Horoscopes For Those With No Future

YOUR DAILY HOROSCOPE

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: Venus in Cancer continues to bring rain from cloud-darkened skies. This will impart a potential continuation of the downturn in fortunes for the water signs of Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces. Invest in canned goods, clean water and shelter.

IF TODAY IS YOUR BIRTHDAY
Congratulations.

PISCES (February 20 – March 20)
Powerful emotions make it hard to think straight. Logic gets thrown out the window along with Molotov cocktails and other improvised explosive devices. What you now feel needs to get aired and expressed. Do it, and then just wait for the soldiers and an uncomfortable prison cell.

ARIES (March 21 – April 20)
Limits, boundaries and barriers are pricking your rebellious nature. The greater the resistance, the greater will be your resolve to overcome them. Don’t forget the reasons why running barriers is a bad idea – a really bad idea – a really, really bad idea – and avoid making it happen.

TAURUS (April 21 – May 20)
No matter how thoroughly you think things through, there is no escaping the reality that you cannot make the changes that have to be made to your current state of affairs. Going back to bed is the best possible thing for you. If possible, for several weeks.

GEMINI (May 21 – June 21)
You may not be happy with the way things are going. You may even prefer to choose a different direction entirely. But even the stuff you are not so keen on has – you know what? Talking about magic seems wildly inappropriate in this context, so why don’t we just leave it at the first two sentences?

CANCER (June22 – July 22)
Being stuck between a rock and a hard place isn’t all that bad. Comfort is on the way. Initially, what arrives may just look like more misery, so be prepared to exercise your imagination so you don’t miss it when it comes.

LEO (July 23 – August 22)
The problem you are dealing with has no purpose. Your drama is not happening for any discernible reason. Don’t trust the universe – it has an ulterior motive – just do your best with what is confronting you. There is absolutely no reason to believe that there is anything to win.

VIRGO (August 23 – September 22)
There are some things that it is unwise to keep doing, so stop. Be a little more self-disciplined for the sake of your future well-being. If that doesn’t work, think of your family. Your friends. Your neighbours. In fact, stop thinking about yourself – you’re all in it together.

LIBRA (September 23 – October 23)
It may seem wiser to go for a brand new alternative than to stick with what you’ve got, but you’re stuck with what you’ve got. With some thickly applied fantasy, you can end up thinking you have something better than you had in the first place.

SCORPIO (October 24 – November 22)
Keep using the obscenities that give courage to soldiers. And keep the meaning of these obscenities foremost in your mind. Do not dwell on the past. Soon, the future will catch up with you, and what has been will no longer matter.

SAGITTARIUS (November 23 – December 21)
All is not perfect. It seldom is. Problems have a way of coming back like recurring nightmares. There is more to your situation than meets the eye. There is plenty that can be said, although little to be done, to improve a situation that you fear will lead you into severe depression. Grown adults can behave like children. Pessimists, in all shapes and sizes, are proclaiming messages of doom and destruction. Go for something herbal, like chamomile, valerian or St. John’s Wort, or just sip water and slowly breathe in the fresh air. You might as well be chilled out when the worst happens.

CAPRICORN (December 22 – January 20)
Signs like “Keep Out, No Entry” and “Road Closed” restrict your freedom of movement. These are in the physical landscape, but some also exist in your mind. Don’t worry so much about the ones in your mind: it is time to take down some of the outer notices.

AQUARIUS (January 21 – February 19)
With Uranus, planet of disruption, making waves, it would seem that something has got to give – yikes! You need to calm yourself down, not wind yourself up. Stay positive and you’ll find that reality really doesn’t matter as much as you think.