"I don't know about this, Fred."
"Now, Wilma. There's nothing to worry about. We just talk for a few minutes, and tomorrow, we'll be on TV!"
"But, what if we say something dumb?"
"Oh, they can just edit that out."
"But, they don't always edit out the dumb things, do they?"
"Oh, Wilma, you worry too much!
"Hello, Mr. and Mrs. ... Wilson, is sit?"
"That's right."
"I'm Rex Veneer. I'll be interviewing you..."
"Hello, Mr. Veneer. I like your interviews."
"Why...thank you."
"I wore my good suit especially for the interview, Mr. Veneer."
"That...that's nice. But, you didn't have to. The viewers are only going to see you from the shoulders up."
"Oh."
"Now, are we ready, Paul?"
"Ready when you are, Rex."
"You won't let me say anything dumb, will you?"
"Of course not, Mrs. Wilson. Let's begin... Good evening, and welcome to the first installment of our new segment, Just Plain Folks. I'm your host, Rex Veneer. Tonight, I'll be talking to Fred and Wilma Wilson from Dubuque, North Carolina."
"Hi."
"Hello."
"Well, Mr. and Mrs. Wilson, how does it feel to be on television?"
"Oh. Okay."
"Better than okay. It feels...fine. Just fine."
"I see. And, this is your first time on television?"
"That's right."
"Yep."
"So, you aren't celebrities?"
"Oh, no."
"Nope. We're just plain folks."
"Ha. Ha. Well, that is what the show is about. But, tell me, in all seriousness, do either of you have an opinion on the international situation?"
"The international situation? Uhh...can't say as I have an opinion, no."
"N...not me. No."
"No ideas at all?"
"Well..."
"Yes?"
"I'm afraid not."
"Why don't we get right down to issues, then? Do you have anything to say on the upcoming summit between Russian Premier Mikhail Gorbachev and President Ronald Reagan?"
"Oh, I...I like the President..."
"Sure. I think he'll do alright."
"Yeah. He always impressed me on TV."
"I see. How have the economic conditions in the country affected you?"
"Can't complain."
"We're managing."
"But...okay. Fine. Is there anything going on that makes you really angry? Anything at all?"
"Umm...can't think of anything offhand. What about you, hon?"
"Nope. Not really."
"Are there any final words you'd like to add?"
"No, I think we covered just about everything."
"I'm satisfied."
"Okay, then. I'd like to thank our guests, Mr. and Mrs. Wilson from Dubuque, North Carolina, for appearing on the show. Be with us next time for another episode of Just Plain Folks... Are we off, Paul?"
"Clear, Rex."
"We've got to talk."
"Were we okay?"
"You were fine, folks. You were just being yourselves, and you can never go wrong doing that."
"When can we see ourselves?"
"We'll let you know. Thanks for coming."
"Thanks for having us. That wasn't so bad, now, was it, dear?"
"No, I guess it went pretty well..."
"Paul, whose dumb idea was this?"
"Yours, Rex."
"Yeah, of course. God, what I wouldn't give for five minutes with Prince Charles! Well, I'm only doing 20 or 30 more, and then I'm quitting. Surely, there must be some plain folks out there who can talk when a camera is pointed at them!"
"We're not dealing with stars who are used to being interviewed in front of the camera, Rex. That was the whole idea..."
"Yeah, well it's dumb! Alright...who's next?"
