INTRODUCTION
Alternate Reality News Service Frequently Unasked Questions
ALTERNATE TECHNOLOGY
Alternate Reality Ain’t What It Used To Be
“Oh – Ha Ha Ha – That Kook – Hee Hee – Kurzweil!”
The Soul of the Old Machine
Your High School Impression Was Correct – History IS Boring!
The Bots Are Back in Town
Where Many Have Gone Before, Just Not Lately
The Tall and The Short Of It
But, Who Will Teach The Children?
Trial of the Nanosecond
A New Meaning Of The Term “Undercover Operation”
Survivor: Heaven
Abandoned Robot Crisis Feared
If You Don’t Like This Universe, Try Another One!
ALTERNATE RELATIONSHIPS
Ask Amritsar: Beauty and the Beast In One Inconvenient Package
The Path of True Google Love Is Never Smooth
Size DOES Matter
Whose Identity Is It, Anyway?
Unholy Matrimony?
Alien Love
What Price, Vanity?
Seeing Red for the Last Time
Men Are From Microsoft, Women Are From Apple
Fashion Revolution
Nothing Subtle About Fools
ALTERNATE GAMES
I Don’t Want To Be Part Of Your Revolution If I Can’t Dance Dance
Profiles in Courage: Martin Felderhoffer
Fit For a King?
History Is Made At Night (019:57:32 Internet Standard Time, To Be Exact)
Until the Smiting Begins
ALTERNATE POLITICS
US Signs Deal with DUGOO
Political Brand Standing
But, Is It Good For The Jews?
The Old Ball Game Is Juiced
Do Politicians Really Believe The Bullshit They Say?
Just Another Typical Wedgie Issue
How Robert Novak’s Eyebrows Saved America
The Quality of Merciless Is Not Litigated
Those Who Forget History Are Doomed To Keep Living It
The Magic is Gone
Red Blood + Whitewash + Blue Nation = Blackwater
What Goes Around…Makes You Dizzy When It Comes Around
DoD Can’t Hack It!
ALTERNATE ECONOMICS
Progress – It’s in the Air!
Turn! Turn! Turn! A Time To Work And A Time To Work More
Last Tree Standing
Gang War Nets Littlest Victim To Date
One Singularity Sensation
ALTERNATIVE ARTS AND CULTURE
Cruel and Unusual – The Musical
About Bloody Time…Or, Is It?
Revenge Is Sour
Is There An Eco In Here?
Death Is Easy…
An Operation To Forget
Father Knows Least
Now and Again
Hear Hear!
Out for Blood
Confessions of a Pizza Delivery Guy
Urban Adventures: Eyeball Pinball
ALTERNATE LIVES
Lives Unlived – Folger McWonderman
Lives Unlived – Peter Underhill
Lives Unlived – George W. Bush
Lives Unlived – Harve Nordlinger
Lives Unlived – Poncho Margaret Hatrack Devilliers Santo Domingo Harris
Lives Unlived – Charles Foster “Charlie” Brown
Lives Unlived – Ferenzcia de Filippi
Lives Unlived – Ronald Winston Smith Reagan
ALTERNATE ALTERNATIVES
The Ungulate of Trimestres Declares Universal Impanishad
It’s for Science!
Popularity of Gravity Waning
Where the Pasta Hits the Road
Do You Mind?
Science Gets Out of Hand
Life Begins at the Hop
The Voice of Sanity Gets Its Chance
Priming Armageddon
How? Quaint!
ALTERNATE BONUS
The Alternate Reality News Service’s Field Guide to Alien Species