Skip to content

Elon Day’s Journey Into Night

New article image of a Book Cover

To The Viktor Goes The Spoiled

Republicans against Trump
@RpsAgainstTrump

Trump on Hungary’s autocratic PM Viktor Orban: “There’s nobody that’s better, smarter or a better leader than Viktor Orban…He’s a non-controversial figure because he says, ‘This is the way it’s going to be,’ and that’s the end of it…He’s the boss.”

Haven’t You Heard? It Was Only A Civil Trial, Not A Criminal Trial, So It Doesn’t Count

Shannon Watts
@shannonrwatts

Sen Katie Britt says sexual assault is the worst thing that can happen to a woman while encouraging Americans to vote for a convicted sexual predator.

Or, And Hear Me Out On This, YOU’RE MAKING SHIT UP WITH ZERO EVIDENCE AND MAYBE YOU SHOULD STOP SCREWING AROUND WITH PEOPLE’S LIVES EVEN IF THEY ARE FAMOUS!
Oh, Wait, This Is The Internet…Sorry For The Outburst, I Don’t Know What I Was Thinking – Carry On

Laurie Kilmartin
@anylaurie

William asks for a divorce, she attempts suicide (in December), she is treated and they’ve been trying to contain/ calm/ manage her ever since?

I Would Be Against Racists Even If They Never Crawled Out From Under Their Rocks
Can’t Racism Be Bad Just Because It Causes Innocent People To Suffer?

Bruin Republicans at UCLA
@BruinGOP

We would be against immigration even if the immigrants never committed any crimes.

Conservatives love stories like Laken Riley’s because it gives them an excuse to be anti-immigrant.

Can’t immigration be bad just because it facilitates the ethnic replacement of white Americans?

There’s A Reason Nobody Pays Attention To The Red Carpet At The State Of The Union Address

Riley Beggin
@rbeggin

Rep. Troy Nehls, R-Texas, sporting a Trump t-shirt and a patriotic bowtie

If They Can Really Do This To Him, Why Haven’t They Done It To You?

Tucker Carlson
@TuckerCarlson

Derek Chauvin is serving 21 years in prison for a crime he didn’t commit. Someone just tried to murder him. If they do this to him, they’d do it to you.

Less Than A Week Later, DeSantis Proved His Observation To Be True

Acyn
@Acyn

DeSantis: You can be the most worthless Republican in America, if you kiss the ring, Trump will say you are wonderful.

Except For All The Bankruptcies
And Criminal Indictments
And Bone Spurs
Otherwise, It’s Like They Were Separated At Birth!

Ron Filipkowski
@RonFilipkowski

Guy at Trump rally roday: “This will be my 68th Trump rally. Trump is our first rock star, superhero president. He is the real life Tony Stark. He’s President Ironman.

Some Countries Get A Leader When They Elect A Comedian To High Public Office
Other Countries Get Mike Johnson…

Chris Murphy
@ChrisMurphyCT

the speaker said he wouldn’t pass ukraine funding without a border deal and we got a deal and then he killed the deal because he said we didn’t need a deal and now he says he won’t pass our ukraine funding bill bc it doesn’t include a border deal

honestly

wtf

Any Money I Give To Donald Trump Will Be A Loan
And The Interest I Expect Is None Of Your Business!

Elon Musk
@elonmusk

Just to be super clear, I am not donating money to either candidate for US President

Trudeau Adviser Tells A Conservative Critic To Make Dirty Checks When The Ref Isn’t Looking? That Doesn’t Sound So –
It Means WHAT‽
Oh. Okay. That’s…Umm…Yeah, I Wish I Could Unknow That…

Supriya Dwivedi

“fun fact: I don’t have to be professional when interacting with a disinfo meme factory account you can go back to gooning to Jordan Peterson videos now”

Was It A Pot Cookie?

Reza Chowdhury
@RezaC1

Replying to @POTUS

I just paid $18.75 for a cookie. It was $17.75 last month and $15.75 in late December. Before you became president, it was $3.75.

Canada Is A Hellhole – You Really Don’t Want To Come Here

CALL TO ACTIVISM
@CalltoActivism

Trump supporters are threatening to leave the United States if Trump is convicted.

What do you say to them?

Republicans Would Respond: “No, It’s Not. This Country Is Perfect Just The Way It Is.”
Fun To Watch, But Ultimately Unhelpful

Elie Mystal
@ElieNYC

I bet Biden would pick up more votes than he’d lose if he just came out and authentically said: “The State of our Union… is fucked. We need to seriously re-consider what the fuck we’re doing.”

Are You Bitter He Invalidated Your “Biden Is Barely Conscious Or Aware Of His Surroundings” Narrative, Or Were You Just Screaming Because You Do It So Often You Can’t Hear Yourself Doing It Any More?

Acyn
@Acyn

Cruz: Biden was angry, he was bitter, he was screaming the entire night. He was radical and extreme

Right Behind Super Rich Ex-wonderkinds With An Uncertain Grasp Of Grammar Who Love Nazis

Elon Musk
@elonmusk

“Super rich ex-wives who hate their former spouse” should filed be listed among “Reasons that Western Civilization died”

That’s What Happens When You Have A Weak Director

Molly Jong-Fast
@MollyJongFast

Katie Britt feels like she’s overacting.

IPMS: “I Thought You Said It Wasn’t Perfection – Make Up Your Mind!”

Saul Staniforth
@SaulStaniforth

Kay Burley: Is Israel doing a good enough job getting aid into Gaza?

Israeli PM spokesperson: “Is the benchmark perfection?”

Kay Burley: “No, it’s kids not starving.”

So…Greed Isn’t Good?
Once Again, The Movies Lie!

Lauren McKenzie
@TheMcKenziest

Fun reminder time – more than 80% of stoves sold in America are made with prison slave labor.

They’re desperate to keep Marijuana illegal so their profits won’t be affected. That’s it. That’s end stage capitalism strangling itself to death on the greed of the worst of humanity

I Never Cease To Be Amazed At What Other People Are Amazed At

Laurence Tribe
@tribelaw

I never cease to be amazed that some people believe that my empathy with innocent Palestinian victims of IDF’s cruelty as evidence that I’m insensitive to the plight of the innocent Israeli victims of Hamas. Their hearts must be too hardened to grieve for the victims on all sides.

Trump Immediately Boasted That He Had Got A Chubbie

Tom Joseph
@TomJChicago

Chubb, a publicly traded company, underwrote the $91.63 million E Jean Carroll bond for Trump. Owners of Chubb stock, symbol CB, should demand to know why their company is helping an adjudicated rapist.