Thank you, The Wobbly Pops Summit, Inc., for signing up for The Daily Me. Our search engine has combed the Internet for up to the minute news items that fit the profile you have so painstakingly filled out for us. Then, we weighted the probability that you would be interested in these articles against forms which showed what people with tastes similar to yours have liked reading in the past. And, then, the high cost of apartments and condos in the city forced us to rent a recreational vehicle to live in, and we couldn't be happier! Living an apartment, we had got used to the tyranny of a single scene outside of our window; now, there's a different scene every day! Sometimes more if people who live on the street where we park object to our being there and threaten to call the cops on us! Not only that, but we don't have to spend any money on a MetroPass to get around! Of course, we have to spend money on gas and vehicle maintenance, but you never hear a turtle complain about such things, so why should we? On the plus side, we never have to look for a public bathroom, because we always carry one around with us! And...and...and...
What has become of this world?
Enjoy,
The Daily Me Staff
Conservative governments generally claim to want to preserve the best of their jurisdictions' traditions. In some cases, this expresses itself in a desire to return to a previous, simpler time. In Alberta, this apparently means a return to a time when E. coli poisoning killed children.
"Cutting government red tape is necessary to unleash the power of corporate innovation, something that has been stifled since the 1950s," stated Premier Danielle Smith. "Ah, the 1950s. Thunderbirds and impalas. Sock hops and first kisses at the prom. No uppity minorities trying to upset the social order! We're coming, 1950s! We're coming! Wait for us! We'll return to you as soon as we can!"
SOURCE: Festerin' Report
[http://www.ax2grindnet.com/festerinreport/web/feature222222222222-2.html]
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The Cause Of Death Has Been Reported As An Aggressive Far Right Cancer Complicated By Political Apathy
After decades of chronicling Canada's wealthy and powerful, 94 year-old Peter C. Newman has, himself, become history.
SOURCE: Obits 'R Us
[http://www.king.ids.net/~bdlm/obits_r_us.html]
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"Fortunately, None Of That Applies To Congresspeople, Or I Would Be Selling Pencils On K Street."
SOURCE: No Comment Quotes
[http://thesepeopleareinsane.psy/update.toshtml]
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Musk We Do This?
He bought a company for twice its worth
Then ran it directly into the earth
Starting the beginning of a death spiral
Then he turned on the spigot
For conspiracy theorists and racist bigots
Whose every hateful word went viral
This incompetent capitalist is always looking to make a killin'
Literally
Elon Musk has become a Bond villain
If, for infamy, a man is shootin'
He could do worse than back Vladimir Putin
The bloodthirsty warlord, Russian
Cutting off Starlink communications in Ukraine
While its troops were fighting on difficult terrain
Assisted in the Soviet despot's freedom fighter's crushin'
To aid a crazed dictator he's more than willin'
Sadly
Elon Musk has become a Bond villain
When international communications are dominated by one man
He can laugh while governments around him plan
There's very little they can do about it
The issue isn't open for debates
Even though his actions go against the official foreign policy of the United States
He has the power, you should never doubt it
In jail is where this traitor should be chillin'
Scarily
Elon Musk has become a Bond villain
SOURCE: Poetry, Cornered
[http://www.cibc.com/ca/personal/poetrycorner/887.html]
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@JakeSherman
Trump signals to @hughhewitt that he would be interested in debating Megan Markle. Trump said that he "didn't like the way she dealt with the Queen."
SOURCE: Ending Trending Web Site
[http://endingtrending.blurgh/trump-wouldnt-leave-a-markle-on-her/]
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The End Of The World Is Naomi!
Dr. Klein and Ms. Wolf
Roberta Louise Stephenson
Doublecrossday Books
100 pages
Political commentator and social activist Naomi Klein experiments with right-wing Kool-Aid; soon after Naomi Wolf, a rabid anti-vaxxer who haunts Steve Bannon's podcasts, becomes a darling of far right media. Wolf, a curdled version of Klein's idealism, takes on a life of her own, blurring the line between their distinct personalities. Can Klein assert her individuality before her public persona is completely consumed by Wolf?
SOURCE: Unread Book News
[http://217.204.45.12/cgi/NGoto/2/64382861?3518]
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Judge Not Lest Ye Spend Eighteen Months In Jail Only To Be Released Without Trial
2 long and gone) One judge threw out a criminal case because the court was dank and mouldy, which should have pleased conservatives who want to take Ontario back to medieval times. At least two other criminal cases were thrown out because the docket was so overloaded and the court so understaffed that they couldn't be brought within an 18 month time limit set by the Supreme Court of Canada. On what juridical principle is the devolution of the province's justice system based? a) justice delayed is justice that is cost effective b) justice is blind, but it does have access to your bank account thanks to adaptive computer technology c) the law is a ass
some1 can't handle the truth!) How can Conservatives who starve the judicial system of funding claim to be a party that supports law and order? a) they have nice photo ops with cops b) for them, law is made to order c) they have decades of proclamations that they are the party that supports law and order, so they figure they'll see how long they can coast on their self-made reputation before the public catches on - hee hee, they're such scamps!
SOURCE: Les Pages aux Folles
[http://www.lespagesauxfolles.ca]
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SOURCE: Billy-Bob's International House O' Headlines
[http://www.com/lol.pdqfc.wwygw.wyswyg/fid=3176533083]
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