Language is the only tool human being employ which changes even as we use it (try that with a monkey wrench!). As the pace of human development speeds up, it becomes harder and harder to pin words down to a specific meaning. In the interest of confusing things further, I offer the following defeinitions of terms currently in use:
Black Dollars: (noun) Hollinger Corporation profits.
Contracting Out: (verb) firing staff and buying back their services at more favourable rates; a polite form of union busting.
Creative Renewal: (noun) the CBC's term for cutting back staff and services, continuing to buy high profile American shows and seeking ever increasing amounts of advertising to make up for budgetary shortfalls. See, also: Repositioning.
Cruise Control: (noun) federal Liberal election strategy.
Cyberpunk: (adjective) teen angst in the computer age.
Daddy Track: (noun) what happens when a man chooses to practice Family values instead of just forcing them on other people; a synonym for career suicide.
Diff: (verb) to be different, as in "I'm drinking the same soft drink as everybody in my demographic in order to diff."
Ethnic Cleansing: (verb) a test of the west's resolve to create a New World Order that respects human rights (synonym: Genocide).
Fast Food: (noun) food that has so little nutritional value, eating it feels like fasting.
Feminine Protection: (noun) a small bore handgun.
Generation X: (noun) a label Baby Boomers have given all succeeding generations denoting their belief that life will never be as good as it was in the sixties.
Germanic Depression: (noun) after a period of steady growth, a sharp downturn in the world economy owing to a weakening Deutschmark.
Hero: (noun) somebody who doesn't steal a radio from a storefront during a riot.
McLaughlin: (verb) to fade slowly from public view, as in "The Council for Interfering with Public Policy on Behalf of Business wanted to lead the charge against a minimum corporate tax, but it McLaughlined."
National Testing: (noun) an educational initiative designed to ensure mediocrity across the entire nation.
Official Bilingualism: (noun) the federal policy where politicians speak the language of nationalism in Quebec and the language of a strong central government in the rest of Canada.
Ontario Film Review Board: (noun) the censor's new clothing.
Paradigm Shift: (noun) a radical change in thinking which will allow you to exchange the last 20 cents in your pocket for a different 20 cents.
Politics of Inclusion: (noun) what you get when you take all the condescending SOBs out of the political loop.
Public Service: (noun) not kicking a begger when you step over him in the street.
Radical Feminism: (noun) any kind of feminism which does not promote women staying at home, having a lot of children and serving their man (conservative definition).
Scopephilia: (noun) unhealthy sexual pleasure derived from using mouthwash.
Sexual Revolution: (noun) a change in social attitudes which meant men could do whatever they wanted sexually, as they always had, but no longer needed to feel guilty about it.
Social Contract: (noun) what unions want to take out on the Ontario NDP.
Special Interests: (noun) any group that wants something from the government, with the exception of anybody speaking on behalf of business (for this, see Consulting With Involved Parties).Spin Doctors: (noun) people who will make you dizzy with their ministrations on behalf of their employers.
Surgical Strike: (noun) a military maneuvre against the press designed to ensure that only pro-Armed Forces information reaches the public.
Sustainable Development: (noun) an oxymoron. See, also: Resource Management.
To Serve and Reject: (verbs) the Toronto police force's response to attempts to bring it under civilian control.
Trickle Down: (verb) what a dog does to the pants leg of a Republican economic adviser.
Virtual Reality: (noun) where most deficit reduction plans originate.
Wonk: (noun) combining equal parts of admiration and derision, a term for a person who is smarter than you are, but has different politics. Example: "That Clinton, he's such a dang policy wonk!"
