From the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Political Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition:
Chretien’s Complaint (1997.00) occurs when a major political leader attempts to hide his lust for power behind a folksy image. The psychic distance between the public image the politician wishes to maintain and his true personality can result in a wide variety of eccentric behaviours, including:
1) Inappropriate verbal responses to questions (also known as The Reagan Reflex).
2) Violent outbursts when confronted by proof of his ambition.
3) Physical awkwardness (sometimes referred to as Ford’s Folly).
4) A diet mainly consisting of poutine.
As long as the politician’s popularity remains high, the prognosis is not good as the incentive to maintain the fake concept of self is given frequent positive reinforcement. Until the politician admits his true personality, avoid mirrors and national news programs.
Charest’s Charade (1997.01) occurs when a politician lives under the delusion that he actually leads a national party. This may arise as a result of:
1) An election reducing his party to a small rump.
2) The politician trying to start his own party (sometimes referred to as Perot’s Problem).
3) Retirement.
Sufferers of this disorder often have bizarre mood shifts, seemingly strong and in control one minute, gnashing their teeth and blaming their situation on the party’s former leader the next. The disorder is triggered by an election and, although symptoms may linger for years, generally goes away if left alone.
Manning’s Malady (1997.02) occurs when a political leader contradicts himself in public statements, often within the same sentence, with no apparent recognition of the contradiction. Examples include:
1) “I am not a racist, I just think that immigration has to be drastically reduced because immigrants come to this country without learning our language or customs and proceed to take advantage of our generous welfare system!”
2) “Somebody has to be in control of this grassroots party!”
3) “I love Quebec — it’s an integral part of Canada — even though it’s populated by a bunch of greedy whiners who will stop at nothing to soak the rest of us for everything they can get out of any special status we give them!”
This disorder, which is suspected to be widespread, is currently considered to be incurable, since confronting the sufferer with the reality of his utterances usually pushes him deeper into denial. Its worst excesses have been shown to be controllable, though, by repeated screenings of the full three hour version of Manufacturing Consent.
Duceppe’s Dilemma (1997.03) occurs when the leader of a party with fundamentally regional concerns and support attempts to act on a national stage. The more successful the leader is, the greater the dissonance between his perceived goals and actual achievements. To diminish this dissonance, some politicians will quit the national scene altogether, returning to the regional politics with which they are more comfortable (see: Bouchard’s Bombast, 1994.03). Those suffering from Duceppe’s Dilemma will exhibit characteristics of self-defeating behaviour, which may include: poor campaign srtrategies; foolish statements to the press; lacklustre performance at all-candidates debates. Such behaviours rarely lessen the dissonance unless they lead to the politician’s early retirement; however, an appointment to the federal senate is counter-indicated as it quickly reinstates the original problem.
McDonough’s Mistaken Perception (1997.04) occurs when a politician remains committed to ideological beliefs which are deemed deviant by society at large. Such beliefs may include:
1) That the state has a role in developing a national economy.
2) That poverty should be treated as a problem to be overcome with legislation rather than as a communicable disease which should be quarantined.
3) That corporations cannot be looked upon as the best source of social justice.
MMP can lead to the humiliation of ostracization from the public consciousness brought on by repeated ridicule in the media. There is much debate about whether the beliefs which commonly occur in MMP are, in fact, signs of a pathological condition, or merely a healthy, democratic difference of opinion. However, at the last meeting of the APA’s Political Mental Disorders Working Group, it was decided that such issues were beyond the scope of the organization.