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Conversations Overheard at the Corner of Yonge and Bloor

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“Oh, those are very pretty…”

“It’s just a lot of cheap junk. Come on.”

“No. I want to look at them. What are these?”

“Earrings, miss.”

“They’re just pieces of twisted metal with a little paint thrown on them.”

“I like them. Won’t you get me a pair?”

“No.”

“Please?”

“Fine. I’ll get myself a pair. How much are they?”

“Two dollars for a pair.”

“That’s all?”

“Say, that is pretty cheap…okay, I’ll get you a pair if -“

“Forget it. I’ve changed my mind. Let’s go.”

“Sure…if that’s what you wa – hey! Wait up!”

“Hmph…tourists!”

* * *

“You must believe in the Lord and take him into your heart! As the Bible says -“

“Excuse me…”

“Yes, Sinner?”

“Do you have the correct time?”

“Time has run out for those who do not have faith in the Lord! Armageddon is at hand, brother, as the good book says -“

“Please, I just need the time.”

“You may think that’s all you need, friend, but what you really need is a reading from the Scriptures!”

“Thanks anyway. I’ll ask somebody else.”

“Three fifteen.”

* * *

“Fred, look at that!”

“What?”

“Look at that ugly old man and woman. The ones with the shopping bags and filthy clothes…”

“Where?”

“Over there.”

“Where?”

“Over there, jerk!”

“Oh. Yeah. So?”

“We…we aren’t going to look like that when we get older, are we?”

“Are you kidding? We’ll never get that old.”

* * *

“Well, will you look at that!”

“What’s that, Missus?”

“Those two kids with the orange hair and safety pins in their noses.”

“Where?”

“Over there.”

“Where?”

“Please! There!”

“Oh. Okay. So?”

“We weren’t that strange when we were younger…were we?”

“I…I think so…”

* * *

“Buy a button, sir?”

“Oh? What’s this?”

“The money from the sale of these buttons goes to the Non-Nuclear Network. Our immediate goal is to keep nuclear weapons off Canadian soil. Our ultimate goal is to stop the insane arms race…”

“Oh, yes? Young man – harrumph – don’t you have anything better to do with your time?”

“Sir?”

“Why don’t you get a job?”

“I have a job, sir. I’m a junior partner in the law firm of Mishkin, Plithkin and Schwartz.”

“I see. Then, what’s your angle?”

“My angle?”

“What are you getting from standing here on a hot afternoon selling…buttons?”

“It’s what I believe in.”

“Oh, sure. You have to say that. But, what are you really getting out of this?”

“Excuse me…buy a button, ma’am?”

* * *

“Thanks for the ice cream…”

“My pleasure.”

:What should we do this afternoon?”

“I don’t know. What do you want to do?”

“I asked you first.”

“I asked you last.”

“That’s not going to get us anywhere.”

“Who says we need to get anywhere?”

“Mmmmmmmmmmmm…”