Trump Looks On In Envy
“Russia
War journalist was tortured”
– Toronto Star
They Will Quickly Run Aground Because Of Pierre Poilievre’s Old Way Of Obstructing
But I’m Sure By Then Right-wing Pundits Will Have Come Up With New Advice
“Time to put country before party
Political campaigns are predicated on competing. Now it’s time for Mark Carney to experiment with new ways of collaborating”
– Toronto Star
Since Cockroaches Are Likely The Only Creatures Who Will Survive Global Climate Change, It’s Good To Know We’re Providing Them With Comfortable Homes
“Crafted with care
Meet the Toronto shoemaker who custom-makes classic footwear that will stand the test of time”
– Toronto Star
Conservative Pundits Wanted A Conservative Prime Minister, So Carney Must Cross The Floor
“PM must respond to desire for change”
– Toronto Star
To Be Fair, He Thought It Was A Tip
“An Uber driver took off with kid in the back”
– Toronto Star
A Block Behind Its Product
Given How Parts Fly Off It, Management Thought It Was A Prudent Way To Avoid Lawsuits
“Plow company stands by its product”
– Toronto Star
Hockey? You Were Talking About Hockey? From The First Line, I Thought You Were Talking About Something Trivial, Like The World Economy!
“Things about to get tougher
The Leafs feel it, or they will soon, as the Panthers dish out an added side of nasty”
– Toronto Star
As He Missed His Chance With Women More Generally – How Did This Guy Ever Find Somebody Who Would Marry Him?
“Poilievre missed his chance with women voters”
– Toronto Star
Or I Could Use The Forest App On My Phone
All Of The Trees, None Of The Insects – Talk About A Win/Win!
“Forest bathing, touching grass and naturism
Research shows spending time in nature is good for our well-being”
– Toronto Star
Tentacle 307 Will Shock You!
“A Cautionary Tale of 408 Tentacles”
– New York Times
It’s Almost Like They Want A Reason To Privatize The System…
“Red tape leads to exodus of nurses
Foreign-trained professionals face barriers in Ontario”
– Toronto Star
It’s Almost Like There’s A Good Reason NOT To Privatize The System…
“The expensive temptation of temps
Records revel Hamilton hospitals turned to pricey private agencies during a staffing crunch – at a steep cost to Ontario’s public health system”
– Toronto Star
As Long As We Ignore Africa…
And The Middle East…
And Latin America…
And Asia…
But Other Than That, Par-tay!
“MARKING 80 YEARS OF PEACE”
– Toronto Star
Looks Like Putin Took Trump’s Chastisement To Heart
“Russia launches strikes after rejecting ceasefire”
– Toronto Star
“Those Red Spots On My Face? My…Kid Got A Little Too Frisky With A Red Marker – Why Do You Ask?”
“Health Minister insists measles efforts working
Province seeing cases continue to rise, including 223 infections last week”
– Toronto Star
He Got Advice About How To Spend His Time From The Grim Reaper
“Buffet stuns shareholders by announcing retirement
Berkshire CEO will step down at end of year
– Toronto Star
TRANSLATION FROM POLITISPEAK: “He Can’t Make His Best Attacks Without Parliamentary Privilege!”
“MP resigns so Poilievre can run again
Kurek says party needs Conservative leader in House of Commons to hold Liberals to account”
– Toronto Star
Believe It Or N…Ugh…I Mean – I – Suddenly, I Don’t Feel So Good!
“At Ripley’s on Easter Monday?
Measles exposure a possibility”
– Toronto Star
The Favour Train Runs In Only One Direction – Which Makes It All The More Surprising When It Arrives Anywhere
“‘Trump isn’t doing Canada any favours here'”
– Toronto Star
I Find Solace On The Dessert Tray In My Local Mandarin Restaurant
Everybody’s Spiritual Journey Is Unique, I Suppose…
“A place for personal healing
In search of solace, I travelled to one of Japan’s most spiritual places and stayed at a Buddhist temple”
– Toronto Star
But Was It Really A Scam, Or Just A Way Of Reminding You Of The Nonsensical Nature Of The Concept Of Owning Objects?
Consider It A Spiritual Lesson On Your Unique Journey…
“The case of the nonexistent hotel
I booked a vacation property that turned out to be an empty lot. Here’s how to avoid getting scammed the same way”
– Toronto Star