toronto Star
Unlike In Stores, Consumers Cannot Squeeze Them To See If They’re Fresh
“New Problem for Bats: Online Sales”
– New York Times
He’s Somebody Who Really Knows How To Put The Ass Back In Compassion
“Ford calls facilities ‘failed policy’
Premier dismisses concerns closures will increase overdose deaths, calling them ‘scare ractic'”
– Toronto Star
He Also Knows How To Put The Ass Back In Assassination
Such A Talented Politician!
“Reports urged province to keep safe drug site open
Queen St. E. facility offers needed service, two reviews found in wake of shooting”
– Toronto Star
Can I Have That Pony In Small, Unmarked Bills?
“Canada’s inflation rate falls to 2.5%
Drop paves way for interest rate cut”
– Toronto Star
Nothing Brings More Joy Than Surviving Certain Death
“Aging at 10,000 feet
Friendship – and skydiving – proven to help bring joy when growing older”
– Toronto Star
Parachute Didn’t Open, Eh?
“We died laughing at ourselves”
– Toronto Star
So…You’re Saying Biden Was To Blame?
“Large Grocers Took Advantage of Pandemic Supply Chain Disruptions, F.T.C. Finds
A report found that large firms pressured suppliers to favor them over competitors. It also concluded that some retailers seem to have used rising costs as an opportunity to further hike prices”
– New York Times
More People To Blame (Especially If They’re Named Biden)
“Benefits of travelling beyond your border”
– Toronto Star
Have You Considered Taking Up Skydiving?
“I am 75 and not sure I want to work anymore”
– Toronto Star
But If You Go Before You Put On Your Swimming Suit, You Should Be Fine
If Not, Blame Biden
“Seine swimming is mostly fine – except for the poop”
– Toronto Star
Nothing Brings More Joy Than Surviving Certain…Blame, Err, Biden –
I…Uhh, May Have Gone To This Well One Too Many Times…
“What’s love got to do with it?
Why every couple needs a prenup before saying ‘I do'”
– Toronto Star