So, busk a move…
Hopi springs eternal…
I wanted to create Doonesbury, but it had already been taken…
I wanted to create Waiting For Godot, but it had already been taken…
I wanted to create Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead, but it had already been taken…
So, I’m afraid we’re stuck with this…
Service with a simile…
I no longer collect comic books, but I still have issues…
An adventure in unkempt promises…
Tom Waits for no man…
God is dead, and I’m not feeling very well, either…
Men who envy women because they have children obviously have a natal attraction…
I’m strangely comforted by the knowledge that my bonds will eventually mature even if I don’t…
We know that discussions of oil and alternative fuels revolve around the sacred and the propane…
Where Al Dente is one hardboiled character…
I’m not a big believer in the occult, but there’s no shaman that…
If you believe that the world is too absurd to satirize, you’re not angry enough…
Well, how popular do you think it would have been if it had been called New Romancer?
For the children!
We prefer not to think of stupidity as “intellectual entropy…”
Are people who hate the alligator Lacoste intolerant?
Thank you for your lumbar support…
The only good draft comes in a bottle…
Some days, it doesn’t pay to get out of body…
The Web site that’s quickly losing faith in digital utopias…
Are you going to finish that?
Triumph of the won’t…
Oh, Al, that really Hirts…
Scared sacred…
I like to think my readers aren’t Slavics to fashion…
That’s the nature of all news stations: every 30 minutes and it’s free…
I’d rather prune Danish than prune text…
We may be cash poor, but we’re regrets rich…
Mark and Shania? Alas, never the Twains shall meet…
Top up your fluids, ma’am?
Last week, the phrase in this space was “Top up your fluids, ma’am?” This was meant as an homage to the car commercials of the 1950s. Unfortunately, culture has moved on, and we have received many complaints that this was a prurient reference to a sexual act. Well, three. But, that’s enough. We have fired everybody on staff for this egregious error and profusely apologize for any offence we may have caused.
Could we say that a man who lives in Asia has a Taipei personality?
A cross between a Weblog and a warmed over armadillo…
Hey, don’t blame me – it’s asphalt!
It’s not cynical if you’re wearing a toque when you say it…
Must we allow the mellow fellow to follow the fallow tallow below?
Just because I don’t want to get plugs, must you label me a hairetic?
Adopt a kid or an attitude – your choice…
I used to get a kick out of singing, but now the trill is gone…
Oh, sure, glass gets blown all the time, but I can’t even get to first base!
Somebody should tell John Derringer that it’s a poor workman who blames his tools of the day.
Sure, on the Internet you can say whatever you want, but isn’t that just a case of putting the carte blanche before the hoarse?
Don’t you hate it when people tell you to act your rage?
I say: let sleeping soapmakers lye…
Yes, but, honestly, how well do you know the back of your hand?
This week, a regular character dies!
I’m a doormat for no matador!
The team with the strongest defence always wins the penance…
Do misers mise?
Television expands to fill the leisure time available…
I am blind and my robot dog is dead…
It’s so crazy, it just might…no, it’s too crazy. Forget I mentioned it…
Pinguish not spoken here…
Where people who no longer get freebies are persona non gratis…
Is he a native New Zealander? Maori or less…
We’re not overly hostile – nobody likes a drop deadline…
Peace is peace (accept no substitutes)…
Can you still be a hipster after age has forced you to replace your hips?
Cruel, perhaps, but not all that unusual…
Where you are encouraged to stop and smell the poses…
Ah, Arianna, we’ll always have Paris. Well, we never had Paris, but we could. You buy the tickets and book the room, I’ll bring the orange soda. What? It’s not like you can’t afford it…
God loves me – you should, too…
Now on the Library of Congress’ 10 Most Wanted Fugitives From Justice list…
