The Tech Answer Guy Has Some Mansplainin' Tooo Dooooo... [ARNS]

Yo, Tech Answer Guy,

In the Star Blap: Several Generations Removed episode "Balance of Fiber," Captain Plush invokes Section 23 dash 17 Alpha of the Star Bleep Command Manual to execute the Corbamite Manoeuvre against the Klippon attack vessel K'rrrtangie. However, in the Star Blap (The Original Series) episode "Beyond the Event Horizon...And Beyond!", the Corbamite Manoeuvre is actually a trick Captain Pompous plays on Doctor Excitable involving seven tubs of ice cream and a mule.

Was somebody in the writer's room not paying attention?

Yo, Marns,

If you had actually read The Star Blap Pop-up Specs Book instead of studying the ship schematics, you would realize that Corbamite is a fundamental part of the Fuel Matrix that powers the star ship Finicky. (That and quantum foam, which, if you had ever been a teenage boy in a grade school physics class, you would know can, in a pinch, be used to shave with.)

The Corbamite Manoeuvre involves venting large amounts of the material into space. It's a high tech way of farting at your enemy - talk about silent but deadly! Toss a photon torpedo at the Corbamite cloud, and the resulting explosion will take out a Klippon attack vessel and show your disdain for the military leaders who sent it after you in the first place! Obviously, this kind of power would not be appropriate for a mere prank.

Besides, the radioactivity Corbamite gives off would melt ice cream faster than you could say, "I'm a doctor, dammit, not a party coordinator whose colour blindness leads him to decorate everything in varying shades of mauve and - holy wow, this is turning out to be a long sentence - did I say dammit at the beginning?!"

Actually, if you had been paying attention, you would have known that, before its usefulness as a fuel was discovered, Corbamite was used as a dessert topping; apparently, it tasted likes strawberries with a slight touch of cadmium. This was well-established in The Original Series episodes 12, 27 and sometimes 63. This would put Corbamite well within the range of prankable elements.

What's more worrying to me than this obvious factual error is the dismissive attitude with which you expressed it. You wouldn't be so condescending to a man you happened to disagree with - hostile, dismissive or just plain rude, perhaps, but not condescending. Sounds to me like you've been indulging in a little mainsplainin'.

Oh, and shaving with quantum foam only works if you don't mind being unsure if your stubble is there or gone depending upon who is looking at your chin. I wouldn't suggest going to a job interview in this condition!

Yo, Jens,

Well, yes, of course Corbamite was used as a dessert topping in The Original Series. So was methane. In fact, in the episode "Band of Brooders." so was Doctor Excitable's cane. The point is that even though it was a groundbreaking series for its time (yes, the canisters in which they kept the film were that heavy) they were still exploring the Star Blap universe. It wasn't until Several Generations Removed that things started to make sense, so that's the one I base my judgments about the series on.

As for the other point you made, me condescend to women? Listen, toots, I love women. Just ask Misses The Tech Answer Guy. Okay, she'll probably refuse to get involved; she doesn't like public attention. Some women can be touchy that way.

And, what, exactly, the hell is "mansplainin'?"

Mansplainin' happens when a man gives a condescending answer that invariably contains inaccurate information to a question asked by a woman. Regardless of the inaccuracy of the response, it is delivered with the slimy certainty that of course he is right, because he is the man in this conversation. The implication is that the women shouldn't be asking men questions, especially of a technical nature.

Yo, Bons,

Okay, in the first place, I think you completely made that up. That doesn't sound real and, in any case, I couldn't find it in the OED! And, in the second place, I don't act like that. Mainsplainin' - what will you girls think of next?

Otherwise, thanks for the explanation.

Oh, I get it. You aren't a condescending male prick - you have just given us a tongue in cheek example of mansplainin'! Well done!

Yo, Mats,

Err, yeah. Sure. Okay. Let's go with that.

The Tech Answer Guy

If you are a dude with a question about the latest technology, ask The Tech Answer Guy by sending it to questions@lespagesauxfolles.ca. Just remember: I think we've all learned a valuable lesson today. I...hope it's the same one for everybody...