Thank you, !99 cent deals!, for signing up for The Daily Me. Our search engine has combed the Internet for up to the minute news items that fit the profile you have so painstakingly filled out for us. Then, we weighted the probability that you would be interested in these articles against forms which showed what people with tastes similar to yours have liked reading in the past. Then, we read about Marine Le Pen, leader of France’s National front, disowning a remark made by her father, Jean-Marie Le Pen, the founder of the National Front, that the Nazi gas chambers were a mere “detail” of the Second World War. If Ms. Le Pen doesn’t find a way to keep Mr. Le Pen from saying overtly racist things, she may lose the votes of the covert racists she needs to win power in the next French election; but she cannot kick him out of the National Front because he would take a lot of the party’s base with him.
All of a sudden, our parents don’t seem so bad!
Enjoy,
The Daily Me Staff
Seems Like A Good Deal To Me (But, Then Again, I Flunked Grade Three Math…)
SOURCE: Economics For Dummies
[http://www.politicsfordummies.com/entertainmentfordummies/economicsfordummies/home.asp?did=558&dir=bb]
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Gay Drugs? Are Those…Drugs That Make You Happy?
PETITION ACTION ALERT! PETITION ACTION ALERT! PETITION ACTION ALERT!
Reverend Pat “Oral” Righteous is coming under fire for a sermon he recently gave in which he argued that the 1929 children’s book A Sprinkling of Fairy Dust is actually central to a conspiracy to get American children hooked on gay drugs. We have mixed feelings about this, as we fondly remember our parents reading the charming fantasy story about a young girl trapped in a world of exotic creatures to us when we were young. If there was a subtext of support for gay drugs, it in no way appears to have affected any of our adult drug habits.
Still, as an organization that supports bigotry in all of its myriad forms, we cannot in all good conscience do anything but support a religious man’s efforts to take a work of art from a more innocent time out of context to further his hate-filled agenda. So, please sign the petition below to get A Sprinkling of Fairy Dust out of public school libraries and keep our children gay drug free!
SOURCE: Bigots Without Borders
[http://www.bigotswithoutborders.org/]
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If You See The Buddha In The Street, Argue The Merits Of The Second Amendment To Him
Even gun fanatics have to settle.
YOU WANT: To protect yourself from Islamic terrorists who, although they may live half a world away, you are convinced will soon be coming for you.
YOU’LL SETTLE FOR: Protecting your weapons from Liberals who, although they have never actually proposed doing it, you are convinced will soon be coming for your guns.
YOU’LL GET: Accidentally shot to death by your three year-old daughter who found the loaded gun you thought had been securely stored in a shoebox in the bottom of your closet.
SOURCE: Les Pages aux Folles
[http://www.lespagesauxfolles.ca]
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One More Hilary To Climb
Hilary Clinton has announced that she is officially running for President of the United States. Again. The only Americans who were surprised were a couple of inmates in an Arkansas correctional facility who had been in isolation since Carter was President and half a dozen coma patients in a Florida hospital.
Having learned from her previous run at the White House, Mrs. Clinton is being kinder and gentler. In a practical sense, this means that no more than 2,700 children under the age of three in Iowa and three surrounding states will be having nightmares for the next few months.
SOURCE: Jimmy Kippel – Live! (On Tape Delay)
[http://beta.abc.go.com/shows/jimmy-kippel-live-ish/blogs/monologue]
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q Up Another Victory For Canada’s Public Broadcaster
In the wake of the Jian Ghomeshi scandal, the CBC has decided to rebrand Q, the radio show that he once hosted. When it returns to the airwaves with new host Shadrach Kabango, it will be known as…q.
Is the new lower case title intended to signal that the show will be focusing more on low culture? Is that even possible? Is it a sign that CBC management is reconsidering its slavish devotion to its radio hosts? After so many years of Q, didn’t it occur to anybody that the show’s audience deserved some As? We may never know the answers to those questions, but there is one thing about the new title that is clear.
The savings in ink alone should be well worth the change!
SOURCE: Entertainment Right Now, Canada!
[http://www.canada.com/globulltv/globullshows/ern_canada.html]
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Spare Some Sympathy For The Ladies Who Lynch
One of these things is not like the other one. Can you figure out which one of these things doesn’t belong?
1. In 1934, Californian Charles White was charged with lynching for pulling black man Franklin Whitborne out of a jail cell. Whitborne’s lifeless body was subsequently found in a nearby river, beaten to death.
2. In 1937, Californian Goeffrey Blanc was charged with lynching for pulling black man Anton Fletch out of a jail cell. Fletch’s lifeless body was subsequently found hanging from a nearby tree.
3. In 2014, black Californian activist Maile Hampton was charged with lynching for grabbing the handle of a sign held by a protester being detained by police and attempting to pull it away from an officer who was also holding it.
4. In 1935, Californian Rutherford Blondin was charged with lynching for pulling black man Avery Roxton out of a jail cell. Roxton’s badly beaten body was subsequently found in an alley; he died in a hospital three days later.
SOURCE: Politics For Dummies
[http://www.politicsfordummies.com/home.asp?did=820&dir=bb]
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Remaking Canada Into A Military Nation? The Value Of That To The Government Is Classified For Reasons Of National Security!
What is civil unrest in Ukraine worth to the Harper Government of Canada?
Sending 200 soldiers to Kiev to train Ukrainian soldiers? $16 million a year
Restarting the Cold War? Priceless
SOURCE: The Quick and the Detwiler
[http://quick&detwiler.blogspot.com/]
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Global Climate Change Is Democratic: It Will Hurt The Poor More Than The Wealthy
To Drink Grass (verb phrase): To suck on blades of grass, usually from well-manicured lawns or golf courses in wealthy counties of a state that’s in the middle of a drought. EXAMPLE: “After the sixth year of drought in California, they cut off my water, so I went down to Montecito to drink a little grass from a movie star’s lawn.”
Grass Drinker (noun phrase): A person who drinks grass. EXAMPLE: “If this drought doesn’t end soon, the groundskeeper at my golf course will have to carry a shotgun to deter grass drinkers from sucking the fairways dry!”
SOURCE: Michelle’s Obscure Pedantry Page
[http://www.MichellesOPP.ca/blogger.html]
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