If You Don't Get the Cover You Want, You Go With the Cover You Get...

I hadn't intended on using capitals, BUT SHIFT HAPPENS...
You don't like Scandinavian pleasure? Well, fahrvegnugen you!
Nathan's nascent nacelles noshed on innocent nachos...
Lots of Lott's loot is loose...
I kept a potato in front of the television for several days, but the experience in no way ruined its eyes!
Worried about the change of seasons? Just open your mouth and say, "Awwwtumn..."
In the long run we're all John Maynard Keynes...
My problem is that when I was young my mother never warned me not to run down the hallways of my mind with sharp ideas...
As Tolstoy truly wrote: all positive book reviews are the same, all negative book reviews are negative in their own way...
NewsMulch: We aggregate it so you can be aggravated...
The terrif tariff will tear if we don't share with the sheriff
Feedback is loopy!
Mt arches have fallen and they can't get up!
The pun is mightier than the word...
It's interesting how politicians who know nothing no everything...
What kind of list of things they want to do before they die do buckets make?
Who is Ben Wa, and why does he let women play with his - oh!
Abe's Abba babes babbled about Babylon...
The bike pedalling book peddler backpedalled on his book piddling...
I didn't want to see the film about the guy who has to prepare to go out in the snowstorm a second time because I hate reboots...
Not all those who wonder are lustful...
You know how it is: the porn giveth and the porn taketh away...
The only thing we have to fear are ferrets themselves!
Life expands to fill the time allotted to it...
The odder odor of the Oder spun my rotor...
Les Pages aux Folles: putting the GENIUS back in disingenuous...
As I get older and can't keep track of the order of "i" and "e," more and more I appreciate a good vowel movement...
I can get you 10,000 Twitter followers in no time! How? Follow any marketer who promises to get you 10,000 Twitter followers in no time, and 10,000 other marketers will follow you in no time!
My writing style? I'm definitely a Pancer...
Nice guys finish last...but they're okay with that.
Maybe there is nothing new under the sun, but at least some things are really, really obscure...
Coronation Street - isn't that a song by The Cure?
RULES FOR PLAYING MIND GAMES: RULE ONE: Acquire a mind...
Finally, this shit is getting surreal!
Did you follow along with the wrong thing throng?
You call it a nap, I call it the day's reboot...
I know enough to know that I don't know enough...
I think it's my boundless humility that makes me so much better than other people...
Does this dress make my beats look phat?
The chrain in Spain falls mostly on the mundane...
The thrilled thrall threw the ball at y'all...
I am become death, destroyer of worms...
You know you're a writer when you think of a threesome as a "trilogy..."
Yes, I'm getting older; it's a process I like to think of as the hardening of the old farteries...
Oh, no! Shlomo's slow-mo promo is a no go!
Les Pages aux Folles puts the rookie back in parochial!
Weimar? Why not!
When it came to the opera singer's aria, was it bel canto...or bel wonto?
Simon sampled Samantha's Samoan samosas...
The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing people that he was too big to fail...
Couche-Tard's Bouchard tried to retard the lard bard...
I'm not immature, I'm just young after my time...
There are no bad questions, only answers you don't want to hear...
If the plural of loaf is loaves, why is the plural of oaf not oaves?
I don't want to say she was a bad girlfriend, but me and Melba are toast!
Les Pages aux Folles: the Web page that is often knackered, but never lacquered!
As I've gotten older, my body has malfunctioned in such a variety of ways that I wouldn't be surprised to find out I was a character in a Samuel Beckett novel!
Les Pages aux Folles: making the interrobang respectable one exclaiming question at a time...or, is it‽