“‘Bush sucks.’ Good sign.” “Are you being ironic?” “Naah. We live in the post-ironic age.” “What does that mean?” “It means I can be stupid without actually being witty.” “Ain’t theory grand?”
“What a rip! I drove all the way from Boston to stand in the free speech zone in New York to protest the President’s speech!” “Why are you so angry?” “Because I just found out the President is speaking in Los Angeles.” “Didn’t you know that free speech zones are created to keep protestors away from the President?” “That makes no sense.” “Look. It’s really very simple. Next time you want to protest a speech the President is giving in Texas, go to Selma, Alabama. And, if the President is to appear in Arkansas, go to New Mexico.” “What if the President is giving a speech in Washington?” “Have you ever wanted to be on the space shuttle?” “This is nuts. I thought all of the country was a free speech zone.” “Oh, it is. Just not all at the same time.” “What?” “I come from Nebraska. We love free speech and all, but, you know, sometimes it’s a burden we’re happy to pass off to…Arizona or…or Kentucky.” “I can’t belie – say, wait a minute. If you knew all this, what are you doing here? I mean, you must have known the President wasn’t going to be here.” “Sure. I just like having fun with protestors…”
“Go ahead.” “What?” “Ask her.” “But, I don’t know her.” “Have you seen the way she’s been looking at you?” “She has?” “She wants you to ask her.” “But…” “Seriously. How do you know what’s going to happen if you don’t try. Go. You’ve got feet. Walk up to her and ask her.” “Okay. Okay… Ahem, miss?” “Yes?” “Do you think the United States would be right to invade Holland if any of the members of the executive branch were brought in front of the International Criminal Court in the Hague for war crimes?” “I’m sorry, but I’m not that kind of girl!”
“Did you bring bottles of water?” “No.” “Oh.” “Should I have?” “Well, your throat is going to get pretty dry from shouting loud enough for the President to hear you.” “Maybe that’s not why we’re here.” “No?” “Maybe we’re here for the press coverage.” “The press coverage?” “That’s right.” “How are the press going to cover you when they’re with the President?” “…” “Yep. I love protestors!”
“You know I was in Seattle?” “No shit?” “No shit.” “What was it like?” “Amazing! We got our asses kicked and we got our names took.” “Oh…” “Then, there was Washington.” “Was that any better?” “Are you kidding? We got our asses seriously kicked in Washington. And they took our names…twice!” “Are you sure -” “Then, there was Quebec City.” “You got your asses kicked?” “Abso-fuckin’-lutely!” “And they took your names?” “You best believe that!” “Seriously, don’t you think -” “But, the best was Davos last year.” “Your asses were kicked and your names were taken?” “Took.” “Listen, aren’t you supposed to be the ones kicking ass and taking names?” “You obviously don’t understand how protests against international corporate fascism are supposed to work…”
“Yer one o’ them troublemakers, ain’tcha?” “I’m no troublemaker! I…am a law student.” “Worst kind o’ troublemaker.” “Why do you think I’m a troublemaker?” “You’re wearing a helmet and I don’t see no bicycles around. Why’re ya wearing a helmet?” “You ever been hit in the head by a police baton?” “Sure. Had me some shine stills out past concession 37 back in the seventies. Got my head busted more’n once by the cops. Deserved it, too. That was when people gave a good goldurn – now, of course, the police turn a blind eye and the shine has ‘quality control’ or some kind of shi -” “You…you aren’t really concerned about corporate corruption or globalization, are you?” “A man can’t reminisce about his youth? What is this country coming to.” “Well -” “Troublemaker.”
“Programmes! Get yer programmes here!” “Programmes? At a protest rally?” “How else you gonna know your Raging Grannies from your Black Box Anarchists?” “Doesn’t it defeat the purpose of decentralized planning?” “Look. You don’t wanna go to see puppet street theatre only to get there an hour before it starts and be forced to chain yerself to a fence. My programmes are a valuable service.” “But -” “Really. Don’t you want to know when the Latin American indigenous agrarian revolution lecture starts?” “Why would I?” “So you can avoid it?” “Well, not that the Latin American indigenous agrarian revolution isn’t vitally important, but -” “Hey, I believe in anti-capitalist protest, but ain’t a guy allowed ta make a buck out of it?”