One can't help but feel happy for New York as the Amazin' Mets swept to a seventh game come-from-behind thrill-a-minute World Series victory against the Boston Red Sox this week. The city has a lot to be proud of, not the least of which being the restraint with which its inhabitants celebrated the victory (restraint in New York consisting of minimal property damage and loss of life).
Not wishing to take anything away from the accomplishments of either the city or its ball club, I think it might be time to put the victory into some sort of perspective. As a guide, let us answer the question, "How has the 1986 World Series improved the human condition?"
It is at once obvious that the 1986 World Series was not a cure for cancer. Unlike the 1974 World Series, which held great promise of a medical breakthrough, the 1986 World Series was discounted almost from the opening pitch. Laboratory tests quickly dispelled rumours that this could be the year baseball made medical history.
In the same vein, the 1986 World Series did not cure MS, TB, AIDS, Alzheimer's Disease of Downe's Syndrome. There did seem to be a connection between the 1986 World Series and the common cold, as evidence from previous World Series had shown. However, the increase of absenteeism due to colds during the World Series declined dramatically when the advent of better stadium lighting caused a shift to night games.
The 1986 World Series did not contribute to world peace. Not only did tensions between the United States and Russia not ease, but the various wars being played out in dozens of areas around the world were not visibly affected. Political scientists have suggested that baseball's lack of international effect is because the so-called World Series is actually only open to two countries, which tends to alienate the other 150 countries which, in fact, make up the world.
Allowing other nations to compete in the World Series, notably Japan, Cuba and a variety of Latin American countries, is generally considered a step towards a united, peaceful world. However, a small number of far-right and far-left political theorists resist the idea, pointing out that if a team from a country other than the United States were to win the World Series, all hell would undoubtedly break loose.
In local politics, the 1986 World Series was considered a positive event, if only because politicians concerned with baseball were less likely to be shafting their constituents.
For the 83rd year in a row, baseball in general, and the World Series in particular, did nothing to alleviate the problem of world hunger. The United nations Secretary General issued a communique in October regretting the world hunger problem and congratulating Mets star Ray Knight for winning the Series' Most Valuable Player award.
The 1986 World Series clearly did address specific issues of justice. Was it just for Oil-can Boyd to be benched in the seventh and deciding game? Was it just for New York to win the sixth game of the series in the bottom of the tenth inning on two consecutive errors by Boston, thus solidifying Boston's reputation as a team that chokes in the clutch? The World Court at the Hague was prepared to consider the latter question until it was pointed out that the United States no longer honoured World Court decisions, so it recessed instead.
But, what of the larger, perhaps unanswerable questions of social justice? Did the 1986 World Series adjust the inequalities between men and women? Did the 1986 World Series ease the tensions between the various minority groups that make up society? Did the 1986 World Series close the income gap between the classes?
Frankly, no. It didn't do any of these things.
But, as the vast number of books about the sport that came out in the spring suggested, baseball can be seen as a metaphor for all human activity. Thus, the truck driver hauling his load, the cop on the beat, the couple making love, the person running the projector, the telephone operator and the guy in the sewer can all find lessons in the activities of the 18 sweaty men in tights on the diamond.
Personally, I don't buy it. Regardless, it has been a disappointing year for baseball and the World Series.
ENDING OF THE MONTH CLUB SELECTION: Now, if it had been the Blue Jays that had won...
ENDING OF THE MONTH CLUB ALTERNATE SELECTION 1: But, this is just nitpicking. Congratulations, New York. You deserve it.
ENDING OF THE MONTH CLUB ALTERNATE SELECTION 2: But, can you imagine what the world would be like if all the attention given the World Series had been given to these problems instead?
ENDING OF THE MONTH CLUB ALTERNATE SELECTION 3: Now, if you want to talk about the betterment of mankind, let's talk about those Leafs!
