They Were Immediately Offered Contracts For The Film Rights To Their Experience
Inconsequential Things – Like Food And Water – Came Next
“Given up for dead, miners freed after 41 days”
– Toronto Star
Shocking! (Sometimes, You Just Have To Go For The Low Hanging Fruit)
“U.S. study sees Taser use go from bad to worse
Weapons meant to curb fatal shootings have been used excessively, analysis suggests”
– Globe and Mail
Playoff Results Clearly Weren’t Jerry-Rigged
“Seinfeld wants Jays vs. Mets”
– Toronto Sun
“Clarity” Defined As “Policies That Benefit Us”
“Wind looks to Ottawa for clarity”
– Globe and Mail
Bacteria Likely To Give You Better Advice Than Your Broker
“Spooked by losses? Check your gut”
– Globe and Mail
Maybe For An Exorcist
“BUCK UP, TORIES, IT’S NOT REALLY ALL THAT BAD
It’s not a total defeat, and the problems with past leadership are easy to solve”
– Ottawa Citizen
People Born With The Wrong Chromosomes Had To Undergo A Sex Change First, But It Was A Small Price To Pay To Be Part Of Man’s Greatest Adventure
“Space station mark 15 years
220 people from 17 countries have manned and resided at lab orbiting Earth”
– Toronto Star
What Possible Benefit Could That Be To – Oh, Wait. Sorry. I Thought You Said “Insectivize…”
“Let’s incentivize our drivers with congestion pricing”
– Globe and Mail
You Make It Sound Like A Menacing Shadow In A Dark Alley
“Shopify’s revenue up 93 per cent, profit looms”
– Toronto Star
Time To Take A Certain headline Writer Out To The Woodsheds And Make Him Faces The Error of His Way
“Kraft Heinz plans to sheds 2,600 jobs”
– Globe and Mail
“Liberals faces tough choices implementing progressive agenda”
– Globe and Mail
Increase In Executive Compensation Made Decision Easier, CEO Admits
“Telus cuts 1,500 jobs, but ups dividend
‘Very difficult decision to make’ will save up to $125M annually”
– Toronto Star
Telus CEO Must Have Gone Through Many
“Can getting a divorce help your career?
One of the most emotionally devastating experiences someone can go through can result in benefits to one’s outlook on work life”
– Globe and Mail
The Scariest Thing About This Halloween Is That Some Parents Don’t Realize This
“Sexy nurse costumes are not OK for kids”
– Toronto Star
Oil Is So Much Cheaper Than Food, Old People Will Be Tempted To Drink It?
“How OPEC is likely ruining your retirement”
– Globe and Mail
Cause, Frankly, You’re Icky, And Only Ickier People Will Follow You
“Aim to lead? Don’t be yourself”
– Globe and Mail
“Fair And Serious” Defined, Of Course, As “Getting What We Want”
They Obviously Studied At The Wind School Of Negotiations
“Porter wants ‘fair, serious’ consideration on island jets”
– Toronto Star
Sure, This Happened Before Standards Were Loosened Starting In The 1980s – You Just Never Heard About It Because…Because…SHUT UP!
“GM lift-gate issue prompts SUV recalls”
– Globe and Mail
“Chicken recalled due to salmonella fears”
– Toronto Star
“Fiat Chrysler recalls 27,500 Darts”
– Globe and Mail
“Fiat recalls 206,668 Jeep Cherokees”
– Globe and Mail
“Toyota recalls 625,000 hybrids”
– Globe and Mail
“GM recalls 1.3 million older cars”
– Globe and Mail
“Fiat Chrysler recalls 1.4M vehicles over hacking flaw”
– Toronto Star
“Ford issues second recall for Windstars”
– Globe and Mail
“B.C. oyster sector chafes at recall”
– Globe and Mail
Six Heirs To The Throne Undone By A Fatal Flaw In A Single Incident?
What Are The Odds?
“Children drown in Greek tragedy”
– Toronto Sun
We Would Recommend Something Involving An Ice Floe
“Want to work longer? Better have a backup plan”
– Globe and Mail
How About…Never? I Like Never. Does Never Work For You?
“Now isn’t the time for Canada to walk away from this fight”
– Toronto Star
Chief Among Them: That Human Beings Need Clean Drinking Water To Survive
“Sewage dump reveals misconceptions”
– Globe and Mail
Hey How Come It’s Okay For You To Talk Business, But If I Made Fun Of Business Now, I Would Be Insensitive?
“Markets brace for short-term hit after attacks
Global stock could see drop following tragedy in Paris, but analysts don’t expect prolonged impact”
– Globe and Mail
Parliamentary Committee Studying Whether To Include Film In Euthanasia Law
“Fan dies days after Seeing Star Wars”
– Toronto Star
You Should Stop Talking Now
You’re Not Helping
Really, Just Stop
“Ensuring you don’t outlive your savings”
– Globe and Mail
“Could Canadians be saving too much for the future?”
– Globe and Mail
For The First Five Seconds Of His – Okay, Times Up
“Take high road when criticizing PM”
– Toronto Sun
The Fact That They Won’t Be Effective Is Clearly Stated In The Fine Print…Need A Magnifying Glass?
“NDP promises carbon curbs that won’t hurt oil patch”
– Globe and Mail
Yep – Definitely Not Effective
“Quebec’s energy policy draws praise from oil and gas sector”
– Globe and Mail
He Would Finally End Marijuana Prohibition, Sure,
But What Would Cheech Do Without Him?
“Why Chong would be a good fit as Tory leader”
– Globe and Mail