Deficit Hawks Were Disappointed
Everybody I talked to on the opening day of the Ad Astra science fiction convention was dog tired. On the opening day. This did not bode well; bone weariness was usually how people felt at the end of the con. I hoped that we were in some sort of inverted time loop, where people started off tired and got progressively more energy until, by Sunday’s close, we were all ready to run marathons and solve deficit crises.
It didn’t work out that way, of course. By Sunday afternoon, exhaustion had set in: most of us were shambling around, barely able to string two coherent words together.
My mistake was thinking we were in a science fiction movie, when, obviously, we were in a zombie movie.
I May Have Been Joking – It’s Hard To Tell With Me Sometimes
“I became a writer for the groupies.”
– possibly the dumbest thing any author has said at a science fiction convention, and, I should know, considering I was the one who said it
Happy Anniversary! Can I Have A Slice Of Literary Snobbishness?
This being the 30th anniversary of Ad Astra, many of the famous Guest Authors of the past were in attendance. Stuck in the Dealer’s Room for most of the con, you might expect that I wouldn’t get to meet any of them. You would be expecting wrong.
Guy Gavriel Kay sauntered into the Dealer’s Room on Saturday afternoon. As he passed my table and I started up my pitch, he took one look at me, politely said, “No thanks,” and kept walking. I was snubbed by the author of The Summer Tree and…umm…other books, I’m sure! What a thrill!
That would have been a highlight of my con, easy, except a few minutes later Ben Bova – yes, that Ben Bova! – actually stopped and politely listened to my book pitch. Ben Bova! Listened to me talk! I am still so in awe of this moment that I don’t actually have a joke ready to undermine it!
What A Long, Strange Triptych It’s Been
Jessica Frey has “an Evita moment” at the launch of her first novel, Triptych. Her words, not mine. Seriously, she said it not me – please don’t send letters.
The cake served at the Triptych book launch came in raspberry and banana flavours with marzipan icing. Mmmm…marzipan icing. Can you spot the cake in this picture? HINT: It isn’t in the shape of a coffee urn.
And, always remember, children: while the ink in your pen may sparkle, real vampires never do.
I Probably Still Would Have, But It Would Definitely Have Shifted The Odds
On Saturday night, the hotel hosted the “University of Buffalo Students Dinner.” When I saw that, I thought: “Cool. If the University of Waterloo did shit like that when I was an undergrad, I might not have dropped out after my first year there!”
And, For Any Americans Who May Be In Attendance: Please Humour Us (Lord Knows, Our Politicians Do)
I thought a science fiction convention would be the perfect place to get away from politics in the middle of an election. Sadly, I was mistaken, as the following panel names suggest:
- Cutting Budgets the Klingon Way
- What Captain Adama Could Teach Michael Ignatieff About Leadership
- What Captain Kirk Could Teach Stephen Harper About Diplomacy
- Law and Order: Is There a Judge Dredd in Canada’s Future?
- What Jack Layton Could Teach Captain Reynolds About Moustaches
- Red pill/blue pill: whose agenda will voters buy?
Bonus Out Of Focus Image Gallery
Scary? Adorable? Or, scary adorable? Opinions at the Ad Astra Masquerade were mixed.
He may be gone, but he certainly isn’t forgotten. And, he may not even be gone, being a time traveller and all. Especially not when there are shiny objects to be had.
If Falstaff had been equipped with a light sabre, Henry IV, Part 1 would have been very different. Very different, indeed.
This is not a costume – this is actually a chef at the hotel where Ad Astra was held. If this is where he buys his utensils, I don’t want to go anywhere near his kitchen!
* Yeah, I know, that joke was probably done to death ages ago, but you try and come up with a dozen puns on the word convention!