Les Pages Aux Folles: Headline Humour Is So 60s!
Headline Humour Is So 60s!
That Way, We Can Fail Better
"The Afghan mission
Canada takes notes from failed Soviet war"
- Globe and Mail
The Richter Scale - Not Just For Geological Phenomena Any More
"Mascara that'll shake your world"
- Toronto Star
News You Can Use, Unless You Can't
"Coal's high price fuels a new ball game
A wave of consolidation may be in the works, but some observers say it could just as easily not happen"
- Globe and Mail
Because, If We Learned Anything From The Residential Schools Fiasco, It's That It's Never Too Early In Life To Give A Native Person A Grievance
"Mountie cleared in pepper-spraying of aboriginal group that included baby"
- National Post
Actually, They Were Stunned Long Before That
"Checks on Bernier raised no alarms
Opposition stunned to learn reports of Couillard's links to organized crime not deemed worthy of follow-up"
- Globe and Mail
Sad, Really, That This Should Be Considered News
"Money is not always the motivating factor"
- Toronto Star
Sadder, Still, That The News Hasn't Reached The Post
"Do You Really Need five necklaces for a three-day weekend?"
- National Post
And, He's An Atheist
"Mugabe declares 'only God' can take him from office"
- Globe and Mail
W...Wait - You Mean To Say That Those Green Pledges We Made Could Actually...Cost...Us...Money?
"Green begins to fade
As costs rise, business cools to carbon tax, such as that outlined in Liberal Leader Stephane Dion's plan"
- Globe and Mail
"It's not easy being green, but it's good business"
- Globe and Mail, next page
Well, Sure, Paul, We All Feel That From Time To Time, And Yet?
"Sexual 'anxiety' drove me: Bernardo"
- Toronto Star
If They Could Just Pull Themselves Off The Floor, Drunken Sailors Would Object To That Analogy
"Number of foreclosed homes continues to rise"
- Globe and Mail
"Recession 101: Making a disaster work for you."
- Globe and Mail
"The party's over for Canadian spendthrifts
Fewer jobs, a housing market chill, soaring energy and food costs - consumers won't be spending like 'drunken sailors' any more"
- Globe and Mail
It Would Be Cheaper To Let Them Die, But The "Family Values" Lobby Would Never Let The "Loopy Libertarians" Say That...Out Loud...
"Lack of cheap food will last up to 2017
Commodity forecasts suggest Third World's hungry will need more aid, agencies report"
- Toronto Star
Too Easy
"Growth versus dividend stocks
Call me crazy, but I'm sticking to my plan"
- Globe and Mail
When It's A Hamster And Cheese Sandwich
"When's a guarantee not a guarantee?"
- Toronto Star
Does The Pentagon Know This Secret Has Been Revealed?
"Cooking for kids 101: stealth veggies"
- Globe and Mail
No, But It Is Killing Art Klinghoffernan, And His Family Wishes It Would Stop
"Is digital killing the art of photography?"
- NOW
On The Plus Side? It Does Keep Satan's Fuel Costs Down
"Road to hell is paved with public transit"
- Globe and Mail
They Obviously Haven't Heard Of Satan's Green Plan
"Soaring prices spur increase in oil field thefts"
- Globe and Mail
IRA? Really? I Thought We Had Moved Beyond That
"Three suspected IRA members acquitted of involvement in 2005 Belfast killing"
- National Post
Bad Puns In Newspaper Headlines Give Me...You Know...
"Hit TV series Corner Gas to run out in 2009"
- Globe and Mail
"One more year and CTV runs out of Gas"
- Toronto Star
Maybe We Should Be Exploring In The Phantom Zone
"Soaring oil spurs call for new supply"
- Globe and Mail
After All, There Are Still Innocent People To Incarcerate, And Lots Of Panic Left To Justify It
"Terror
No time for complacency"
- Globe and Mail
That's How They Determine How Much Welfare To Give You (Well, That And Bust Size)
"Hard times, but your lips look great"
- Toronto Star
I'm More Concerned About What It Will Do The Day After Tomorrow
"What will Ottawa do after 2011?"
- Toronto Star
We Want You To Be Outraged, We Just Refuse To Tell You What At - Can't You Use The Imaginations That We've Discouraged You From Developing?
"China's angry, uncertain reaction
A rattled government in Beijing is censoring coverage of the protests, yet at the same time lashing out at them"
- Globe and Mail
