Les Pages Aux Folles: Oh, Headlines!
Oh, Headlines!
President Assures A Weary Nation That If The Country Had Been Involved, Vladimir Putin Would Have Told Him
"Trump downplays Russia's role in hack"
- Toronto Star
And The Reason We'll Never Be Able To Do It Again
"How The Globe slipped under Xinjiang's Surveillance"
- Globe and Mail
As Long As You're Not Hearing FROM Their Dead Wives, Don't Be Too Concerned
"Dating widowers means hearing about dead wives"
- Toronto Star
But Try Not To Confuse National Politics With Your Personal Life
"Choice is between a gentleman and a tyrant"
- Toronto Star
As Long As Everybody Forgets Why The Economy Was Less Inclusive In The First Place
"A more inclusive economic rebuild is possible"
- Toronto Star
If You're Aiming For The Forehead, You're Doing It Wrong
"When it comes to vaccinations, details matter"
- Globe and Mail
If They Can Get Them By The Age Of 8, The Kids Will Be Theirs For Life
"Premiers past and present agree it's all about the kids"
- Toronto Star
Much Like The Climate
"Climate plan bold, but vulnerable"
- Toronto Star
But We're Finally Getting Good At It!
"To solve gun violence, we can't keep having the same debate"
- Toronto Star
Which Could Result In You Moving From One To The Other
"From condos to coffins, oversight lacking"
- Toronto Star
It Contains 47% Less Save The World
But The Letterhead Is A Lovely Shade Of Blue
"There's an alternative to the Liberal carbon tax: a Conservative carbon tax"
- Globe and Mail
YOU WANT: The Bluebird of Happiness
YOU'LL SETTLE FOR: The Red-breasted Robin Of Getting By
YOU'LL GET: The Yellow-bellied Sapsucker Of Despair
"Make your backyard attractive to birds"
- Toronto Star
Unfortunately For Them, Mitch McConnell Doesn't Eat Food (He Lives Off The Crushed Hopes Of Others)
"Restaurant closing in the U.S. top 110,000
Industry association pleads for aid legislation"
- Toronto Star
Business Can Start
"Time for governments, businesses to work together"
- Toronto Star
Unless You Use A Script To Run Your Life, In Which Case...Yeah...
"'Reality TV' and 'reality' two different things"
- Toronto Star
And, If You Do, Why Should We Vote For You, Again?
"Herd immunity is a great strategy if you don't mind millions dead"
- Globe and Mail
First Thing It Says Is: "What Am I?"
"Woman teaches Sheepadoodle how to communicate"
- Toronto Star
This Just In: Water Still Flows Downhill And Reboots And Remakes Still Dominate Hollywood
"Opposition parties unhappy with Liberal Plan"
- Toronto Star
It Certainly Isn't Ignoring Us
"We can't ignore climate change"
- Toronto Star
If You Have Rogers, You Will Be Able To Find It On Channel 747
"Our cautious start to assisted suicide is accelerating toward death-on-demand"
- Globe and Mail
It's Not Much In Life, Either, But We Learn To Live With It...
"'Uncertainty in business is not cool'"
- Toronto Star
The Fact That They Are Rarely Seen In Public Together Does Suggest A Serious Rift, Though
"Responsibility and profit are not mutually exclusive"
- Toronto Star
But...Didn't That Video Rental Chain Go Out Of Business A Long Time Ago?
"Blockbuster deal unites Aphria and Tilray"
- Toronto Star
When I Say It Out Loud Like This, It Seems Obvious...
"Female journalists should not be subjected to abuse"
- Toronto Star
A Welcome Source Of Certainty In These Highly Uncertain Times
"An effective recovery for Toronto must be inclusive"
- Toronto Star
"Indigenous women must lead action plan"
- Toronto Star
"When borders close, we must keep our minds open"
- Globe and Mail
"Canada must defund pipelines and fund green plan instead"
- Toronto Star
"Children with disabilities must get respect and dignity"
- Toronto Star
Are You Kidding? Just Talking About Reducing Carbon Emissions Risks Angering The Energy Gods!
"Big oil, but small ambition
For all the recent net-zero talk, Canadian oil companies have yet to take meaningful risks"
- Toronto Star
Isn't There A Movement To Deal With Exactly This Issue?
"Peel families demand change in how police deal with mentally ill"
- Toronto Star
There Was No Need: It's Only Fatal For People It Kills
"Many who tested positive worried about death: poll"
- Toronto Star
We're Dead (Not That I'm Worried...)
"Provinces need a co-ordinated, uniform plan to defeat this virus"
- Toronto Star
Was Willing To Throw In The Plague For A Nominal Fee, But Servier Inexplicably Passed
"Agios to sell cancer portfolio to Servier for $1.8B"
- Toronto Star
Being A Newspaper Headline Writer, Not Of So Much
"This year is as good of a time as any to be an elite banker"
- Toronto Star
Serious Footwear Waits Sadly At Home For A Phone Call That Never Comes
"Pandemic sparks love for casual footwear"
- Toronto Star
