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The Daily Me Staff
5) Hope Voters Don’t See Through Step 4) During The Next Election
The Liberal government has a four part plan to deal with incoming American President Donald Trump’s threat to levy a 25% tariff on goods from Canada on his first day in office:
1) After substantial consultations, come to an understanding with the provincial premiers about developing a united front to deal with the American tariffs;
2) Watch as various premiers blow off the consensus reached during the consultations and go in different directions as they negotiate separately with the American government based on provincial priorities;
3) When the hoped for united front collapses, throw yourself on the mercy of the American negotiators;
4) Give the Americans everything they ask for and tell the Canadian public that it is a great victory for Canada.
“It’s a messy process,” admitted Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, “but Liberal governments have negotiated trade deals with the Americans many times, and we like to think that we have perfected our technique.”
SOURCE: Canadian Depress
[http://www.cd.org/english/notforyou.htm]
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And I Haven’t Even Mentioned What Musk Would Do With Transformers!
Elon Musk has been making noises about buying the toy company Hasbro. Why would he devote six billion dollars to buying a company that makes products that he has no expertise in? Musk called D&D, which is currently owned by Hasbro, “woke.” In response, a lead designer for the game said he didn’t “give a shit” about Musk’s opinions.
Six billion dollars is a lot of money to spend on hurt feelings.
Hard to know what Musk thinks is woke about the game. It’s not like dragons sit around talking about how marginalized they feel being excluded from mainstream society or orcs discuss forming unions to get better pay and safer working conditions. Given the proliferation of knights errant, especially safer working conditions. And sure, players can choose to create characters who are a different gender than the one they are, but, honestly, if you’re playing a ten foot tall raging barbarian ogre, most people would accept that you’ve pretty much left objective reality behind!
Even if he does buy the company, it’s not like he can ruin the game: there are plenty of old editions that DMs can use as a basis for homebrewing their own adventures. The only way Musk could force players to use the edition with his slept rules would be to get his bff Donald “Soon To Be But Already Acting Like I Am President” Trump to make it a crime to play D&D with any but the official, Musk-approved guidebooks.
How long do you think Musk would last against thousands of ten foot tall raging barbarian ogres?
SOURCE: Gamer Bois Mag
[http://boiswillbe.com.htm#ipo_article=376]
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Hope Springs A Trap Eternal
SOURCE: Political Appropriation Comix
[https://PolAppCo.commie/new/07440]
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How Do You Think You Will Be Able To Get Major Tech Companies To Agree When You Can’t Even Get Nouns And Verbs To Agree?
“AUSTRALIA
New Law bars minors from social media
Platform have a year to place limits on kids under 16″
– Toronto Star
SOURCE: Billy-Bob’s International House O’ Headlines
[http://www.com/lol.pdqfc.wwygw.wyswyg/fid=1549076838]
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PRO TIP: It Helps Sell The Joke If You Read The Line With An Australian Accent
Conservative Party leader Pierre Poilievre has slammed the Trudeau government’s proposal to remove the GST from all groceries, restaurant meals, children’s clothes, toys, diapers, beer and wine for the holiday season. Poilievre called the move a “tax trick” that would increase inflation.
Pulling out a machete, Poilievre continued: “Now this…this is a tax cut!”
SOURCE: The Irrational
[http://www.mc.ca/stories/2024/11/28/sell&poilievre241128]
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It Would Be A Bargain At Half The Price!
Comcast has announced that it is spinning off many of its properties, including MSNBC.
YOU WANT: MSNBC to be bought by a consortium of journalists led by Rachel Maddow.
YOU’LL SETTLE FOR: MSNBC being bought by Mark Cuban.
YOU’LL GET: MSNBC being bought by Elon Musk.
SOURCE: The Amazing Chocolate Yummies Blog
[http://www.chocoyummies.net/]
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You Have A Problem With Israel’s War Policies? Don’t Start!
Israeli rockets destroyed a military storage facility in eastern Lebanon in apparent violation of a ceasefire announced the day before.
“Did we…? Ceasefire? What? Oh. Right. I, uhh, I’m very sorry about that,” said Hanna Tovah, a minor functionary in the Israeli War is Peace Ministry. “You have to understand that the Israeli military is one of the largest fighting forces the world has ever seen, and sometimes messages take days to filter down to the troops. Sort of like a dinosaur, but with advanced fighter jets. Believe me, if dinosaurs had our weapons, they would have had nothing to fear from some stupid old comet! But, uhh, yeah. Our bad. Won’t happen again. The ceasefire will start…now.”
Later that day, Israeli tanks opened fire on Lebanese civilians in the south who were trying to return to the homes they had been forced to flee when the fighting started over a year ago.
“Oopsies!” the minor functionary responded. “So sorry. Although, let’s be honest, people going back to their homes while our soldiers were still roaming their streets waaaaaas a violation of the ceasefire agreement. You know, technically. Why didn’t the Lebanese government apprise its people of every last detail of the ceasefire accord? You got me. Still, attacking civilians – not a good look. You have my deepest apologies. Not my government’s, but my personal apologies. For what that’s worth. And I promise you, the ceasefire will start…”
SOURCE: The Baghdad Post
[http://www.baghdadpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A49881-2024Nov29.html]
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Their CUPW Runneth Under
The Canadian Union of Postal Workers (CUPW) has announced that calls to union members by Canada Post warning that if a strike continued there would be layoffs was “merely a scare tactic” and that workers should not “panic if [they] receive such a call.” In response, Canada Post has laid off an undisclosed number of its employees.
“Oh!” CUPW responded to the response. “I guess the threats weren’t just a scare tactic. Hunh. Shows you what I know!”
SOURCE: Not to Belabour the Point
[http://www.n2btp.com/content/1&ID=%25%22%2DT%2FRE%2C%20%0A&type=a&mr=332&CFID=723762&CFTOKIN=10721719]
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