The federal government, ever helpful, has a wide variety of publications to help entrepreneurs start their own businesses. Conspicuous by its absence, however, is a volume on how to realistically, not to mention effectively, navigate the rocky shoals of the government itself. I offer the following pointers in the hope that I can, in some small way, make up for this deficiency:
1. THE BEST WAY TO DEAL WITH THE GOVERNMENT IS NOT TO DEAL WITH THE GOVERNMENT. It is easier to buy a controlling interest in a trust company than it is to get the government to licence a new one; it is easier to get a television or radio licence by buying an existing television or radio station than it is to get the government to licence a new one. The most important lesson is one few entrepreneurs learn in time: it is easier to buy than to create, especially in these days of leveraged buy-outs where anybody with 39 cents and a friend at Drexel Burnham Lambert or Merril Lynch can take control of a major multinational corporation. Just remember not to overextend yourself: don’t try to purchase CBS when one of its affiliates is all you need to get started.
2. LOBBY TILL YOU DROP. Most business/government disagreements occur because the government does not fully appreciate the interest of the company(s) involved. It is important to open the channels of communication as early as possible, making friends in government before they are needed (although inviting officials to start-up weenie roasts is considered by many a sign of over-eagerness). Most industries have an organization expressly for the purpose of communicating with the government (the National Association of Broadcasters, for instance). And, never hesitate to state the industry’s position to an official or a journalist; most other industry members would do the same for you.
3. INSTALL A REVOLVING DOOR IN YOUR EXECUTIVE SUITE. It is always a good idea to have three or four former government officials on your payroll – as senior executives if they have any ability, on the board of directors if they don’t. With their contacts, they can be very useful in ensuring the government fully understand your concerns. It is also an excellent idea to allow some staff members to accept positions within government. In fact, some companies insist upon it. Not only does this allow the person to serve the public, but it ensures that the government isn’t able to pull a fast one on you.
4. COME THE DELUGE. Most government departments are overworked and badly understaffed, and experience shows that several thousand pages of charts, graphs, projections, formulae and other unrelated statistics thrown at them will cool the ardour of even the most fanatical anti-business zealot. Nine times out of 10, the department will accept your conclusions, even if they do not agree with the conclusions of the department’s own studies, simply if your study weighs more. In most cases, however, the government will not even have its own studies, in which case the department will probably agree with your conclusions so nobody will have to admit that they haven’t read any of your documents.
5. HELLO, OTTAWA? HAVE YOU GOT ANY IDEA WHAT YOUR PROVINCIAL COUNTERPARTS ARE DOING? When regulatory jurisdiction is split, do not hesitate to play one level of government off against the other. The owner of Astra Trust, for instance, continued to illegally use depositors’ money for years because both the federal and provincial regulators expected the other to shut the company down. This is, of course, a correlate of the traditional government strategy of blaming other levels of government for problems to confuse the electorate. Learn from the masters.
6. CONSIDER ALL OTHER THINGS EQUAL. During hearings, try to make action by the government that would harm your interests unacceptable by giving it politically suicidal consequences. If the government threatens to fine you for polluting the environment, for instance, claim that the cost of plant renovations to reduce such pollution will force you to lay off massive numbers of employees (but, save yourself embarrassment and limit your forecast to no more than the number of people you actually employ). If this method of obfuscation doesn’t work, shift the blame. If you are a major Canadian polluter, insist that American pollution is more damaging to the environment. Never, however, try to shift the blame onto other members of your own industry, a tactic referred to as “fouling one’s own support network.”
7. PROMISE THEM ANYTHING. Because of what you have just read, most government departments are very sympathetic towards the industries they are supposed to regulate. Extremely sympathetic. Therefore, in the unlikely event that you are threatened with serious action, agree to do whatever the government wants you to do, no matter how divorced from the reality of your industry. When you do not achieve it, plead financial hardship and renegotiate. With the right lawyers, government guidelines can be negotiated until parallel lines meet, or until Parkinson’s Law of Delay takes effect. (To further complicate matters, try changing lawyers every three or four months and only return every other phone call. Most private television networks have used this tactic to successfully deal with Canadian content quotas.
Government is not our enemy – just a very, very cranky friend. Good luck with your business.
Sources
Best, Patricia and Ann Shortell. A Matter of Trust. Toronto: Penguin Books, 1985.
Hardin, Herschel. Closed Circuits. Vancouver: Douglas & McIntyre, 1985.
Various newspaper articles.