Headlines Are Worried About The Rawness of Their Throat...

We Don't Want The War After This One To Be Fought With Clubs?
Politicians Need To Run On This, Because It's A Message I Can Get Behind!

"No-fly zone refusal sends wrong message" - Toronto Star

 Some People Will Cling To Life No Matter The Cost
BaStards!

"A brave new world
On the first day of relaxed masking rules, Toronto greeted the new normal with a collective shrug. Many people kept their faces covered anyway" - Toronto Star

Because Nothing Shows Jesus How Much You Love Him More Than Scarfing A Bag Of Peppermint Barbecue Potato Chips

"Frito-Lay snacks back on shelves
Loblaw, Pepsi-Co end months-long fight over pricing in time for Easter weekend" - Toronto Star

Not The Colour We'd Like To See Added To The Force, But It Could Be A Start...

"GREENING THE BLUE
More police services are looking at adding electric vehicles to their fleets to help reduce emissions" - Toronto Star

Boycott Freedom Hating Headlines!!!!!!!

"Pact not as anti-democratic as convoy was" - Toronto Star

 That Would Be Chechnya, Syria And Ukraine
But We Won't Play Them Until The Third Round...

"Draw looks like a win for Canada
Belgium, Croatia, Morocco tough but no group of death" - Toronto Star

And It Ain't Multiple Choice, Either - This Sucker Is Made Up Of Essay Questions!

"Liberal-NDP pact faces its first big test" - Toronto Star

Or Conservatives Could Appeal To Voters' Irrational Fears - How Does Appealing To Voters' Irrational Fears Work For You?

"Creative policy needed" - Toronto Star

Emma Goldman Approves

"Dark Topics, but You Can Dance to Them" - New York Times

Good - Making Illnesses Is Antisocial

"Family focuses on making memories, not disease" - Toronto Star

Too Bad It Abandoned The Ring And Is Now Battling In The Street

"Ontario steps up its fight" - Toronto Star

Xeno's Climate Assessment

"Climate crisis nears point of no return: UN
Slash emissions by 2025 or prepare for the worst, agency says" - Toronto Star

Somebody Should Explain To The Mayor The Difference Between Being Open For Business And Being Given The Business

"City needs new World Cup dealing
Toronto stands to make only $3.5M from its $93M investment" - Toronto Star

 So, People Trampling All Over Each Other To Get To The Exits Won't Work?
Because, Frankly, That's The Only Plan We've Got

"Key to getting to net-zero is 'orderly transition'
RBC head says better approach to public-private collaboration is needed" - Toronto Star

The New Normal Is A Jealous Partner And Rabbits Are Scared

"Forget about going back to 'normal'" - Toronto Star

 Should We Force Them To Occupy The Place Before We Do That To Them?




I'm Missing Something, Aren't I?

"Non-occupant owners should be kicked out" - Toronto Star

We Don't Use The Term "Stupid." We Prefer "Common Sense"

"You can't mandate no masks in school. Trying is stupid" - Toronto Star

It Would Be If You Would Take Questions From Our Automobiles

"More Canadian oil not the answer" - Toronto Star

How Broadly Defined?

"In the end, most people will want to talk to a human" - Toronto Star

Love Is Promiscuous - It Will Attach Itself To Anything!

"A story of life, love and deception
Filmmaker Lulu Wang's The Farewell turns real-life turmoil into a lightly comic feature" - Toronto Star

 "BREAKING UP IS HARD TO DO
I had my heart broken. I was told I 'wasn't the one.' This, Elena Saplys Krakowski writes, is how I knew I'd still believe in love" - Globe and Mail

 "Eggs are potatoes' true love" - Toronto Star

 "I love St. Mike's. Here's what it got wrong. - Toronto Star

 "Newmarket remembers 'one of our finest'
Michael Norton had love of helping others in his community" - Toronto Star

Oddly Enough, Nobody Complained About A Coalition Afterwards

"Trudeau-Ford sign child-care agreement" - Toronto Star

Corporations Are Such Sleazeball Romeos!

"Bankers say rise in corporate tax will hurt Canada" - Toronto Star

Nothing's Never Enough For You! You Take And Take And Take And Take And Then Sleep Around! Who Do You Think You Are - Our Corporations?

"Canada's defence budget is not enough for U.S." - Toronto Star

That's Because The Virus Is Playing Tag

"Ontario losing its game of make-believe" - Toronto Star

 Once When You Are Born
Once When You Die
Once When You Enter Hell (To Remind You Of What You Have Forever Lost)

"Coffee so good 'you drink it three times'" - Toronto Star

 Oh, Yeah? Tell That To The Ivory-Billed Woodpecker
Or The Jalpa False Brook Salamander
Or The Spix Macaw
Or...

"IT'S TOO SOON TO CRY DOOM
Despite grim UN report, the game is hardly over for Earth, say climate change scientists" - Toronto Star

 Throw It Away? I Didn't Throw It away! I Threw It On A Pile, Burned The Pile To Ashes And Threw The Ashes Into Lake Ontario!
Throw It Away? Are You For Real? What A Waste Of A Pyrrhic Victory That Would Be!

"Please don't throw away that mask yet" - Toronto Star